• February 12, 2012
WEAR GREEN WHILE WATCHING THIS ON TEEVEE

by Jim Newell

3:25 pm June 15, 2009

  • OBAMA TO TALK IRAN, MAYBE, LATER: Barack Obama is scheduled to hold a press conference with Italy’s leathery clown king, Silvio Berlusconi, at 5 p.m. today, to discuss Stuff. In other words, a bunch of reporters will harass him about Iran. His options are to either declare war on Iran or allow John McCain and Andrew Sullivan to do it themselves, on Twitter. [Swampland]

{ 12 comments }

TGY June 15, 2009 at 3:36 pm

Surely, he will have some comment on momentous topics such as Berlusconi’s supposed romance with an underage girl? Or perhaps I should stop calling you Shirley.

Internally valid June 15, 2009 at 3:37 pm

God, I hope they do the press conference during a naked pool party.

mrsixinch June 15, 2009 at 3:39 pm

[re=339017]Internally valid[/re]: Berlusconi in the buff? Gahhhhh!

Min June 15, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Or he could just declare war on John McCain and Andrew Sullivan.

jagorev June 15, 2009 at 4:06 pm

You know what I farking hate whenever people use Twitter to communicate about a breaking news event (Iran, or the Mumbai attacks, or whatever)? The fact that 80% of the “tweets” are about how fucking awesome twitter is and how it’s so cool that twitter is being used to cover breaking news. I’d like Twitter if there weren’t so much masturbation about twitter.

hobospacejunkie June 15, 2009 at 4:11 pm

Hey, she’s 18 already, I think. LEAVE SILVIO ALONE…LEAVE HIM ALONE!!

A better solution to the mess in Iran is open our borders to all their women who uniformly seem to be extremely hot and look great in green. Leave the whole country to the menfolk to beat their chests and drop dead leaders out of coffins. We’ll take the wimmins.

hobospacejunkie June 15, 2009 at 4:21 pm

Also, I masturbated using green lotion today to support Iran’s hot chicks in green. And I ate a lot of artificially-colored frozen treats yesterday so my poop was green to protest the Iranian government stealing the election. I also mixed the results of both activities to support Guns ‘n’ Ammo.

Min June 15, 2009 at 4:28 pm

[re=339096]hobospacejunkie[/re]: That is either the goofiest plan for Middle East domination that I have ever heard, or the most brilliant.

AxmxZ June 15, 2009 at 4:45 pm

[re=339085]jagorev[/re]: Iranian hardcore twitterers are all about the events beign covered. The only time the Twitter the medium became Twitter the message was when they realized it was going to be shut down for maintenance today for an hour and a half.

AxmxZ June 15, 2009 at 4:47 pm

[re=339085]jagorev[/re]: What you are describing is how CNN goes about discussing things. They’re all like “Aren’t we awesome for occasionally checking Twitter! Yey, twitter! Yey us! We are not old and uncool – we are young and with it!” Twitter itself is too busy passing around proxy servers for Iran, taking down sites of the clerics and relaying pictures/videos of people being beaten/killed.

sati demise June 15, 2009 at 5:19 pm

Barry! Give a shout out to those Iranian College Students, ya hear?
If you cant find your trucknutz for the kids, at least give ‘em a tweet in support.

skahammer June 16, 2009 at 8:09 am

I just want to say that the sobriquet “leathery clown king” is worthy of the glory days of Spy magazine. (“Short-fingered vulgarian,” “tiny Scientologist-actor” — and hey, those guys are still around, too!)

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