• February 13, 2012
  • FINALLY SOME JOE THE PLUMBER NEWS! He spoke somewhere and said hilarious things: “‘This country has been great for over 180 years,’ Wurzelbacher said after urging folks to study the Constitution. It wasn’t clear whether something happened in the late 1820s to make the United States great, but other than a few puzzled glances from the crowd, everyone went with it.” That’s when Ronald Reagan invented Internet pornography, of course. [Colorado Independent via The Plank]

{ 44 comments }

kingofmeh June 23, 2009 at 4:42 pm

Clearly he means ever since we kicked that nancy-boy John Quincy Adams out of office.

Come here a minute June 23, 2009 at 4:43 pm

180 out of 233 ain’t bad, that’s a .773 batting average.

Vartan84 June 23, 2009 at 4:45 pm

He’s dating it to the “Era of Good Feelings”. That was a fun time for everyone, except that one guy Monroe chased out of the White House with a fire poker.

Scrodd June 23, 2009 at 4:45 pm

If he gets arrested for domestic violence before the end of July, I win a betting pool. C’mon, Joe show your ex-wife what you’re made of.

torera June 23, 2009 at 4:46 pm

no no no no. no more joe the plumber news, not ever. not even if he runs naked the whole length of the appalachian trail.

Jim Newell June 23, 2009 at 4:46 pm

[re=345614]kingofmeh[/re]: Yeah if you’re going to be charitable you could say he was referring to the election of Andrew Jackson, the first time an idiot became president by campaigning on the “I am an idiot, just like you!” platform.

Lord Growing June 23, 2009 at 4:47 pm

The Declaration and the Constitution ain’t shit compared to the Monroe Doctrine. Fools.

slappypaddy June 23, 2009 at 4:50 pm

180 years ago everybody in this country — man, woman, and child — was shit-faced drunk. you can look it up. old plumbin’ joe misses those times terribly and wishes he were back in dem good ol’ daze, since his schtick is a laugh-riot to a blotto audience but don’t play so well to the sober.

Hopey dont play that game June 23, 2009 at 4:51 pm

Were those consecutive years?

Noodle Salad June 23, 2009 at 4:52 pm

[T]here could be “Joe the Plumber” Christmas ornaments in his merchandising future. Say no more, Samuel.BIBLE SPICE/WURZELBACHER 4EVA

stew June 23, 2009 at 4:52 pm

Welcome back Joe! By the way, Sanford was with me. Pictures of him doing lines and getting a lap dance at “Baby Dolls” forthcoming.

Extemporanus June 23, 2009 at 4:54 pm

In 1822, the first valveless toilet was installed in the United States, thereby providing—180 years later—Samuel “Joe the Plumber” Wurlzebacher with a device into which he has had the blessed opportunity to pour his heart, soul, and someday—God willing—cremated remains.

Joshua Norton June 23, 2009 at 4:54 pm

He must be referring the number of years we were subjects of kings and queens. Counting Bush & Cheney.

Mr Blifil June 23, 2009 at 4:54 pm

I believe 180 years ago corresponds to the invention of the elbow joint.

NoWireHangers June 23, 2009 at 4:55 pm

Clearly Samuel Wurzelbacher was referring to the publishing of David Walker’s Appeal in September of 1829. As a “average Joe” who fights for the rights of all Americans, Mr. Wurzelbacher clearly intended to draw a comparison to Walker’s pamphlet, which called for slaves to rise up against their masters. If Joe the Plumber is anything, he’s a man well versed in the richness of American History.

mrpuma2u June 23, 2009 at 4:55 pm

[re=345622]Jim Newell[/re]: True, but the nation clearly swang the other way (no pun intended, really) when they elected perfumed dandy Martin Van Buren next, who oddly enough was a buddy of ol Hickory, even though they were almost complete opposites.

magic titty June 23, 2009 at 4:57 pm

I’m with ya Joe! I also discount those three Millard Fillmore years, and 50 other random years, arbitrarily.

Extemporanus June 23, 2009 at 4:57 pm

[re=345640]Mr Blifil[/re]: Which explains why Hilary’s finally gave out—those things are only good for about 150 years or so.

Suds McKenzie June 23, 2009 at 4:58 pm

1820 is when we invented the sham wow.

Noodle Salad June 23, 2009 at 4:59 pm

[re=345648]magic titty[/re]: Anything that has to do with Whigs is right out, naturally.

bitchincamaro June 23, 2009 at 4:59 pm

“Grassroots is where it’s at.”

If by that he means, the shameless regurgitaion of our radio hate-speechers talking points and the wringing the last drop of milk from the great teat of the celebrity creation machine that is the MSM, then yes, grassroots is indeed Sam’s bag.

Serious June 23, 2009 at 5:00 pm

Shut up, you guys, some people are just different. My family personally is very excited for the changing seasons this week on the Joe The Plumber calendar year.

ph7 June 23, 2009 at 5:01 pm

Indoor plumbing was invented 180 years ago.

sezme June 23, 2009 at 5:04 pm

Perhaps he was counting the period from 1776 until 1956, although he wasn’t born until 1971, so what happened 17 years before he was born? Or perhaps he wasn’t counting consecutive years, just picking and choosing 180 good ones out of the 233 available. Probably just discounted all the years with Democratic presidents from Grover Cleveland on up. That makes sense.

shortsshortsshorts June 23, 2009 at 5:04 pm

Joe is also proud of the 1987 signing of the Declaration of Independence. Make this fucker a teacher, QUICK.

lmj June 23, 2009 at 5:06 pm

Easy question.

