• February 11, 2012

Richard Simmons, in better daysThere is one thing standing between NY-23 “Conservative Party candidate” Doug Hoffman and his rightful election: the ACORN. Hoffman’s supporters know that ACORN — a non-profit that focuses on such things as low-income housing — is working behind the scenes with Obama and his friends, the Africans, to procure a stolen victory for the liberal Democrat candidate, Bill “Al Sharpton” Owens.

The Washington Independent‘s Dave Weigel, as usual, actually traveled to the latest wingnut hot spot, to embarrass them:

The gap between Hoffman and his supporters seemed to widen from the beginning of the day to the final rally. In the morning, as Vice President Joe Biden rallied Democrats in Watertown by portraying Hoffman as the candidate of Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, and Tea Party activists. Outside, two dozen Hoffman supporters lined the sidewalks with signs that attacked Owens as a “Pelosi puppet” and an agent of ACORN.

“I was at a Tea Party, but this is too slow a process for me,” said John Dewitt, a contractor from Adams, N.Y. “I’m more on the violence side. I’m more of the Civil War, revolutionary kind of guy. I’m of the old school–you kick them in the ass and be done with it.”

The Hoffman backers outside of the Biden event all said they’d attended Tea Parties. Some were affiliated with Glenn Beck’s 9/12 Project. All worried that ACORN was going to show up in the district, or even at the Biden event–a paranoia that led to some minor awkwardness when an African-American Hoffman worker walked by.

“This guy’s with ACORN,” said Dewitt.

“Definitely, not from around here,” said businessman Erik Dunk.

There are, of course, no racial components to the right wing’s campaign against ACORN.

A New Conservative Star Wrestles With the Spotlight [Washington Independent]

{ 61 comments }

OzoneTom November 3, 2009 at 1:29 pm

Bidens got the Acorn, but Hoffman has all of the nuts?

Extemporanus November 3, 2009 at 1:31 pm

This sounds like a job for NUTBUSTERZ!

Watch your nutz ACORN—they’re comin’ for you! Mwahhhahahaha!

Gopherit November 3, 2009 at 1:32 pm

“I’m more on the violence side. I’m more of the Civil War, revolutionary kind of guy. I’m of the old school–you kick them in the ass and be done with it.”

And we will know they are Christians by their love.

Though, I have to say, I love all of this big talk. Let’s see him say that down the barrel of an Abrams tank.

JSDC007 November 3, 2009 at 1:32 pm

Tonight flesh eating voodoo African zombies will search for the juicy fatty flesh of teabaggers John Dewitt and Erik Dunk to serve with acorn stew.

bureaucrap November 3, 2009 at 1:32 pm

Everyone on the right knows that ACORN is an acronym composed of derogatory epithets for African-Americans. Otherwise, the mouth-breathers have no idea whatsoever about why they should hate them.

Zadig November 3, 2009 at 1:34 pm

About this fictional “John Dewitt” character: I keep hearing about these random wingtards at rallies giving their occupations as “contractor”. Is this some kind of euphemism for a meth lab technician?

sati demise November 3, 2009 at 1:34 pm

[re=449178]OzoneTom[/re]: ba da bump!

Canmon (the Inadequate) November 3, 2009 at 1:38 pm

“Definitely, not from around here”

Just like Hoffman.

Gorillionaire November 3, 2009 at 1:38 pm

[re=449187]Zadig[/re]: “Contractor” is the lower classes version of “Consultant”.

PrairiePossum November 3, 2009 at 1:39 pm

“Definitely, not from around here,” said businessman Erik Dunk.

Neither are Palin, Beck and Limbaugh, but the Hoffman’s white supporters don’t ever point that out.

Georgia Burning November 3, 2009 at 1:40 pm

“a paranoia that led to some minor awkwardness when an African-American Hoffman worker walked by”

I presume “minor awkwardness” means the idiots wanted to lynch him but the cops pointed out the cameras.

