• February 13, 2012
  • RUSH LIMBAUGH SCOOP: OBAMA WILL POISON YOUR ANUS: Gordon Brown if you are out there on the Internet we must pass along Rush Limbaugh’s very important safety warning about the dangers of poison anal fucking: “But the slobbering [over Barack Obama], the slobbering… this guy, folks I’m telling ya, if he keeps this up throughout the G20, Gordon Brown will come down with anal poisoning and may die from it.” Maybe he can walk us through the mechanics of this on tomorrow’s show. [HuffPo]

{ 64 comments }

danadevin85 April 1, 2009 at 3:45 pm

is it me or does Rush seem to be obsessed with the word anus?

Serolf Divad April 1, 2009 at 3:47 pm

Thanks for letting us know, Mr. anal cyst.

SayItWithWookies April 1, 2009 at 3:47 pm

Projecting toxic asshole says ‘what?’

nmmagayar April 1, 2009 at 3:48 pm

[re=278768]danadevin85[/re]: specifically, buttsecks

ihasasad April 1, 2009 at 3:48 pm

Rush didn’t want to say ‘brown noser’ because that could be seen as a bit racist.

Doglessliberal April 1, 2009 at 3:48 pm

[re=278768]danadevin85[/re]: you beat me to it. I was going to take a broader position, however, and note that many right-wing and conservative types seem fixated on anal sex.

Hooray For Anything April 1, 2009 at 3:48 pm

If anyone would know about the after effects of people having to kiss someone’s ass, Limbaugh would know

Monsieur Grumpe April 1, 2009 at 3:50 pm

Rush’s heavy breathing made me lose my lunch. Not that it was a good lunch. You owe me one Egg McMuffin Jim.

BklynIlluminati April 1, 2009 at 3:51 pm

Rush is so deep in the closet that he is playing dress up with his mom’s pumps.

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 1, 2009 at 3:52 pm

Well, who better to know from anuses than a piece of shit?

stink, but April 1, 2009 at 3:52 pm

that’s just what the right-wing crowd is calling AIDS these days

norbizness April 1, 2009 at 3:54 pm

Some see this as a malicious dig at our President, but the somber tone puts one more in mind of a experience-laden and/or court-ordered public service announcement.

El Pinche April 1, 2009 at 3:54 pm

More anal and scat references…whatever happened to his hunt for a beastial lover and a cleveland steamer (female listener summit, or whatever) ? Would somebody just take a shit in his mouth to END THIS MADNESS!

Hart88 April 1, 2009 at 3:55 pm

FINALLY some ass-fucking around here!

IwillemergeVictorious April 1, 2009 at 3:55 pm

Taint no such thing as anal poisonin’.

Texan Bulldoggette April 1, 2009 at 3:55 pm

Sounds like someone’s jealous. Could Rush be suffering from anus envy??

StripesAndPlaids April 1, 2009 at 3:57 pm

The sad thing is all the morons who will agree with it, repeat it, and feel really clever when they do it.

frumious_bandersnatch April 1, 2009 at 3:58 pm

I’d offer to illuminate him, but the slash community has enough damn problems right now.

StripesAndPlaids April 1, 2009 at 3:58 pm

Oh yeah, and Rush is a douche.

Fox n Fiends April 1, 2009 at 3:58 pm

Rush + Anal = a Brown Gordon

stolichnayaaa April 1, 2009 at 4:01 pm

I love life so goddamn much right now. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, I am working from home, and the steam-powered laundry mangler that is the Republican party is busily tearing itself apart. Nothing could be finer than to listen to this junkie and his whole coterie of useless, ineffectual, impotent closeted douchenozzles choke and flail and scream and cry about the impossible hole they find themselves in.

Ain’t nobody gonna break-a my stride…

PortlandSmartAss April 1, 2009 at 4:01 pm

What sort of addictive prescription medication do you think Rush would recommend to deal with toxic exposure?

american mutt April 1, 2009 at 4:02 pm

did this guy just hump the shark?

