• February 13, 2012
GATHER YE ROUND

by Jim Newell

3:39 pm June 9, 2009

PUBLIC EXECUTION: We warned “Miller” never to show his link-whoring fraud face around here again, but he did anyway, and now he is banned permanently & forever. Boo Miller! Miller’s the worst!

{ 59 comments }

Udargo June 9, 2009 at 3:44 pm

Am I really making the first comment, or is this some sort of trap?

Jim Newell June 9, 2009 at 3:46 pm

There is no trap. Feel free to comment, kiddies! Tell your stories about Miller.

InsidiousTuna June 9, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Hooray!

http://www.myshittyblog.trucknutz.also

CivicHoliday June 9, 2009 at 3:47 pm

Don’t whore links, whore minks. (for their beautiful beautiful coats)

mattbolt June 9, 2009 at 3:47 pm

His rotting body shall remain hanged from the gallows in the Wonkette town square for a week, as both a reminder and a warning to the townspeople, until finally he is buried, where, per his request, the only memorial on his tombstone will be a link to his Blogspot account.

queeraselvis v 2.0 June 9, 2009 at 3:48 pm

I have my peck of deliciously teeming, overripe tomatoes just aching to be hurled. To the gallows!

orange June 9, 2009 at 3:48 pm

At least he wasn’t a blacksmith.

tunamelt June 9, 2009 at 3:49 pm

Can we dance on the flaming ashes of his body?

Noodle Salad June 9, 2009 at 3:49 pm

My only regret is that I have but one sockpuppet to give for my geocities page.

BlueStateLibtard June 9, 2009 at 3:51 pm

[re=335031]InsidiousTuna[/re]: You’re link’s dead. All’s I get is: “Did You Mean: My Shitty Blog Truck Nutz Also”

Texan Bulldoggette June 9, 2009 at 3:52 pm

Sorry, but he still wasn’t 1/100th as annoying as she-who-shall-not-be named. But, yeah, the link whoring was annoying. Imagine my surprise to learn that Wonkette has SOME standards!

Cape Clod June 9, 2009 at 3:52 pm

Thank goodness you got rid of that whoring, insidious slut.
Who are we talking about again?
Kill him!

Godless Liberal June 9, 2009 at 3:53 pm

Really now, would it have been that much better for him to have emailed the tips line every time he made a comment?

51dimes June 9, 2009 at 3:53 pm

Can we do that over? I hadn’t gotten the rotten tomatoes ready yet.

Boojum June 9, 2009 at 3:54 pm

[re=335045]BlueStateLibtard[/re]: Um, stoopid dude. Yeah, you. Not so much with the smarts, huh?

Naked Bunny with a Whip June 9, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Does this mean I can now link to my Flickr page, so everyone can see more pictures of my ass? Please? No? Goddamn it. Jim just wants everyone’s eyes on his ass.

Mmm.

What were we talking about again?

bologna_wallet June 9, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Hilarious! More blogs need public executions.

Boojum June 9, 2009 at 3:56 pm

So, now that Milfer is gone, can we have more ass fucking, please? For Jesus?

Judas Peckerwood June 9, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Burning? Stoning?

freakishlystrong June 9, 2009 at 3:57 pm

[re=335031]InsidiousTuna[/re]: Please, let’s all chip in and buy this url we can rant and cuss and talk about buttsecks and..oh, wait, we do that here. Carry on.

WickedWitch June 9, 2009 at 3:57 pm

[re=335030]Jim Newell[/re]: Excellent. I’ll be right over with my whip.

rereridiculous June 9, 2009 at 3:58 pm

I’ve been kinda desensitized over the past 8 years. Can we take him to Gitmo instead when it’s free?

memzilla June 9, 2009 at 4:00 pm

Be sure to autoclave the banhammer after every use. Link whores always have STDs.

Lord Growing June 9, 2009 at 4:01 pm

Ahh. Haven’t felt this good since I saw Captain Wirz’s sorry Swiss ass a-swingin’ from the gallis pole.

user-of-owls June 9, 2009 at 4:03 pm

[re=335049]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: Amen, sister. I don’t think Mssr. Newell hanged her, though. Pretty sure he went with the more appropriate “shot from a helicopter” method.

user-of-owls June 9, 2009 at 4:07 pm

Hey, here’s an idea. Next time someone is scheduled for execution, could we have a Nuremberg-style thread/trial (no testimony from the defendant permitted) where everyone could recount the crimes committed by the reprobate in question? Kind of like a Truth and Annihilation Committee. Imagine the hijinks!

rev_matt_y June 9, 2009 at 4:11 pm

Unrelated, but I thought I should mention that on Wait Wait this weekend they noted that the new GM strategy for “Real American Cars” was to buy a bunch of used late model Hondas and outfit them with TruckNutz.

norbizness June 9, 2009 at 4:18 pm

One edict enforced, 1294 to go.

