Boy, this “Wonkette for a Day” gig has left me winded! Who knew so many readers avidly missed Ana Marie Cox with such fervent passion? I’m telling you, the ol’ inbox is filled with missives decrying the site’s lack of wit and wisdom in weeks past. Well, folks, you’re all set for a welcome change, then, cos this hilarious fella is here to stay!
Just look at our revised corporate photo spread from this month’s issue of Vanity Fair:
Hair by Kiehl’s, image manipulation by Adobe
That’s me in the beautiful green dress and vibrant red hair, in case you’re wondering. Me, the newest asset to the Gawker Media empire, with my sexy little tattoos! I’m so pretty, so carefree, so fucking male!
UPDATE: OK, I clearly am prone to mess-ups and sundry other misinterpretations. This is my third “update”, you’ll notice. It seems that when they offered me this daylong gig, they did, in fact, mean just that. One day. Not some sort of trial implementation where as the afternoon waned, my temporary site supervisor would offer me the fulltime Wonkette gig. Nope, it just wasn’t meant to be. And you know what really smarts?
I even quit my day job for this! Anyways, that’s goodbye, I guess. For good. Farewell to my newfound fans and friends! Monday’ll have a new “Wonkette for a Day”. And it won’t be me.
(Confidential to Assistant Regional Manager Jerry: Can I pleeeeease come back to work? I’m sorry about the diaper comment, for reals.)
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