TGY April 1, 2009 at 4:03 pm

That makes no sense even as an insult!

shortsshortsshorts April 1, 2009 at 4:03 pm

Shoving oxicontin up your ass will do the same thing, Rush.

chascates April 1, 2009 at 4:04 pm

El Rushbo has a whale of an anal compulsion.

Mr Blifil April 1, 2009 at 4:06 pm

“Rim” shot!

ForTheTurnstiles April 1, 2009 at 4:08 pm

The children saw the eye as a sign from God, descending from the sky
It was alright to dream on Buckingham Green

(stuck in my head all fucking day long now)

queeraselvis v 2.0 April 1, 2009 at 4:08 pm

[re=278815]PortlandSmartAss[/re]: A cyanide coated suppository. No, I take that back. TWO suppositories, in the case the first one doesn’t work.

Decker April 1, 2009 at 4:08 pm

But I thought it was butt-poisoning that saved Rush from the Vietnam? Is it now a bad thing?

ihasasad April 1, 2009 at 4:10 pm

Speaking of butts and poison and men and stupid stuff:

Obama’s ‘The Beast’ is a little butt-baby compared to Medvedev’s dream of a car:

“Hippopotamus” as the vehicle is affectionately called “weighs 16 tons and has been designed to withstand a small nuclear attack”

So there! Suck it brother!

[http://www.moscowtimes.ru/article/600/42/375822.htm]

Kev-O-Tron April 1, 2009 at 4:13 pm

Rush Limbaugh merely poisons your soul.

grevillea April 1, 2009 at 4:14 pm

Wow, even the Pope knows that ain’t how you get anal poisoning…

Doglessliberal April 1, 2009 at 4:15 pm

[re=278831]ihasasad[/re]: yeah, but what kind of rims does it have, huh?

RoscoePColtraine April 1, 2009 at 4:16 pm

Rush is jealous. He couldn’t get a dose of anal poisoning himself last month.

Red Zeppelin April 1, 2009 at 4:19 pm

OK, understand teh buttsecks reference, not quite so sure on the “poisoning” part, unless it has something to do with Barry’s member being somehow toxic. Related to race, maybe? Just a guess.

burton judson April 1, 2009 at 4:24 pm

I’m starting to think there might be something wrong with that guy.

gurukalehuru April 1, 2009 at 4:25 pm

Oh, I get it. Gordon BROWN. Rush, you’re a fucking genius.

Mr Blifil April 1, 2009 at 4:30 pm

Oh and plus, Mr. Ass Boil has his own stupid rhetorical device backward, as the slobberer would be the one in contact with the other dude’s anus, hence it is implausible in the extreme to conclude that the slobberer would contract “ass poisoning” as the slobberer probably has not been provided the opportunity to have his/her own ass slobbered upon. It only makes sense if the slobberee comes down with anal poisoning, since he or she is the only person in the scenario whose anus is exposed to possible contact with antigens.

Thank you.

stew April 1, 2009 at 4:33 pm

More rectal fixating from Rush. Time for another drug test, Miami police guys.

grevillea April 1, 2009 at 4:36 pm

[re=278877]Mr Blifil[/re]: Maybe some kind of diagram would help? Words in circles mysteriously connected with lines, perhaps?

MarSF April 1, 2009 at 4:38 pm

[re=278813]stolichnayaaa[/re]: I am in total agreement. These assholes are debating who would be a better headliner for their shitty GOP dinner party- Gingrich or Palin!

I mean, COME ON.

MarSF April 1, 2009 at 4:42 pm

I hear that Rush goes down to the Dominican Republic when he wants to poison some anus. But at least he pays cash to do it.

S.Luggo April 1, 2009 at 4:50 pm

[re=278877]Mr Blifil[/re]: Rush wanted to say “sperm breath”, but he gets choked up whenever he thinks of sperm.

bitchincamaro April 1, 2009 at 4:53 pm

[re=278772]Serolf Divad[/re]: I love those urban myth sites; usually they’re debunking the wackiest shit, but in Rush’s case, it’s all true. Ha! Good dig, sir.

