• February 15, 2012

Uh oh, Grampa Cornpants has stolen the intern’s key to the Twitter machine again. Time to shout nonsense at the President! See, Chuck Grassley and the Republicans, along with certain awful humans like Ben Nelson and Joe Lieberman, are begging a resilient Obama to wait until after their August recess to “finish” health care, because they want it to lose all momentum and die on the Senate floor. Who will want to cast a tough vote a mere fourteen months before midterm elections?? doRITE, doRITE! [Twitter]

{ 41 comments }

Buzz Feedback July 17, 2009 at 5:15 pm

He’s old. It make take Grassley until August to finish.

Extemporanus July 17, 2009 at 5:17 pm

He ran out of characters before he could finish his twat. What he meant to say was: “doRITE-AID sell mint flavrd hemmerhoidz creem? need now PLZ!!”

gidgetbananas July 17, 2009 at 5:17 pm

Thank you, Wonkette. Your posts have taught me that no one who wishes to appear intelligent or retain a shred of dignity should Twitter. Never, ever, ever.

NavinJohnson July 17, 2009 at 5:19 pm

@Cornpants “I say we call Matlock. He’ll find the culprit. It’s probably that evil Gavin MacLeod or George ‘Goober’ Lindsay.”

lizard scum July 17, 2009 at 5:20 pm

DoRITE is Obama’s new State Pharmacy to hand out free Rx drugs and marijuana and Bayer Heroin to all Americans (who are senior citizens).

Snarkalicious July 17, 2009 at 5:20 pm

Will somebody please repo this sub-simian dickhead’s thumbs?

NavinJohnson July 17, 2009 at 5:21 pm

@Cornpants “I say we call Matlock. He’ll find the culprit. It’s probably that evil Gavin MacLeod or George ‘Goober’ Lindsay.” 6:59 AM Jul 16th from Twit

AlexisHidell July 17, 2009 at 5:24 pm

Chuck Grassley’s sister Lois was my high school typing teacher, and I am certain that his twit-skillz have her rolling in her grave. As a belated tribute, think I’ll stop by Chuck’s office when I’m in DC later this summer and scream “HANDS ON HOME ROW!!!” Ol’ Lois would appreciate that.

4tehlulz July 17, 2009 at 5:25 pm

Leave DuD13y doRITE out of this, you prick.

LittlePig July 17, 2009 at 5:28 pm

[re=365292]4tehlulz[/re]: Grassley’s Dudley’s brother, Dumbass doRite.

Humpback July 17, 2009 at 5:30 pm

doRITE is the new secret GOP motto–distract Obama Rule in the Election. Watch for it to appear everywhere, like an Illuminati symbol.

LittlePig July 17, 2009 at 5:32 pm

“But DoRITE by all my insurance lobbyist friends, plz”

hobospacejunkie July 17, 2009 at 5:32 pm

Chuck’s just pissed that not enough people are dying from lack of health care. He has OVER in the over/under office pool on Total Unnecessary Deaths From Lack of Health Care this year.

Hooray For Anything July 17, 2009 at 5:33 pm

If Grassley is working on a health care bill, will he actually write the bill up or will he just twitter it?

IceIceBaby July 17, 2009 at 5:45 pm

@youngwhipperschapper muslin prez: GET OFF MY LAWN!

Jukesgrrl July 17, 2009 at 5:49 pm

[re=365288]AlexisHidell[/re]: “HANDS ON HOME ROW.” Wow, I haven’t heard that expression for y-e-a-r-s! But if you want to do us a real favor, don’t wait until you visit Grassley’s office. If you’re already in Iowa, can’t you do some corn version of a tea-bagging event? Complete with suggestions about where Grassley could put the corn you’re waving around?? C’mon, it’d be better than the 4th of July and you can Twit the pix.

finallyhappy July 17, 2009 at 5:54 pm

[re=365288]AlexisHidell[/re]: Iowa? Machine Shed? Bring us one of those 10 pound sweet rolls when you come to DC. We will meet at the Wonkette offices.

Naked Bunny with a Whip July 17, 2009 at 5:57 pm

Iowa isn’t all married gay buttsecks with corncobs on Friday. Well, it is, but the Republicans stick to the church basements and use butter on their cobs, for God.