MathewBrooks June 9, 2009 at 4:18 pm

[re=335100]rev_matt_y[/re]: Unrelated comments are also grounds for EXECUTION! Quickly, Self-immolate before they DEFENESTRATE you!

Double Scorpion June 9, 2009 at 4:19 pm

We would have all such commenters so cut off: and we give express charge, that in our marches through the intartubes, there be no links whored from the posts, no pageviews stolen but earned, none of the Editors upbraided or abused in wordy disdainful comments. For when snarky and pompous play for a website, the funnier gamester is the soonest winner of the day.

Min June 9, 2009 at 4:22 pm

I find myself on the horns of a dilemma. I am fundamentally opposed to the death penalty, but, you know, that guy had it coming.

Lascauxcaveman June 9, 2009 at 4:23 pm

[re=335060]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: I think as long as your ass brings the funny, or is somewhat related to the post on which you’re planning to link the pictures of said ass (“This is my ass which was penetrated by a Bohener last night” etc.), the editors will take a condoning view of said ass.

Lionel Hutz Esq. June 9, 2009 at 4:31 pm

[re=335060]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: I believe we were talking about your ass and pictures of your ass…., please go on.

Cape Clod June 9, 2009 at 4:33 pm

[re=335124]Min[/re]: I am against the death penalty too, but in this case hanging is too good for him. I say cut off his head and pee down his neck.

jon c June 9, 2009 at 4:34 pm

Somewhere, Shirley Jackson is smiling.

Sunfire June 9, 2009 at 4:36 pm

Why I was just blogging about public bannings on the internet! Here, let me link to it for you…

Mad Farmer Manifest June 9, 2009 at 4:55 pm

[re=335063]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: I’m up for some celebratory stoning. But not with rocks.

bhosp June 9, 2009 at 4:56 pm

Do we take nominations for the Comment of the Day thing? Can I nominate this ?

Inadequate Blackmail June 9, 2009 at 4:59 pm

So… was he link whoring again? Or did we just hang him for past crimes?

WIDTAP June 9, 2009 at 5:08 pm

I Jim and Ken were supposed to be afraid to ban the blog whores, because then the blog whores would be in here in America, or something.

Pat Pending June 9, 2009 at 5:08 pm

Personally, I love a nice drawing and quartering, preceded by a spin or two on the catherine wheel. I’m old-fashioned like that.

WIDTAP June 9, 2009 at 5:08 pm

I thought Jim and Ken….

RoscoePColtraine June 9, 2009 at 5:15 pm

a la “Augustus Gloop Goes Up The Pipe”

S.Luggo June 9, 2009 at 5:19 pm

Gallows? Looks like a man-date auction wit’ only the mens bidding. Oh, yeah. Newell.

BlueStateLibtard June 9, 2009 at 5:19 pm

[re=335057]Boojum[/re]: Dude, check on your own limited smarts if you think I was being serious with you.

Mr Blifil June 9, 2009 at 5:28 pm

I was hoping for something along the lines of that movie The Crays.

Boojum June 9, 2009 at 5:44 pm

[re=335214]BlueStateLibtard[/re]: Dude, wha? Smarts? Elite arugula something? BLOG WHORE! KILL! YAY!!!

Joshua Norton June 9, 2009 at 5:48 pm

Hmm. I was going in a whole different direction with what I thought link whoring was.

bitchincamaro June 9, 2009 at 5:53 pm

Can I have his avatar?

Red Zeppelin June 9, 2009 at 6:34 pm

How many whore diamonds does he get? Can I have them now that he’s dead?

nestor June 9, 2009 at 6:46 pm

Can’t wait for that Pumpernickel bitch to come back.

snowg00n June 9, 2009 at 7:34 pm

[re=335294]Red Zeppelin[/re]: if you want to sift through his smoldering ashes for the whore diamonds, you got dibs.

qaf June 9, 2009 at 8:02 pm

[re=335194]WIDTAP[/re]: We’ve got to fight them over there so we can fight them over here. Or something.

Deepthroat June 9, 2009 at 8:35 pm

I just wanted to say that I’m sorry.

proudgrampa June 9, 2009 at 10:02 pm

WTF?

Darehead June 9, 2009 at 10:49 pm

We could enjoy his suffering longer if you put him in the pillory. Millory?

blogslut June 9, 2009 at 10:56 pm

[re=335031]InsidiousTuna[/re]: I shall be giggling out loud, all night, thanks to you.

agentstinky June 9, 2009 at 11:38 pm

Wow I sure am glad that link-whoring sonofabitch is finally gone!

…

http://thesebastards.blogspot.com

joeybrill June 10, 2009 at 12:51 am

Is he dead yet? You could kill him again just to be safe, you know.

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