Numbat Dundee April 1, 2009 at 4:55 pm

The role played by sodomy in high diplomacy has long been acknowledged. Bismark famously poisoned Disraeli’s anus at the Congress of Berlin. Metternich’s sphincter was widely praised. As for Kissinger…

Sussemilch April 1, 2009 at 4:58 pm

It’s the levels of affection, in the male Republican mind.
A – kill each other
B – say “hey” or “sup” at the water cooler
C – engage in a business relationship, go hunting together
D – assfucking

So if you show more affection than holding someone’s rifle when they whiz in the woods, you’re doing the stinky pinkie. Rush says so.

Holding Out for a Hero April 1, 2009 at 5:03 pm

[re=278785]BklynIlluminati[/re]: Most of the Republican party is so far in the closet, that they can see Narnia.

facehead April 1, 2009 at 5:10 pm

Damn bleeding anus liberals …

smartypants April 1, 2009 at 5:43 pm

Phobic. Beyond. All. Belief.

angryhippopotamus April 1, 2009 at 5:52 pm

[re=278863]gurukalehuru[/re]: Clearly Rush is just fucking with us. http://xkcd.com/559/

Scandalabra April 1, 2009 at 6:11 pm

Rush knows about anal poisoning from the time that Dominican tranny accidentally shoved a set of unsterilized Ben-Wa balls up his ass, and then lost the string.

Nita April 1, 2009 at 6:23 pm

Holy crap!

comradepaulson April 1, 2009 at 7:33 pm

Rush, you’re the only person anyone gets the “anal poisoning” from. This is because your ass is huge. Really, it is huge and it smells like a dead raccoon that’s been left in the sun for ten days and farted on by donkeys. If anyone gets near your ass, they retch, develop cold sweats, see spots, lose clumps of hair, and eventually develop plague-like symptoms and die. I can see that you are confused and you project your poison ass to other people. But really… it is only your ass that kills people.

That is all.

Toomush Infermashun April 1, 2009 at 7:36 pm

….”slobbering…anal poisoning…” some folks just can’t help talking about themselves all the time….he must be drunk…(oh, that’s me)…

problemwithcaring April 1, 2009 at 7:43 pm

[re=278772]Serolf Divad[/re]: Ew. Ingrown ass-hair. That’s some nasty shit.

smellyal8r April 1, 2009 at 8:23 pm

Who thinks this crap up? Rush is just too bizarre any more. I mean in the old days, he was kinda provocative, but Obama gives you anal poisoning? Who thinks about that all day. I guess Rush won’t be quitting any time soon, but at his weight, maybe he’ll die on the air, but I imagine it will be by fat poisoning.

Neilist April 1, 2009 at 9:01 pm

Sometimes you people really appall me.

A world-renowed EXPERT on “anal poisoning” shares his knowledge and experience, and all you can do is mock.

Sad.

Really sad.

Sort of like the Wonkette version of the Bush Administration’s approach to the National Academy of Sciences . . . .

liquiddaddy April 1, 2009 at 9:52 pm

For some reason, all I can think about is the Queen of England.

stolichnayaaa April 2, 2009 at 1:17 am

Ha, just listened to the clip.

“PMSNBC”! Oh snap! You must be this tall to ride the LOLercoaster!

Rush Limbaugh, you are the living end.

lulzmonger April 2, 2009 at 3:06 am

Almost listened to the audio, but then out of the blue my IQ kicked in.

He’s the Mr. Creosote of stupid – one’s only hope is to be out of his range, or hiding behind a potted plant. Neural scabies incarnate … I’d rather listen to a bone-saw.

assistant/atlas April 2, 2009 at 3:09 am

Paraphrasing Barney Frank:

This guy talks more about gay sex than any gay guy I know.

sewingmyfish April 2, 2009 at 4:40 pm

So Rush thinks that Obama kissing Brown’s ass will…poison brown?
Does he think black people have venom?

Chuckie Jesus April 3, 2009 at 10:46 pm

INJECTED WITH A POISON!!!

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