EXCITING NEW PROFILE OF THAT CONGRESSMAN MEGHAN McCAIN WANTED TO BONE: “Schock is ardently opposed to abortion and gay marriage—and he’s got the requisite scorn for Big Government. … Once you get past the likes and mans and you knows, the future of the GOP doesn’t sound all that different from the past.” Sexy! [Details]
Previous post: Obama Naked In Boston!
Next post: Mysterious ACORN Protest Sign Raises More Questions Than It Answers
{ 58 comments }
He hates the gays, huh? Here’s a little slice o’ joy from that Details article:
Schock is hoping his romantic prospects will improve too, once he settles in. He’s the only one of his siblings not married with children, and is similarly an outlier among his friends. “I had a group of five or six guys, and we hung out and traveled—ski trips and stuff,” he says.
Hmmm. Well. Also. Microtrends.
Damn, that’s an ugly tie.
[re=290083]loquaciousmusic[/re]: Butterstick, also, nom nom nom.
“Mary, Kill, Fuck, in that order.”
HOLY HELL that puts a lot of things into perspective.
He’ll be revealed in Bachman’s office in a dog collar in 3…..2…..1
Poor Meghan. Another prospective bedmate plays for the other team.
Schock is hoping his romantic prospects will improve too, once he settles in. He’s the only one of his siblings not married with children, and is similarly an outlier among his friends. “I had a group of five or six guys, and we hung out and traveled—ski trips and stuff,” he says.
(Nods knowingly)
Once you get past the likes and mans and you knows, the future of the GOP doesn’t sound all that different from the past.
Yeah, the future of the GOP sounds similar, but more… er… exclusive.
He looks short.
Give that boy a prefrontal lobotomy and I’ll fuck him till the cows come home.
Put a bottle in front of me and I’ll do the same.
Does he shave his chest or is he naturally trying to get us to wonder if he shaves his chest?
That’s why party leaders are desperate to bring the conservative message to, as GOP chairman Michael Steele has put it, “urban-suburban hip-hop settings” and anywhere else the elusive youth vote might be hiding.
Sayeth the Schock: “You keep checking the suburbs, Mike. I’ll keep looking in this closet.”
[re=290106]Custerwolf[/re]: Goddamnit, now I keep sliding off my chair.
Damn, I would fvck the GOP right out of him. It might take a couple of days though, but I’m willing to go undercovers for the cause.
Why jump into the GOP so soon? His future boyfriends won’t be born for decades yet.
Went to that Details article and, notwithstanding the general fugliness of the Website, never have I wanted less to “Click here for more.”
All of which makes Schock, hailed as a “bright, young rising star” by House minority whip Eric Cantor, the newbie to watch
And if anyone knows politics, it’s Eric Cantor.
Meghan can’t have him until he has a disabled wife. It’s in her genes.
But is he a Teabagger?
[re=290083]loquaciousmusic[/re]: The “stuff” he so casually included with “ski” was clearly unprotected man-sex in the showers of the local YMCA.
[re=290124]InsidiousTuna[/re]: -er and -ee, though possibly not in that order.
Gotta love that subtle irony: he’s got the requisite scorn against Big Government, except for criminalizing medical procedures and telling consenting adults who can marry. Oh, and allowing near-despot powers for the executive, so long as the executive is a white guy.
[re=290109]Tommy Says Soooo, Jugdish![/re]: Some guys (such as myself) are just naturally deficient in that area.
My own seckseh wifey has more chest hair than I do. Of course, she’s one of those swarthy Messicans.
4tehlulz: And if anybody knows rising, it’s Larry Craig.
[re=290100]Serolf Divad[/re]:
We always knew that LNS was the future of the GOP.
I have no idea why anyone would think this guy likes guys.
ALMOST AS SOON AS HE WON his congressional seat, Schock threw himself into house-hunting in D.C. While he likes music (“everything from Keith Urban to Justin Timberlake to Rihanna”)
Oh.
Is he secretly gay because he’s an R or is he an R because he’s secretly gay?
But does he give the Shocker?
[re=290136]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: It’s NOT a deficiency. Me likey.
[re=290097]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I feel her pain. Guess I should have actually read the article instead of just swooning over the pictorial.
[re=290103]Custerwolf[/re]: The boys had a “Hawt v. Stupid” debate yesterday re. Dana Perlino. It will be good to see what the Wonkette-ettes have to say.
Actually, the last time I saw a look like that, it was on a person in a slicker swinging an axe and/or sweating it out over the superiority of his associates’ business cards.
[re=290149]Custerwolf[/re]: Then I’m sure you grooved on the hairless Carrot Top pic we finally got rid of…muscles galore!
[re=290151]shanemacgowan[/re]: Okay, I did some quick research (Google Images) and he’s definitely gay. Why did Details only publish the pictures of a face I could actually sit on?
