• February 13, 2012
  • MASS. SENATE PASSES ‘TED KENNEDY MEMORIAL PARTISAN WARM-BODY ACT,’ HOORAY! Oh good, now Gov. Deval Patrick should be able to sign this quick fixeroo tomorrow and Michael Dukakis or whoever can putz around Washington for a few months, casting a crucial vote or two occasionally. Also, pundits can stop saying, “But the Democrats only have 59 seats, they need Olympia Snowe!!!” because it is not true anymore. No one needs Olympia Snowe! NO ONE! [Boston Globe]

{ 37 comments }

V572625694 September 22, 2009 at 4:21 pm

Mittens! Give it to Mittens!

SayItWithWookies September 22, 2009 at 4:21 pm

So get well soon, Senator Byrd!

OzoneTom September 22, 2009 at 4:24 pm

Isn’t Dukakis too busy shopping at Filene’s Basement?

sezme September 22, 2009 at 4:25 pm

I need Olympia Snowe! Call me, Olympia, you know you want me like I want the circa 1977 version of you.

mcc September 22, 2009 at 4:25 pm

Is getting Lieberman on board really going to be any easier than getting Snowe on board would have been?

Vulpes82 September 22, 2009 at 4:27 pm

But one of the 60 is a walking corpse that gets the vapors if he rises too quickly, and the other is human wastedump Vinegar Joe Lieberman. We will never escape the tyranny of Olympia Snowe! Bow before your Lobster Queen!

Leopolt September 22, 2009 at 4:28 pm

I haven’t liked anything Olympia Snowe has done since “Moonstruck”.

bureaucrap September 22, 2009 at 4:29 pm

ThinkProgress already promised the seat to Dr. Atul Gawande.

Jukesgrrl September 22, 2009 at 4:29 pm

I guess you’re assuming West Virginia has found some doddering old fool to put on a Senator Byrd suit and cast their other vote. The rich kid can’t do everything.

magic titty September 22, 2009 at 4:30 pm

[re=416852]SayItWithWookies[/re]: What’s the problem? If he goes, we’ll just substitute another reformed klansman. Where is that guy from American History X, anyway…?

PAbitter September 22, 2009 at 4:31 pm

You know that they need Olympia Snow because at least a quarter of the Democratic Senate are spineless enough that they won’t vote for it unless she does.
I hate the Senate. The old Roman one caused the fall of the Republic and our new and improved version will probably end up causing the fall of the U.S.

Crank Tango September 22, 2009 at 4:33 pm

I am hoping the right wing will be meaner to olympia snowe than we are, and she will “pull a specter.” It could happen.

samsuncle September 22, 2009 at 4:38 pm

I can’t wait to see Dukakis driving his tank up the capitol steps to take his rightful place in the senate.

Snarkalicious September 22, 2009 at 4:40 pm

Please send somebody whis gay married. I want to be able to tell my grandkids about the day the GOP had a collective head splodee.

Jukesgrrl September 22, 2009 at 4:40 pm

Jim, how could you think they would “totally wimp out”? Massachusetts politicians have never met an underhanded backroom deal they didn’t like. They give extra votes for creativity and the benefactor passes out cigars.

Extemporanus September 22, 2009 at 4:43 pm

It’s a shame that there isn’t any room left for Roland Burris to engrave another oustanding career accomplishment on his McMausoleum, or he’d be on this seat like black on dice.

Extemporanus September 22, 2009 at 4:48 pm

[re=416871]Crank Tango[/re]: I read that at first as “pull a sphincter”, which actually works just as well.

Min September 22, 2009 at 4:57 pm

And if there was anything Teddy loved, it was a warm body.

jasper f. krone September 22, 2009 at 4:59 pm

[re=416885]Extemporanus[/re]: a sphincter is haunting the state of Maine…?

Come here a minute September 22, 2009 at 5:04 pm

[re=416861]Leopolt[/re]: You’re thinking of Kitty Dukakis.

Jukesgrrl September 22, 2009 at 5:10 pm

[re=416851]V572625694[/re]: I don’t want Mittens casting any votes unless he’s wearing his proctologist gloves.

StrangelyBrown September 22, 2009 at 5:13 pm

Can’t they just split the difference and appoint Olympia Dukakis?

shortsshortsshorts September 22, 2009 at 5:17 pm

DON’T BLAME ME I VOTED FOR THE DEAD GUY.

jfruh September 22, 2009 at 5:21 pm

[re=416855]sezme[/re]: I’m assuming you’re talking about this?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:SenSnowe-1997.jpg

Yowza!

Snarkalicious September 22, 2009 at 5:21 pm

[re=416881]Extemporanus[/re]: Painted on the bottom of a divot and surrounded by white petroleum product? Huh…yeah, I can see that.

Extemporanus September 22, 2009 at 5:49 pm

[re=416927]Snarkalicious[/re]: That was a perceptively succint deconstruction of Roland “Dem Bones” Burris and his place in the congressional crap game.

Lionel Hutz Esq. September 22, 2009 at 5:50 pm

Can they appoint Gov. Patterson? Because that would seem to take care of a whole lot of problems with just one stone.

user-of-owls September 22, 2009 at 5:53 pm

No one needs Olympia Snowe! NO ONE!

Mr. Wonkett,

You will be hearing from our attorneys shortly.

Association of Sneering New England Harridans

Accordion-o-rama September 22, 2009 at 5:55 pm

59: Never again!

Suds McKenzie September 22, 2009 at 7:14 pm

“And how does the distinguished Senator from Mass vote on Senate Resolution 10032A”?

Big Popi: “Jes”

user-of-owls September 22, 2009 at 7:21 pm

[re=417006]Suds McKenzie[/re]: “Dis bill been bery, bery good to me.”

Oh, but menos un punto por un sacrilegio contra el PApi Grande.

S.Luggo September 22, 2009 at 8:01 pm

[re=416862]bureaucrap[/re]: Birth certificate now! The real real one from Kenyastan, not some Haole traitorous forgery.
— Oily

Duvall Patrick should appoint himself and then let RNC scholar-in-residence Stelley Mike accuse Obama of raciousity, racistness, and racialing.

[re=416851]V572625694[/re]: No. Henry Gates. Fun.

InKnockYouUs September 22, 2009 at 8:09 pm

How do you know when Olympia Snowe was in your bed?
You wake up wet!

hobospacejunkie September 22, 2009 at 8:49 pm

Deval Patrick should appoint Corey Booker. He may not be technically eligible but he’s hella qualified.

S.Luggo September 22, 2009 at 9:08 pm

[re=417036]hobospacejunkie[/re]: A New Jersey mayor and a former commie …, excuse me, community … activist. Yup. That will work.

I’m back to my original suggestion: Henry Gates.

LowerdPeninsula September 23, 2009 at 4:01 am

[re=416926]jfruh[/re]: Dayum. Behold the ravages of age. What have you done to your Olympia Snow, age?

BTW, Patrick (what a good Irish name) should just install some Southie so we’ll have some adorably hilarious stereotype to bring laughter to the uptight Senate.

Lastly, I’m so tired of “we need exactly 60 votes for anything”. We only need 60 votes if we’re afraid of a fucking filibuster. What we need is nothing more then 51 votes for anything. I dare those fuckers to filibuster. I dare them.

plowman September 23, 2009 at 8:29 am

But wait, in ’04 the Mass. legislature said the wise people of the state must decide who should replace Kerry when (tee, hee) he won the White House. Have the good folks of Massachusetts gotten less smarter or something?

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: