• February 13, 2012
WEATHER ALERT

by Sara K. Smith

12:25 pm October 28, 2008

Who would want to rally with this creepy raindrop anyhow?JOHN McCAIN PUSSES OUT ON RAINY RALLY; OBAMA STAYS: Well ladies and gentlemen, that settles it. Your brave war hero John McCain does not want to hold an outdoor rally in the rain in Pennsylvania, while an hour away, Barack Obama the Hawaiian shark god whips a drenched crowd of 9.000 into an orgiastic frenzy. What is wrong with all these terrible hippies, standing in the rain to listen to some guy talk about hope while his teleprompter breaks. [FOX News]

{ 76 comments }

sk1win October 28, 2008 at 12:27 pm

McCain is such a twat. Check out the photos from Hopey’s rally:

http://www.gettyimages.com/Search/Search.aspx?contractUrl=2&language=en-US&family=editorial&assetType=image&ebd=2008-10-27&p=barack%20obama&src=standard#

Old women aren’t afraid of the rain but Walnuts is.

JeffGoldblum October 28, 2008 at 12:29 pm

Whoever controls the weather (the Illuminati) is in the tank.

ManchuCandidate October 28, 2008 at 12:30 pm

Walnuts is still brave, strong, virile and healthy. The reason why Walnuts won’t speak in the rain is because rain melts off his face.

ColdCupofHope October 28, 2008 at 12:30 pm

Obama is able to warm the crowd by reaching out and touching everyone’s heart with his glowing finger of hope… what? That’s E.T. Whateva. Same dif.

WALNUTS! in the meantime, simply doesn’t want the crowd to see his pants wet, because then you would see his Depends.

Ha HA… waterworks.

War Eagle October 28, 2008 at 12:30 pm

Oh, my face is melting! My face is melting?

Cape Clod October 28, 2008 at 12:30 pm

There was the threat that the 30 pounds of makeup McCain normally wears to make himself look human might wash away.

queeraselvis v 2.0 October 28, 2008 at 12:31 pm

WALNUTS! is just afraid that Cindy might melt if she got hit by an errant raindrop.

superfecta October 28, 2008 at 12:33 pm

Obama also held his rally in scary Chester – I don’t think they serve McCain’s kind there.

Dave J. October 28, 2008 at 12:33 pm

OMG, weather=WEATHERMEN??!?!?!!? Why does Bill Ayers use the rain to attack John McCain??

Worlds End October 28, 2008 at 12:33 pm

[re=152423]JeffGoldblum[/re]: Dont forget the greys

Min October 28, 2008 at 12:34 pm

My momma always said we need more Hawaiian shark gods in government.

Worlds End October 28, 2008 at 12:34 pm

Anyone see this they are just scrapping the barrel now.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/10/27/phony-election-flier-in-v_n_138382.html

War Eagle October 28, 2008 at 12:35 pm

Uh, ladies and gents. Seems like we voted and it’s unanimous.

Don’t want his eye shadow to run like Miss Ashley T.

binarian October 28, 2008 at 12:35 pm

[re=152424]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Ah, like the Wicked Witch of the West. Got it.

rmontcal October 28, 2008 at 12:35 pm

9.000?

magic titty October 28, 2008 at 12:36 pm

What the FUCK is that thing!!??

Also, Cindy McCain can’t get wet, or she gets visibly cunty. And NO ONE wants to see that.

Mista Eko October 28, 2008 at 12:36 pm

9.000 people? That’s no orgy, that’s just larger than average group sex.

MathewBrooks October 28, 2008 at 12:36 pm

Obvs the weather is in the tank for Obammmah

lazyb October 28, 2008 at 12:37 pm

Gramps knows he’s going to lose next Tuesday, and losing is even less fun with pneumonia.

SayItWithWookies October 28, 2008 at 12:37 pm

It’s not fair — under Obama’s Canopy of Hope ™ it’s always sunny and 75 degrees.

4tehlulz October 28, 2008 at 12:37 pm

[re=152437]Worlds End[/re]: Pretty standard in Hampton and Virginia Beach, actually.

Dreamer October 28, 2008 at 12:38 pm

I bet you Hopey gained all the undecideds that are fans of “Singing in the Rain.”

Anita Cocktail October 28, 2008 at 12:38 pm

I was at the Chester rally and I think the real reason is denim. Obama looked adorable in his Dad Jeans with his nice, tightly rounded glutes, whereas we all know how awful old men look in blue jeans, what with their colostomy bags and their sagging ass cheeks and all.

mattbolt October 28, 2008 at 12:38 pm

Man, I wanna go to one of these Obama free-love freakout parties. I would SO hook up!