Monroe Doctrine 1823: first expression of National Will concerning Righteous Warfighting, backed by not much ability to do anything about it.
Erie Canal officially opened in 1825: Dang-nabbit-carn-sorn-it just sheer diggity-dog gittin’ things done-ness of all American Lets see asses and elbows doing something-or-other makin’ stuff. Work. Can-do Spirit. Stat.

These fit nicely into current high-tone intellectual GOP style Doctrine.

Next.

azw88 June 23, 2009 at 5:19 pm

“She’s a nice lady and I like her. She doesn’t have that gleam of power in her eyes.”

No, that is the glazed over, vacant stare of a failed jockette who failed even at the one career that failed jockettes are supposed to succeed at: tv journalism.

DailyComicsReview June 23, 2009 at 5:19 pm

Honestly people? He said “more than 180 years”, he just couldn’t do the quick mental math = 2009 minus 1776

19kevin8 June 23, 2009 at 5:24 pm

Did Tidy Bowl hit the market 180 years ago?

19kevin8 June 23, 2009 at 5:27 pm

[re=345691]DailyComicsReview[/re]: I’m more than 5 years old!

lmj June 23, 2009 at 5:31 pm

[re=345691]DailyComicsReview[/re]: I absolutely disagree. It “meant something” Everything nuance and detail of every utterance in politics “means something”, especially from a political utterance artist like Joe the Plumber. And “means something” bigtime. We had our bicentennial over 30 years ago. The generic duration of generic United State-ness is 200 years. You can look it up, someplace. It is our official duration in ceremonial talk.

It’s like saying “desecrating unintentional affront” rather than “desecrating abomination”.

No no, my friend. It “meant something”. Just like ” ” “means something”. Not sure what. But it does.

rocktonsammy June 23, 2009 at 5:31 pm

Can’t Barry get JTP a green job or something?

Go away!

AKAM80TheWolf June 23, 2009 at 5:40 pm

Who let the negro in?

WhatTheHeck June 23, 2009 at 5:59 pm

[re=345663]sezme[/re]: I think you’ve nailed it with 1956.
As far as Joe is concerned, the ’50s was when the country started to go to hell. Civil rights. Voting rights. Rock n’ roll.
He wishes for the good old days when people knew their place and that made the country great.

WIDTAP June 23, 2009 at 6:13 pm

[re=345734]WhatTheHeck[/re]: Yeah. Eisenhower really fucked this country up. I think it must have been the interstate highway system. Everything was going great until then.

Humpback June 23, 2009 at 6:25 pm

Give him some credit; he’s talking base 12.

Adolf Bachmann June 23, 2009 at 6:48 pm

He said OVER 180 years, so Amurrrica could be a BILLION years old, only it was created by Jesus & Pat Robertson Six Thousand Years ago, when John Wayne wrassled the dinosaurs into submission, allowing President Teddy Roosevelt to annex Texas from the Mole People. Ronald Reagan, also.

AxmxZ June 23, 2009 at 7:04 pm

[re=345660]ph7[/re]: As someone well-versed in the art of shitting into outhouses, I stand with Joe the Plumber on this. FUCK outhouses, yey flush toilets!

problemwithcaring June 23, 2009 at 7:36 pm

Clearly, he meant the 1820 Missouri Compromise forbidding slavery in the Louisiana Territory north of the parallel 36….aw, fuck it I can’t even try….

Blender June 23, 2009 at 10:18 pm

Technically, he’s correct in saying that America has been great for MORE than 180 years, if you accept the premise that America is “great,” which is arguably false. Just ask that guy who is outside my window digging through the dumpster and muttering something about how the pickles are GOING TO HAVE TO GO NOW.

Lionel Hutz Esq. June 24, 2009 at 3:04 am

And honestly, when did the people at Red State start dropping Acid?

Bruno June 24, 2009 at 3:20 am

If it hasn’t been mentioned above, Joe’s website has been down – no exciting user forums, book promotions, golf gear, etc! This all happened around the time he started saying he was leaving the GOP. Coincidence or he just can’t pay his ISP bills?

http://www.shortsshortsshorts.com/?p=3839

(I’m not a shorts puppet so please do not ban me)

Bruno June 24, 2009 at 3:21 am

[re=346040]Bruno[/re]: This is JTP’s website: http://www.secureourdream.com, which has clearly been disappeared

Lionel Hutz Esq. June 24, 2009 at 3:23 am

For once, Joe is right. Everyone knows that Washington was a commmie who radically changed how this country was governed. Adams and Jefferson wanted to gay marry each other (Adams’ last words, “Thomas Jefferson still survives!” Jefferson’s, who was dying at the same time, “It was in John’s arms that I learned what it means to truly love.” Madison raised taxes, and Monroe never secured the boarder with Mexico (Texas and California were just crawling with Mexicans at those times, forever changing the towns of Saint Anthony, Saint Francis, and The Angels, amongst others). It is only when John Quincy Adams banned gay marriage and came out in favor of the torture of Canadians, that this country finally rocked.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: