MAUREEN DOWD HAS A ZINGER, EVERYBODY: “The bank cloaks itself in a philanthropic glow while wasting our money, acting like the American Cancer Society when in fact it’s a cancer on American society.” See what she did there? And she’s referring to the bank Northern Trust, which she nicknames — wait for it — “Northern No Trust.” Since when can we not trust cancer? [NYT]
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{ 40 comments }
Wait’ll she hears about the nickname I came up with for Hillary Clinton. HITLERy Clinton, GET IT??!1?!?!
How much botox went into the photo in NYT compared to this one?
$1000 worth?
HEY-YO!111@!!~!!
She is awful. Sorry to people who disagree. SHE. IS. AWFUL. Therefore perfect for the NYT.
[re=252472]Bruno[/re]: Seriously, though, I know this isn’t Jezebel or anything but What IS With That Hair?
Fuck, I’m agreeing with MoDo?
““They think of themselves as kings and queens,” he said. And they’re not ready to abdicate. ”
No, but neither did Louis XVI and Nicholas II.
Is it just me, or does she look nothing at all like the sad pomo-lit professor barbie whose picture is beside all of her times op-eds?
I, too, cloaked myself in a philanthropic glow. I s-l-o-w-l-y opened the cloak.
The police responded a bit more quickly.
Oh no she didn’t!
Oh, I love your critique of Derrida. Come on upstairs, I’ve got some Chai Latte and a Gypsy Kings CD.
(That’s what her NYTimes photo is saying. You’d think by now she’d have other places to look for dates.)
(Sorry if I offended anybody here -)
I think the ethical thing for Sheryl Crow to do now is give me some CDs in exchange for her illgotten gains.
“They think of themselves as kings and queens,”
So did Larry Craig.
…the bank put out a letter noting that it “did not seek the government’s investment” even though it took it…
Wait — so the government forced money on a poor, hapless bank? Christ, I’ve been doing it wrong, apparently.
Wow, she reported that the party that the bank threw included a “concert by Chicago (at a $100,000 fee)”. Things are bad when an entire city will perform for less than $.04 per citizen.
[re=252485]SayItWithWookies[/re]:
It’s the bankers version of the rapist defense aka “Blame the victim.”
The two nice things about her picture;
1.) we can see that, admirably, she donated her eyebrows to charity years ago
and
2.) she’s of the class of women whose nose is going to keep growing well into old age, like an out-of-control cauliflower, and eventually crowd out her whole face.
Why does she look like Arianna Huffington on meth in that pic?
[re=252488]GreyPanter[/re]:
That’s outrageous… Chicago isn’t worth more than $250.00 plus half the cover (after the bar bill is subtracted, of course).
98% of all puns suck. Does she not know this?
You know, if the Times wanted to save money and itself they might consider laying off Madame Dowd. Then she’d really have some insight on this dastardly economic crisis.
Oh, MoDo, those likes were so much better when you were MILFy.
Mo and Peggington Noonington need to have a hair pulling, knock down, bitch slappin’ to determine whom of the two is the most pretentious…
[re=252474]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Maureen Dowd is…dowdy Maureen; a Times columnist with a column for our times.
There, kan i haz NYT rightz gig nd moar money now?
Dowdy Dowd Dow
Paying Chicago $100,000 for a concert is probably the most distressing thing in the article. Was Air Supply not available?
We haven’t forgotten the crappy treatment Al Gore received at your hands, Maureen, on the eve of the 2000 general elections! There are no more “practically lactating” jokes left in our reserve of good will for you, Maureen. That you are soaking up one of the NYT op-ed slots for your notionally liberal columns, so you can fart out your little Bill-and-Hillary anecdotes (or mostly just suppositions), while the Times stocks the other half of the page with asps and vipers like Kristol Meh and David tie-me-up-in-pink Brooks, is inexcusable!
There’s a page for what you do, Maureen, the gossip page.
Whatever Happened to Baby MoDo?
First you liberal media pawns say “Stimulate the economy!!!” Then when we do do, you get all huffy. Hellwitcha.
Ha, ha! This has inspired me to start calling Citibank “Crookedbank!”
NOBODY TAKE THIS BECAUSE IT’S MY BON MOT AND I’M COPYRIGHTING IT.
Christ, I’m clever.
Well, it’s true she could use a few classes in the ‘Taint of TruckNutz’ school of humor.
More like BORE-reen Dowd.
~Adam Sandler
I’m personally giving her a pass because fewer things are sadder than the plight of the Formerly Bangable.
“Northern No Trust” …well someone’s getting the the game of meme-ing
Mr Denby devoted an entire chapter to Dowd’s brand of snark. I think both of ‘em ought to be slapped silly with some pale blue TruckNutz.
Michael Douglas used to date his mom? WEIRD!
A pity. She’s hit the wall…
Forget about MoDo. I have something to say to Cheryl Crow:
I know a lot of musicians. When they are not on stage most of them are too spaced to do anything except diddle on their guitars unplugged and slurp beer. You were supposed to be different. Being a Democrat. Working for Hopey. LECTURING ME about how much toilet paper I use! And then you’re going to play for these GRAVE ROBBERS?????? You are dead to me, bitch. I will never spend another dime on you. And if you don’t believe it, ask Jackson Browne. I divorced him ON PRINCIPLE and all he did was beat up Darryl Hannah, whom I don’t even like. So you got $100,000, but you lost my $14.95. So there.
The American Cancer Society/cancer on American society is a near classic Dowdversion® and she puts at least one in every column and sometimes as many as a half dozen. When you have a trademark schtick you have to stick with it. And you haters are just jealous you didn’t think of it. And you’d hit it just for the bragging rights. You know you would.
[re=252510]snideinplainsight[/re]: Yes!!! Thank you!!!
[re=252545]Larry McAwful[/re]: This has inspired me to start calling Citibank “Crookedbank!”
Oh you think you’re so clever. I call rights to…get this…SHITTY BANK!!!11!!!
I AM FUCKING GENIUS IN HUMAN FORM. HA ha ha ha ha Shitty Bank. Get it? Citi Bank = Shitty Bank? Because it’s a shitty bank, right? Huh?
Maureen Dowd is personally responsible for 8 years of W due to her constant lying about Al Gore who apparently declined to fuck her in the broom closet at an xmas party sometime in the ’70s. SHE IS PERSONALLY TO BLAME FOR ALL OUR SORROWS.
[re=252831]Jukesgrrl[/re]: You spent money on her albums before? Bwah!
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