[re=290151]shanemacgowan[/re]: I’m gonna have to go with the ‘hawt and stupid are mutually exclusive’ crowd. Although… come to think of it… maybe it comes full circle when he’s stupid enough to be talked into just about anything…
[re=290155]Tommy Says Soooo, Jugdish![/re]: I hate oversized muscles. I’ve found them to be the foolproof indicator of sexual inadequacy and a small pecker.
[re=290161]Custerwolf[/re]: It’s okay if he’s small, cause I bet he’s a bttm anyways.
If you click on the slide show in the article til the very end, you learn that Ronald Reagan was in movies titled Girls on Probation (“The Sensation of the Hour!”) and … WAIT FOR IT … The Amazing Dr. Clitterhouse. The universe is a strange and wonderful place.
Meghan doesn’t mind if Schock is gay — she’s saving herself for daddy.
[re=290136]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: He’s got pretty hairy legs in that picture, I imagine he probably waxes.
then remembers to apologize for his tardiness.
Paultard! Teabagger! STOOPID!
[re=290158]greensprout[/re]: Hawt and stupid are most definitely NOT mutally exclusive. Long ago I had a boyfriend who was a living fucking god (the first time I saw Bradd Pitt’s pic in ‘A River Runs Through It’ I told my cousin, that looks just like Ron, only not as cute”). And he was dumber (and sweeter) than a box of rocks. I can only imagine it came as the result of having his ever-loving brains fucked out. Good times.
News Flash! White House is being evacuated because of tea bags being thrown at the White House! Send your correspondents over to the White House to get pics of people fleeing the children’s characters & tea!
[re=290161]Custerwolf[/re]: Keep Newell out of this.
[re=290151]shanemacgowan[/re]: A boy can be hawt and stupid, definitely. They aren’t good for relationships, but can be excellent for fucking. I can’t think of the Schocker as hawt, though, since he’s so clearly playing for the other team.
[re=290166]Norbert[/re]: I believe that The Amazing Dr. Clitterhouse was remade a few years ago as “House of Clits.” I believe it starred Laura Leighton.
I don’t understand the simultaneous comparisons of him looking like both Jim from the Office and Neil Patrick Harris. I actually think the latter is rather accurate, but Jim from the Office? Besides the fact they are both white guys around the same age with ancestors who probably came from the same part of the world, resulting in them looking not entirely dissimilar, I’d have to say a big no to that comparison. What do others think?
[re=290168]Gallowglass[/re]: Exactly. Those knees are way too hairy to go with such a shiny-smooth chest. Dude’s a vain-ass closet gorilla.
And while stupid and hot can go together quite nicely, homophobic LNS types are just not fuckworthy. With so many reasonably attractive fish in the sea, why fuck a douche?
[re=290197]CorkPopper[/re]: Actually, it’s worked out pretty well in my case. I’ve been in a 12 year relationship with a wonderful man who is virtually retarded. We rarely get in any serious arguments because he doesn’t know the meaning of half of what I say, and he can’t spell good enough to look anything up in the dictionary. The last time I lost it on him, I screamed, “Well, if you weren’t so goddamned illiterate!!” Poor guy looked completely crestfallen and in a low voice asked me, “What does illiterate mean?” True story. That’s why I love the guy. That and he fucks like a wolverine. Now there’s some compensating I can live with.
[re=290202]Vartan84[/re]: Doogie Howser? Yes. Jim? No.
[re=290224]Custerwolf[/re]: Well if it’s working for you, hey, congrats. I mean that in a completely sincere and non-snarky way. I, however, find dumb people boring and have difficulty being around them for any significant amount of time. Hubby is smart and a beast in bed. No money, though (jazz musician). I guess we all have to pick our priorities.
[re=290136]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Could be a late bloomer, too. I had, like, three chest hairs when I was 29. 18 years later, I’m practically a bear.
[re=290276]CorkPopper[/re]: Here’s the thing – Joe makes me laugh NONstop. Honest to god. He’s the most lighthearted individual I know. No pretense, no affectation, no guile. He’s an original. There’s a freshness and a uniqueness that comes from having no rehearsed repertoire. He’s a zen master and he doesn’t even know it.
It’d be nice if he were a jazz musician though.
He doesn’t like gay marriage?
Guess he just likes to get nailed by a new leather daddy every Saturday night?
[re=290197]CorkPopper[/re]: My friends and I had a name for “hawt-but-stoopids.”
Lava Lamps: Pretty to look at but not all that bright…
[re=290098]Dave J.[/re]: Anyone ever see any of the Madtv skits on Abercrombie and the guys that work there?
Yeah.
[re=290709]Cranky Little Camperette[/re]: I still say there’s nothing inherently sexy about an intellect. Many intelligent men have charisma – and THAT is the flame that attracts – not the fact that they know all kinds of things. If knowledge were in itself sexy I’m pretty sure they’d start selling dildo-shaped encyclopedias. Since knowledge equals power in the minds of many, I guess it goes back to just plain old wanting a big strong man.
Comments on this entry are closed.