NJB November 3, 2009 at 1:41 pm

Looks like the Teabagger Party are getting hip to the idea that it’s always best to come out with your paranoid, nutzoid election-theft fantasies *before* the ballots are counted. That way, if Hoffman wins, they didn’t just win the election, but they stood in the way of the nefarious plots of the ACORN Africans.

But if they lose, the narrative as to why they lost (theft) is already set.

It’s like total win/win. What strategery!

Whiskeybaby November 3, 2009 at 1:41 pm

These elections are rapidly devolving into Alien vs Predator: Whoever wins, we lose

TGY November 3, 2009 at 1:43 pm

It’s teatime in America.

McDuff November 3, 2009 at 1:44 pm

[re=449187]Zadig[/re]: “Contractor” = wingnut speak for white, unemployed day laborer in the construction trades (due to hangover or meth induced tardiness) with delusions of owning own business (see Plumber, Joe).

One Yield Regular November 3, 2009 at 1:45 pm

Old Watertown, nothing much happenin’, down on Main, ‘cept a little rain
Old Watertown, everyone knows, the perfect crime, killin’ time
And no one’s goin’ anywhere, livin’s much too easy there
It can never be a lonely place when there’s the shelter of familiar faces
Who can say it’s not that way, Old Watertown, so much excitement
To be found hangin’ round, there’s someone standing in the rain
Waiting for the morning train, it’s gonna be a lonely place
Without the look of familiar faces, but who can say it’s not that way

mollymcguire November 3, 2009 at 1:45 pm

“Asked to respond to the vice president’s charge that he wouldn’t be able to make any decisions that offended Rush Limbaugh, Hoffman shrugged and reached for his talking points.”

Rush told me not to answer that question was his reply.

JMP November 3, 2009 at 1:46 pm

“I’m more on the violence side. I’m more of the Civil War, revolutionary kind of guy”

But DHS was just engaging in partisan politics when it assessed the threat of right-wing terrorism. And remember, the Operation Rescue guy who shot Dr. Tiller, the NRA nut who shot up the cops in Pittsburgh, whoever lynched the census taker, and the guy who shot up the Unitarian church in Kentucky were all just loan nuts, not part of any movement.

SayItWithWookies November 3, 2009 at 1:48 pm

[Erik] Dunk said that when Obama told an interviewer that America’s Muslim population could constitute one of the largest Islamic countries in the world, he changed the sign at his Harley-Davidson dealership to read “This is not a Muslim nation, and Obama is not a Christian.” He took down the sign, reluctantly, after a local university professor complained about it, and singled out the incident as a reason he was worried about losing his freedoms.

You know this country is being destroyed when people are allowed to complain about the idiotic sentiments you put on your marquees.

Snarkalicious November 3, 2009 at 1:48 pm

[re=449191]Gorillionaire[/re]: Based on recent votes in Congress, it could also mean “Rapist/Rapist Booster’s Club Member” in this context.

queeraselvis v 2.0 November 3, 2009 at 1:49 pm

Later in the day, Hoffman fielded another question about Limbaugh from Jude Seymour of the Watertown Daily Times. Asked whether he agreed with Limbaugh’s remarks that Scozzafava had committed “beastiality” by “screwing every RINO (Republican in Name Only),” Hoffman was taken aback. “I’d have to talk with him first,” he said. “I don’t know–that’s Rush Limbaugh. I have no comment to that.” Conservative reporters immediately chastised Seymour for asking the question and promptly directed him to Lanny Davis for civility lessons.

/fixed

V572625694 November 3, 2009 at 1:51 pm

[re=449187]Zadig[/re]: Contractor = unemployed carpenter’s helper = handyman.

Monsieur Grumpe November 3, 2009 at 1:51 pm
Lascauxcaveman November 3, 2009 at 1:53 pm

[re=449187]Zadig[/re]: “I keep hearing about these random wingtards at rallies giving their occupations as “contractor”. Is this some kind of euphemism for a meth lab technician?”

Naw. It just means unemployed guy who did some woodworking or landscaping at some point previous. (Usually for his mom.)