Violenza October 28, 2008 at 12:38 pm

Awwww wet Hawaiian Shark God in jeans and sneaks! So adorable. I cannot get enough.

Itsjustme October 28, 2008 at 12:39 pm

Well, Mom always says “Sugar lumps and shit melts.” Melt on you old Goat!

magic titty October 28, 2008 at 12:40 pm

[re=152422]sk1win[/re]: Go Hopey!

frumious_bandersnatch October 28, 2008 at 12:40 pm

I’m surprised FOX didn’t intercut the dance scenes from Matrix Reloaded…

american mutt October 28, 2008 at 12:41 pm

i wish i were a hawaiian shark god.

Vewol Mevemont October 28, 2008 at 12:42 pm

Rain? I’d be a little bit more worried about the icy, glowing, hand of death reaching through the ether into the center of the crowd.

Violenza October 28, 2008 at 12:44 pm

P.S. I vote yes to a totally grabbable ass.

cal October 28, 2008 at 12:44 pm

More liberal mainstream meterology.

american mutt October 28, 2008 at 12:45 pm

[re=152450]SayItWithWookies[/re]: So true.

MargeSimpsonsBlackFriend October 28, 2008 at 12:46 pm

Hope looks good in leather. A hot president is change I can believe in.

Also, McCain could not be outside in the rain because he would slip and fall like Dole did that one time and we would all laugh like crazy.

Gopherit October 28, 2008 at 12:47 pm

But….but….Barry’s so sweet he must be made of sugar. Why didn’t he melt in the rain? Does it have something to do with unicorns?

nycguy October 28, 2008 at 12:49 pm

Hey—old people have to be careful. They can catch pneumonia if they say out in the rain.

slappypaddy October 28, 2008 at 12:49 pm

[re=152473]Vewol Mevemont[/re]: Death always has a hand out for a handout, hanging around the bitterz too much.

Dave J. October 28, 2008 at 12:51 pm

[re=152487]nycguy[/re]: Walnuts still remembers what happened to his friend William Henry Harrison after he walked in the rain and then died because of the old age and pneumonia and whatnot.

PrairiePossum October 28, 2008 at 12:52 pm

McCain suspended his campaign to rush to the local weather station and solve this rain crisis.

hockeymom October 28, 2008 at 12:52 pm

William Henry Harrison people….never forget!

elcapitan October 28, 2008 at 12:52 pm

That broken teleprompter is the first thing that’s been in the tank for Old Man McCain in weeks.

tootsieroll October 28, 2008 at 12:55 pm

[re=152422]sk1win[/re]: I need a cold shower now.

hockeymom October 28, 2008 at 12:57 pm

[re=152495]Dave J.[/re]: curses…I thought I’d be first with the dead prez reference.
damn that missing T on my laptop.

magic titty October 28, 2008 at 12:57 pm

[re=152422]sk1win[/re]: Seriously, everyone needs to chack out these pictures. They’re all kinds of awesome.

glamourdammerung October 28, 2008 at 12:58 pm

Damned Weathermen.

Hairy Reed October 28, 2008 at 12:59 pm

[re=152442]rmontcal[/re]: Wonkette is already being turned into eurosocialists by Hopey.

PerhapsSo October 28, 2008 at 12:59 pm

It’s snowing here in Pennsylvania right now. Well, not where I am, due to lovely pollutants that keep my inner city toastier than the surrounding area, but I hear from my friends who live farther out in places with trees that it is snowing.

Hairy Reed October 28, 2008 at 1:00 pm

[re=152513]magic titty[/re]: Man, Hopey’s a badass.

slappypaddy October 28, 2008 at 1:01 pm

[re=152497]hockeymom[/re]: He was a war hero, too. Screwed up when he took snakes to cure pneumonia. Didn’t work any more than tossing a few trillion dollars at insolvent banks will cure an economy. But he was a hero.

shortsshortsshorts October 28, 2008 at 1:02 pm

[re=152516]glamourdammerung[/re]: If that is what I think it is, then you have just conquered everything, ever with your comment.

slappypaddy October 28, 2008 at 1:03 pm

[re=152513]magic titty[/re]: Wouldn’t have the same effect if he wore glasses. But glasses are for when he’s Clark Kent.

