• February 13, 2012
  • HILL OPERATIVES, WE NEED YOU: Much as we’d love to visit the Super Bowl of Retardation this afternoon, we are somewhat low on regular staff these days (have you noticed?) and someone must be “at the desk.” Operatives, this is your time to shine! Tips@wonkette.com! Send photos of Rand Paul breaking into your boss’s office! And if you send e-mails like, “I can see the west lawn of the Capitol from my window, and the entire lawn is full of tea partiers,” maybe attach a photograph.

{ 36 comments }

Terry November 5, 2009 at 12:59 pm

Tea partiers were in Boston in the 1700′s. Tea baggers are currently having rallies.

Mahousu November 5, 2009 at 12:59 pm

Is “at the desk” what they’re calling the Appalachian Trail these days?

Advocatus_Diaboli November 5, 2009 at 1:01 pm

Superbowl of Retardation ftw.
Yay, Jim’s back. How was Lieberdouche’s office? And how’d you make bail so quickly?

SmutBoffin November 5, 2009 at 1:03 pm

Jim’s alive! Rescued from his imprisonment inside a giant Code Pink puppet or from the cooking-pot of hungry Teabaggers/PUMAs!

AnnieGetYourFun November 5, 2009 at 1:03 pm

Please, you roll into “work” at 1PM and expect us to send you shit to write about? NO HANDOUTS FOR LAZY LIBRULS.

Way Cool Larry November 5, 2009 at 1:03 pm

Oh come on Jim, you do the work of ten regular Wonkette editors!

Mumbletypeg November 5, 2009 at 1:05 pm

Put Waggaman on that beat. What’s a roving reporter got better to do today than cover this?

TGY November 5, 2009 at 1:06 pm

So, did Ken get lost in his Hike Up America’s Backside?

octupletsmom November 5, 2009 at 1:06 pm

The “Super Bowl of Retardation” is code for the GOP “Health Plan”, I assume?

JadedDIssonance November 5, 2009 at 1:07 pm

My parents are currently storming the capital. I only have a gleeful tweet from my mom about peasants storming paris and a texted pic from my dad of a few lily-white splotches on the capital front lawn.

Chain Tattoo November 5, 2009 at 1:10 pm

Ru Paul is breaking into Capitol Hill orifices!?!
This I must see — where’s the video?

the problem child November 5, 2009 at 1:13 pm

[re=451069]Terry[/re]: Yeah, if that “tea partiers” e-mail example was real, it was NOT from a wonketteer.

shadowMark November 5, 2009 at 1:13 pm
proudgrampa November 5, 2009 at 1:14 pm

[re=451082]JadedDIssonance[/re]: When the mob stormed the Bastille, all they found were a few old crazies…

I’m just sayin’…

predilectrix November 5, 2009 at 1:14 pm

[re=451082]JadedDIssonance[/re]: So are your parents the Jacobins or the aristocrats being brought by chaise to view the revolution?

Tundra Grifter November 5, 2009 at 1:15 pm

Is “at the desk” better than “on the desk” or “under the desk?”

Wonkette doesn’t have an office – but still has a desk? Is that a table at Starbuck’s?

blinky_twinkie November 5, 2009 at 1:18 pm

[re=451085]Chain Tattoo[/re]: Great Jeebus, I’d PAY good ameros to see that.

Decker November 5, 2009 at 1:20 pm

“I can see the west lawn of the Capitol from my window, and the entire lawn is full of tea partiers,”

That must be 2.5 million teabaggers!

CaiteeCruelle November 5, 2009 at 1:20 pm

Jim, I need that bail money back by Monday. You like yer kneecaps, right, Jim?

freakishlystrong November 5, 2009 at 1:23 pm

[re=451082]JadedDIssonance[/re]: My deepest sympathiez.

hockeymom November 5, 2009 at 1:23 pm

C’mon Federal Workers.
DO YOUR JOBS. WHAT DO YOU THINK WE ARE PAYING YOUR SALARIES FOR?????!!!
We want pictures.
Sheesh.

Tundra Grifter November 5, 2009 at 1:25 pm

When the 9/12′ers needed picutres of a ton of people standing around in DC they just ran a photo from a few years before.

If it’s good enough for them, why isn’t it good enough for us?

That’s the New Media. Guy drives over a broken bottle in upstate New York and screams that his car has been vandalized. Want to make fun of our President? Go on Faux Noise and create a story about him staying at home watching a movie about himself.

Facts? Who needs stickin’ facts?

Spin to Win! Losing an election is a great victory – T-ballitics. Just make it up and run with it.

hobospacejunkie November 5, 2009 at 1:33 pm

Surely FOX is reporting 18 million teabaggers have taken over the mall.

Monsieur Grumpe November 5, 2009 at 1:33 pm
the problem child November 5, 2009 at 1:34 pm

Politico’s photographer needs to clean his lens or something.

Mahousu November 5, 2009 at 1:40 pm

Wow, I just looked out the window, and the crowd is HUGE!

SayItWithWookies November 5, 2009 at 1:40 pm

[re=451108]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: John Voight, John Ratzenberger (Cliff from Cheers — who, surprisingly, was free today) and Betsy McCaughey — an illustrious and fact-free lineup if ever there was one. Who, after hearing these yokels speak and then enduring a rousing version of God Bless America, would not be persuaded that Blue Cross Blue Shield deserves every penny it gets?

bago November 5, 2009 at 1:44 pm

Some douche was up there talking about the “hundreds of thousands” on 9/12.
At any rate I left them a little something to remember me by.
http://twitpic.com/odmhh

the problem child November 5, 2009 at 1:50 pm

Well as long as we’re just making shit up, http://img.alibaba.com/photo/50140355/Wing_Nuts.jpg

house of the blue lights November 5, 2009 at 1:54 pm

If Jim is in DC, who is that under my desk?

Come here a minute November 5, 2009 at 2:01 pm

I noticed that the Mojave Desert correspondent missed the space elevator competition. Book deal my ass — think of your fans, Pope Cat.

Min November 5, 2009 at 2:05 pm

Is there going to be a ridiculously over-hyped half-game show? ‘Cause it just wouldn’t be a Super Bowl without a ridiculously over-hyped half-game show.

Come here a minute November 5, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Mahousu November 5, 2009 at 2:19 pm

[re=451158]Min[/re]: Well, there will probably be some wardrobe malfunctions. Close enough?

PoignancySelz November 5, 2009 at 2:35 pm

If they want attention and we want images, how about someone sending a 20 foot silver mylar balloon with something dangling from below over the Capitol?

InKnockYouUs November 5, 2009 at 2:51 pm

[re=451182]Come here a minute[/re]:

“Earlier out on the lakebed, team member Nick Burrows had pointed out how it grips the cable with modified skateboard wheels and the laser is aimed with an X Box game controller.”

Now they have space elevators run by X box controllers, what’s next?

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