Simba B November 3, 2009 at 1:56 pm

I live in the district just south and west of NY-23 (we elected a Democrat for the first time in 30 years last year, so we’re not all that much better), and I work at a local community college. Some student was randomly talking about the election (he lives in NY-23) and he told me that Hoffman has a “pedophile smile”. Actually he didn’t even mention Hoffman by name but I’d seen the picture(s) he was talking about.

Evil Dr. Puma November 3, 2009 at 1:56 pm

[re=449209]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: In much the same sense that the Atlantic Ocean is a little bit damp.

Servo November 3, 2009 at 1:58 pm

I haven’t the heart to tell them of Bill Owens’ plans of de-regulating the deer stand manufacturing industry.

[re=449208]V572625694[/re]:
They’re called barflies in NY-23.

Extemporanus November 3, 2009 at 1:58 pm

[re=449208]V572625694[/re]: Contractor = unemployed carpenter’s helper = handyman = JESUS!

CapnFatback November 3, 2009 at 2:01 pm

[re=449213]Simba B[/re]: Oh, yeah, I see it . . . Hoffman is the one on the right in the above picture, correct?

binarian November 3, 2009 at 2:01 pm

[re=449210]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: …or “Yeah, I used to work in the trades, but the economy, you know, I got laid off….”; which probably means he was a lazy-ass loud mouth on the job and when they were looking for someone to cut…..he won.

Gopherit November 3, 2009 at 2:02 pm

Dewitt is a “contractor” like JtP. I wonder if they’ve done any gay porn plumbing together?

Chain Tattoo November 3, 2009 at 2:04 pm

Is that a pic of Richard Simmons frolicking with a furry?
What a Teabagger that Richard is!
Naughty naughty Dick, teabagging a furry like that!

nbawriter November 3, 2009 at 2:06 pm

What’s the over/under on Tea Baggers deciding to burn down every oak tree in the country? Six days?

slithytoves November 3, 2009 at 2:10 pm

I’m in the 23rd, it’s raining, Hoffman sucks ass.

binarian November 3, 2009 at 2:13 pm

[re=449209]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: I see from the blog post Mr. Dunk has a Harley dealership….and as soon as they got wind of the nonsense on the sign in the store a rep called and told him to knock it off. His dealership website has a link to that 9-12 project thingy….which I can’t get to from behind the corporate firewall. Must have some lovely stuff on it. Yeah, he’s a douchebag.

sati demise November 3, 2009 at 2:18 pm

[re=449229]slithytoves[/re]: haiku!

I’m in the 23rd
It’s raining
Hoffman sucks teabag ass

assistant/atlas November 3, 2009 at 2:20 pm

[re=449197]Whiskeybaby[/re]: I didn’t realize anyone ever felt anything but that about elections.

freakishlystrong November 3, 2009 at 2:21 pm

Today, we are all ignorant Glenn Beckian teabaggers.

shadowMark November 3, 2009 at 2:21 pm

It’s obvious to the tea baggers that ACORN is a subtle anagram for AN ORC and they know Orcs are bad. They’re not sure if they read it in Dan Brown or the Bible or somewhere else but they know Orcs are bad.

Monsieur Grumpe November 3, 2009 at 2:22 pm

[re=449231]binarian[/re]:
Yeah, Dunk’s Iron Blockhead Harley Dealer.
http://www.ironblock.com/
Oh look, You can write to them!

blinky_twinkie November 3, 2009 at 2:26 pm

Election Day just isn’t “Election Day” without Nate Silver numbers pr0n.

Tundra Grifter November 3, 2009 at 2:27 pm

[re=449203]JMP[/re]: “Loan nuts” – pissed off mortgage brokers?

ManchuCandidate November 3, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Much like the irony of a crazy “Keel Moose and Squirrel” Moldovia Jew immigrant real estate agent/cavity creep/lawrat questioning the birf certifik8 of Barry Obama, the fact that Hoffman is an outsider with lots of outside support in a STRONG GOP district is lost on the stupidest of the stupid.

Seriously, smarter US America, if you want to join Canada City we understand, but leave these fucks at the border and/or send them to SC before you arrive.