BlueStateLibtard July 17, 2009 at 5:57 pm

I like the way he randomly capitalizes words a la the 18th century. He’s a lot older than I thought.

Min July 17, 2009 at 6:03 pm

What’s the mountie reference at the end supposed to mean?

orange July 17, 2009 at 6:05 pm

doRITE: isn’t that the generic version of Mountain Dew bought at the drugstore?

eclecticbrotha July 17, 2009 at 6:06 pm

Damn, Chuck Grassley is a Cabaret Voltaire fan? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkfzXq0tA3c

Cherry Garcia July 17, 2009 at 6:15 pm

doRITE is his reference of Dudley Do-Right, described here as “a Canadian idiot” http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2280t_a-canadian-idiot-dudley-doright_fun

So, in reality Grassley is endorsing the Canadian system of socialized healthcare ergo supporting Obama or in other words, he’s here to save the day!!!

Moleman v2.5 July 17, 2009 at 6:19 pm

[re=365297]LittlePig[/re]: Maybe it’s all code: He’s DoRITE, Palin is Moose and Lindsey Graham is Squirrel?

eclecticbrotha July 17, 2009 at 6:21 pm

[re=365297]LittlePig[/re]: Dudley DoRite’s evil twin, Nevva DoRite.

Moleman v2.5 July 17, 2009 at 6:26 pm

doRITE also HENNNNGH!!!!
Wide stance throes trollop
Appalachian promise keeper

BlueStateLibtard July 17, 2009 at 6:31 pm

Ok, I get it, Grassley’s having a gay buttsek affair with a Canadian. Makes sense.

Delicious July 17, 2009 at 6:44 pm

[re=365353]eclecticbrotha[/re]: I thought of that, too.

doRITE nObama!

Not_So_Much July 17, 2009 at 6:47 pm

These senate whores are really starting to piss me off. Isn’t this the same pile of shit that screeched “get a guvmint job!” to someone asking why they couldn’t get the same care as him??

SethCReedermeyer July 17, 2009 at 6:55 pm

I Propose that Grassley go backto School to Learn when to Capitalise WORDS. I Guess he thinks That the crazy Kids on the interTubes love the Capitals! (Not the Hockey TEAM, Which would Be clear If i Didn’t needlessly capitalize!)

Holding Out for a Hero July 17, 2009 at 6:56 pm

For the love of all that is holy, will someone please kill Twitter?

Smoke Filled Roommate July 17, 2009 at 7:11 pm

“…Baucus and I know that But doRITEOS is what I gots a hankerin Fer. Fuck healthCareReform.”

assistant/atlas July 17, 2009 at 7:16 pm

I hope someone with AIDS rapes Chuck Grassley and he loses his Senate seat and its attendant insurance and ends up giving handjobs for AZT on the side of Iowa’s highways.

Or maybe just the lose his Senate seat part.

Man I really want health care.

Mr Blifil July 17, 2009 at 9:37 pm

Duddley?

Edywin July 17, 2009 at 9:55 pm

Lv 2 rezpnd bt cnt bcawz hanz stuk on hme row

sezme July 17, 2009 at 10:20 pm

Why does Twitter hate grammar?

BobLoblawLawBlog July 17, 2009 at 10:27 pm

[re=365374]Moleman v2.5[/re]: Do I detect a GOP Haiku?

Seriously, though, I’m starting to think Grassley’s typing and random capitalizations of letters amount to a piece of performance art. I think he’s a Dada art exhibit, entitled “Grumpy Old Fart”…to be placed right next to the gold-plated urinal…

nightshift July 17, 2009 at 11:08 pm

Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit Sucking the tit

Sorry, but I still can’t get over this. Sucking the tit, also.

LoweredPeninsula July 17, 2009 at 11:59 pm

I guess someone forgot to tell Grassley that he’s a complete waste of his daddy’s balloon juice.

zhubajie July 18, 2009 at 11:07 pm

[re=365320]Jukesgrrl[/re]: I’d be very surprised if Grassley has ever done farm work.

Zhu Bajie, Iowa farm boy

You Moonbats! July 20, 2009 at 12:47 pm

my name says everything i need to say to you clowns.

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