• February 13, 2012
  • A PIMPLE?: Regular cancer-getter John McCain “had a spot removed from his face on Monday during a routine checkup by a doctor in Phoenix, an aide said.” McCain’s team has called it a “precautionary removal.” And was the “precaution” that he would die of vicious cancer if they didn’t remove it? [Reuters]

{ 36 comments }

superfecta July 28, 2008 at 2:33 pm

He’d better avoid Novak and co., then; I hear you can catch a brain tumor ever faster than teh gay.

mookworthjwilson July 28, 2008 at 2:35 pm

Who would win in a fight? McCain’s cancer vs. Barry’s hip?

freakishlystrong July 28, 2008 at 2:36 pm

It was what was left of his dignity…

Serolf Divad July 28, 2008 at 2:36 pm

$10.00 to the first reporter who asks McCain about his “preemptive” surgery.

AngryBlakGuy July 28, 2008 at 2:37 pm

…can this guy have anymore of his face removed?!

AfghanVet July 28, 2008 at 2:38 pm

It was a hickey left on his face from W’s puckered asshole.

BadNewsJack July 28, 2008 at 2:39 pm

As long as they’re operating on his face, can they fix that smile, or is that something even modern medicine cant fix?

Squiggyfm July 28, 2008 at 2:40 pm

At this rate, there wouldn’t be any McCain left to take office if he were to win.

columnv July 28, 2008 at 2:42 pm

Wouldn’t you hate to go in the doctor to have shit just randomly removed???

Q2 July 28, 2008 at 2:42 pm

[re=45540]freakishlystrong[/re]: WIN

Anita Cocktail July 28, 2008 at 2:43 pm

Geez, it must be that gold standard health insurance that our tax dollars pay for. The rest of us have to pop our zits in the bathroom mirror by ourselves.

tsunami July 28, 2008 at 2:43 pm

i just want to remind y’all that no decent human being would make
light of this serious medical problem or hope that it freakin’
kills him before the election so sen. obama can win in a landslide
and save the country and we’ll all live happily ever after.

so, please, don’t let that notion cross your mind.

SayItWithWookies July 28, 2008 at 2:44 pm

How can a guy who spent five-and-a-half years in the shade get so much melanoma?

FMA July 28, 2008 at 2:45 pm

[re=45558]tsunami[/re]: What kind of people do you think we are?
OK, don’t answer that.

Advocatus_Diaboli July 28, 2008 at 2:46 pm

From the Reuters story: “The fourth melanoma was invasive and was removed from his left temple ….”

Would that be the “melanoma” left on his face from from a certain melanin-rich candidate?

Canuckledragger July 28, 2008 at 2:46 pm

When he came to address the Canuckistani Economic Club, you’ll recall that bullshit about him having hit his head trying to get into a car, leading to the bandaid on the head. At the time, I TOLD YOU PEOPLE he had some free Canuckistani health care, where the procedure could be done without prying media eyeballs and subsequent press accounts of his unwellness.

THIS IS THE SAME PUSTULE HE HAD LANCED IN OTTAWA CITY! REUTERS KNOWS, BECAUSE REUTERS IS CANUCKISTANI, TOO!

WAKE UP PEOPLE!

HEAD-ON. APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD!

Terry July 28, 2008 at 2:47 pm

[re=45558]tsunami[/re]:

Not kill, just make part of his face fall off and necessitate his wearing a partial white mask like the Phantom of the Opera during all public appearances.

That would be way cool.

V572625694 July 28, 2008 at 2:48 pm

[re=45557]Anita Cocktail[/re]: Exactamundo. He’s never paid a dime for health care in his life. Not saying veterans who went through what he did don’t have something coming (something better than a lockdown seance w/Dick Cheney), but he has no knowledge of what it’s like to be a health care consumer. And therefore no credibility on this issue.

Oh, sorry. Forgot to be snarky. Will try to do better.

Cubilista July 28, 2008 at 2:49 pm

while he’s at it, how about removing that giant gouter he calls a left cheek.

Godless Liberal * July 28, 2008 at 2:52 pm

[re=45573]Cubilista[/re]: No can do, that’s where he stores his emergency supply of Geritol.

weirdiowasculpture July 28, 2008 at 2:54 pm

He should have had his jowls drained while he was there.

Buffy and Hildegard July 28, 2008 at 2:55 pm

Soon he’ll just have a little band-aid where his nose used to be and we’ll find him and some pre-teen kid in their pajamas watching the Silver Spoons box set in his ranch bunk house.

Serolf Divad July 28, 2008 at 2:59 pm

This is what McCain will look like when he’s sworn in, after his 60th procedure: ivory soft skin.

4tehlulz July 28, 2008 at 3:01 pm

ABC described it as “mole-like skin”.

This means that WALNUTS had Karl Rove removed from his head, who was spawning, Athena-like, from that great god McCain’s mavericky brain.

AxmxZ July 28, 2008 at 3:05 pm

Another couple of those removals before the debates, and he’ll be on stage looking like a mummy.

Lionel Hutz Esq. July 28, 2008 at 3:14 pm

You have to admit that the McCain camp is brilliant. Obama comes out with “Oh, my hip hurts” to capture the over 70 crowd, and, bam!, McCain comes back with “Yeah, but I have face cancer.” I would expect McCain to spend his next two days making speeches about how the government must get the hell off his lawn.

weirdiowasculpture July 28, 2008 at 3:15 pm

If this poor old incontinent doddering threat to applesauce is still alive by the election, he’ll look like Harvey Dent after Batman saved him from the Joker’s gasoline bomb.

Larry Fine July 28, 2008 at 3:20 pm

Looks like AIDS to me.

TGY July 28, 2008 at 3:29 pm

Pimplegate!

Lionel Hutz Esq. July 28, 2008 at 3:30 pm

Little known fact:

If you map out all of the moles that McCain has had removed, they form the numbers “666.”

ReelectTilden July 28, 2008 at 3:35 pm

72 years old and he still has the complexion of a teenager! WALNUTS will live for A THOUSAND YEARS!

Sussemilch July 28, 2008 at 4:03 pm

Remember, they only explain the ones that are visible. Underneath that suit he’s half bandaids.

ReelectTilden July 28, 2008 at 4:14 pm

Damn, Star Trek: Nemesis would be the perfect movie reference now. If only anyone had seen it…

wallythepug July 28, 2008 at 6:11 pm

[re=45571]V572625694[/re]: Not only the great free medical care, but I’m pretty sure every paycheck WALNUTS! earned in his entire lifetime was from our tax dollars, including the social security checks he now receives.

“WALNUTS!, sucking on the government teat since high school graduation.” I’m Wallythepug and I approve this message.

Anita Cocktail July 28, 2008 at 6:50 pm

[re=45590]Buffy and Hildegard[/re]: [re=45665]ReelectTilden[/re]: I think that’s from the Botox. I mean, my God, the man’s in his seventies and you could bounce quarters off his forehead. That’s just not natural.

Especially when you consider how much he scowls and shakes his fist at those hippie kids.

Anita Cocktail July 28, 2008 at 6:50 pm

[re=45571]V572625694[/re]: You wouldn’t by any chance be The Fonz, would you?

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