CrunchyKnee November 3, 2009 at 2:29 pm

Contractor = Fred Sandford = Al Jolson, also too.

CrunchyKnee November 3, 2009 at 2:34 pm

[re=449249]CrunchyKnee[/re]: Shit, here’s the edit:

Contractor = Fred Sandford = Al Jolson = Sleeping Giant, also too.

Texan Bulldoggette November 3, 2009 at 2:35 pm

“a paranoia that led to some minor awkwardness when an African-American Hoffman worker walked by.” Sounds like a Michael Steele wannabe…

binarian November 3, 2009 at 2:35 pm

[re=449248]ManchuCandidate[/re]: …AND not only is he a carpetbagger, from reading about the campaign and coverage, he’s a bit overwhelmed by all the attention. Far from being a fire breather he comes off as meek and kinda befuddled. Great material for Rush, Beck, Palin and company. He’s probably all “what the HELL was I thinking?????” right about now.

WIDTAP November 3, 2009 at 2:35 pm

[re=449219]binarian[/re]: We are all Joe the Plumber.

Servo November 3, 2009 at 2:38 pm

[re=449248]ManchuCandidate[/re]:
Oh, if you only knew. The backwoods of NY-23 is a depository for nature’s cruel jokes.

ManchuCandidate November 3, 2009 at 2:43 pm

[re=449255]Servo[/re]:
I sort of do. I went to school in Kingston (not Jamaica) located across Lake Ontario/St Lawrence River from Watertown. I do sort of miss the cheezy backwoods commercials of Watertown TV.

binarian November 3, 2009 at 2:44 pm

[re=449248]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Seriously, smarter US America, if you want to join Canada City we understand, but leave these fucks at the border and/or send them to SC before you arrive.

Thanks, I’ll consider it if this becomes a trend.

President Beeblebrox November 3, 2009 at 2:54 pm

Wingnut logic: if a Nigra is in the presence of a Republican, then said Nigra must either be with ACORN or otherwise trying to corrupt the process.

Like this: Wingnut sees a black guy at a coffee shop in downtown Columbus, Georgia around the time Orly Taitz had a birfer case in Columbus, Georgia. Ergo, black guy must be Attorney General Eric Holder, because, you know.

I looked up and immediately recognized an individual entering and approaching the serving counter, due to his well know [sic] TV displayed distinguishing features: his trim upper lip mustache, not large of stature [sic] and general olive complexion.

binarian November 3, 2009 at 2:59 pm

[re=449262]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Holy Shit. That’s…..crazy…

FlownOver November 3, 2009 at 3:03 pm

“I’m more of the Civil War, revolutionary kind of guy.”

Go for it. You vs. the US Army. I’ll hold your coat.

Because that worked out so well for the Yippies in 1969. Just ask President Grace Slick.

Potater November 3, 2009 at 3:04 pm

[re=449209]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]:
“ROAD KILL tshirts.com
HOME OF BUY 3 GET 2 FREE
WOW!”

Sometimes the banner ads say it all.

Servo November 3, 2009 at 3:04 pm

[re=449256]ManchuCandidate[/re]:
Altmar and Amboy. Where the men are livestock and the women are Geddy Lee.

engulfedinflames November 3, 2009 at 3:07 pm

[re=449187]Zadig[/re]: What we used to call a “handy-man”

thefrontpage November 3, 2009 at 3:18 pm

Shouldn’t they be concerned about the Richard Simmons Influence?

hobospacejunkie November 3, 2009 at 3:28 pm

[re=449213]Simba B[/re]: Yeah, Hoffman has a pedophile smile. He also looks somewhat retarded. Probably the coke bottle glasses, which make his eyes look unnaturally large & uncomprehending. Could also be that he’s just a common dimwit.

PoignancySelz November 3, 2009 at 3:40 pm

[re=449303]hobospacejunkie[/re]: The chlamydia-yellow teeth don’t help the fact he is just another ignorant opportunist.

Jukesgrrl November 3, 2009 at 4:04 pm

[re=449245]blinky_twinkie[/re]: Nate made some money this year. He’s probably in box seats at the World Series.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: