THEY’LL HAVE TO GIVE THE MAGAZINE COVER BACK TO JAY LENO: “In Touch Weekly’s gamble on Sarah Palin didn’t pay off. The magazine paid $100,000 for a cover story on the former Alaska governor and her daughter, Bristol, for the current issue. But, despite Palin’s huge book sales and TV ratings, sources said In Touch sold about 500,000 copies on newsstands, about half the number it sold a few weeks ago with the late Brittany Murphy on the cover.” Got it, Sarah? You’ll have to DIE if you want to keep that price quote so high. [NY Post]
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{ 36 comments }
I think Palin is just saving up money to buy an island in the South Pacific somewhere. A few more stories in People and she’ll be gone from our live for good!
“I have no problem with that.”
M. Bluth
Bristol Palin has got her some big hooters.
It’s like rain on your wedding day. It’s a traffic jam, when you’re already late. It’s a magazine called “In Touch” running a cover with Sarah Palin.
Please don’t fix the image. There’s a certain existential sublimity to the white question mark housed in it’s tiny blue box among a predatory sea of white. The sort of thing the samurai might consider as he contemplates seppuku.
Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
Finally, Sarah has an excuse to dump that bastard-farm of a slut daughter for holding her back. Sorry, Bris, it’s God’s plan.
Boy, I tell you what, man, that dang ol’ Peggy Hill, man, she ain’t never gonna outsell her dead ol’ daughter Luanne’s mag’zeen, I tell you what!
Oh man oh man, sheet…
[re=497923]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: Do you have any idea how much a Tattoo costs these days?!
Successful book tour? I haven’t heard jack about that mess since early December.
This just means Sarah needs to take desperate measures to stay in the limelight which in this case is the more fun part for us.
I never would’ve believed that In Touch readers were a more discerning crowd than the teabaggers. Now I’m frightened.
Sarah’s stock is really down today. She abandoned a promising political career to embark upon an easy “celebrity for it’s own sake” life journey. Someone should have warned her that Americans can be cruel when they decide that you belong with yesterday’s garbage.
[re=497926]pampl[/re]: Only the last sentence is ironic. The other two are just examples of a bummer.
This can only mean that InTouch readers are a bunch a Jews.
Palin is soooooooo 2009.
That’s nothing. How much do you think she’s charging Walnuts! for the help on the campaign?
I wonder how much she charges for one of her old Q-Tips. I could probably afford that.
[re=497923]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: But it would be a foreign country and the natives would be dark-skinned like the foreign country of Hawaii, which Sarah thought was icky.
[re=497923]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: Once she convinces herself she’s God, then yes, she will have gone the full Adi Da, holing up in a Fijian island, getting fat, and fucking as many followers as possible (for their own spiritual good).
BTW: In Touch Weekly’s average circulation (including mail subscribers) is 890,000.
Readers wanted more photos of Trig in the buff.
Oh, great.
The “Freaky Friday” and “Two and a Half Men” ad is back up.
How long until she moves to Massachusetts, poses nude, and runs for Senator?
To be fair, the article on Sarah and Bristol wasn’t very well written. However, the article preceding it, “Nick Cannon: from rapper to radio host!” and proceeding it, “The Biggest Loser: What you didn’t see!” were pretty fucking fantastic and very well researched!
Dear Palins,
STFU.
[re=497945]Extemporanus[/re]: Dunno. Can you still buy midgets on the open market?
[re=498003]Escape Goat Nation[/re]: I liked the article, “8 New Ways to Use Velveeta in The Bedroom”.
[re=497997]Decker[/re]: Thought Bristol was in Connecticut…
At least they had a choice.
While I, like most great Americans, would like to see Palin off herself with an injection of heroin to her eyeball, let’s face it, Scott Brown has shown the way. For Palin to be taken seriously, she has to pose nude.
[re=497931]ella[/re]: Depends upon what you want to do to the cow.
[re=498119]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: what a revoltin’ development
[re=498119]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: No, Bristol has to pose nude.
oh please oh please oh please
[re=497925]Larry Fine[/re]: Yeah she does, I would have bought the magazine if she were topless.
[re=498022]S.Luggo[/re]: For “caulking”? Ant bait? Hanging movie posters? Wonder what the other 5 are.
What a whore/hypocrite. If she had her way neither she or her scag slut of a daughter would have had a choice. But 1g smackers–mmmmmm we like.
[re=498208]Fuck Toad[/re]: Sorry, the GOP will not take Bristol seriously until she pumps out a least two more illegitimate kids.
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