TeddyS October 28, 2008 at 1:09 pm

McCain steps out into that rain and catches cold, continues to campaign, gets elected, gets pneumonia, dies. President Palin. Mooses stampede to Canada. Evildoers whisper, “Whattaya say, dudes, shall we test her?”

Anonymous Office Zombie October 28, 2008 at 1:10 pm

McCain fears the rain lest he be stricken with a fierce bout of ague and the grippe and suffer the same fate as his old friend William Henry Harrison.

Giant Robot October 28, 2008 at 1:11 pm

[re=152422]sk1win[/re]: Some of the best campaign photos so far. Thanks!

azw88 October 28, 2008 at 1:11 pm

[re=152424]ManchuCandidate[/re]: you mena melt kind of like this guy?

Obama needs not fear the cold…. frozen chocolate is good!

Anonymous Office Zombie October 28, 2008 at 1:12 pm

[re=152495]Dave J.[/re]:
Damnit, I knew I posted too late!

user-of-owls October 28, 2008 at 1:20 pm

McCain/Harrison: Ready to Die on Day One!

StrangelyBrown October 28, 2008 at 1:31 pm

[re=152497]hockeymom[/re]: Who can blame him? If Sarah Palin was my running mate, I wouldn’t be taking any chances either. I’d give all my speeches from a hermetically sealed bunker, with a team of doctors standing by at all times.

Dr. Zoidberg October 28, 2008 at 1:34 pm

Hawaiian shark god….oh, I’ve got a new nickname for Obama!

And it’s so appropriate, seeing as how I have several shark tattoos…this means Hopey and I are destined to be together!

Rush October 28, 2008 at 1:39 pm

The rain just helps further fill the Obama tank so other can continue to join.

Serolf Divad October 28, 2008 at 1:40 pm

A little Obama porn here for the folks at home.

sanantonerose October 28, 2008 at 1:44 pm

[re=152502]elcapitan[/re]: Broken teleprompter didn’t slow Hopey down! He had a plan B, unlike McCain.

yellowdogdem October 28, 2008 at 1:47 pm

Did I actually just read a fair and balanced article about the Obama rally on the Fox News site? Must be hallucinating. Need coffee.

sarahconnor October 28, 2008 at 2:03 pm

Dude that was one of my favorite Grateful Dead shows of all time! Back to back Box of Rain, Rain, Expecting Rain! woot!

sk1win October 28, 2008 at 2:03 pm

I really just posted those photos to dispel that myth that the blacks aren’t scared of water (you know like cats). But I’m glad they were enjoyed (and masturbated to).

user-of-owls October 28, 2008 at 2:09 pm

[re=152597]sanantonerose[/re]: Geez, Rose, be more circumspect. Drudge read your post and has a siren up: “Obama Has Plan-B. Unprotected Sex Scandal?! Developing.”

Botswana Meat Commission FC October 28, 2008 at 2:11 pm

It’s just not “orgiastic” unless everyone leaves drenched.

sezme October 28, 2008 at 2:16 pm

Was that an orgiastic frenzy or an orgastic frenzy? F. Scott Fitzgerald fans demand to know.

Marquis de Maude October 28, 2008 at 3:38 pm

McCain was afraid to stand in the rain as he remembers all to well what happened to his injun-battlin’ war-buddy from Tippecanoe. McCain spent FIVE AND A HALF MOTHERFUCKING years with a cold after standing in the rain listening to William Henry Harrison’s inaugural.

liquiddaddy October 28, 2008 at 4:11 pm

Everyday is soggy for Walnuts. In his pants.

Sasquatch October 28, 2008 at 4:14 pm

$150,000 on clothing for Palin and no one thought to buy a fucking rain coat or umbrella?

sewingmyfish October 28, 2008 at 4:47 pm

[re=152931]Sasquatch[/re]: Palin’s method of sheltering herself from the elements is to climb inside a hollowed out moose carcase.

palmerdawg October 28, 2008 at 6:08 pm

That’s what you get for yelling at clouds, even the clouds are in the tank for Obama.

slinkimalinki October 28, 2008 at 11:27 pm

[re=152422]sk1win[/re]: i like it that they’ve just plain given up on photoshopping out hopey’s halo.

DoktorZoom October 29, 2008 at 12:48 am

McCain in Rain, is Plainly without Gain. (By George, I think I’ve got it!)

TGY October 29, 2008 at 10:54 am

“Serenity is not freedom from the storm but peace within the storm.”
-Unknown

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