MUSLINS TRY TO TEABAG OTHER MUSLINS: “A high level Pakistani diplomat has been rejected as Ambassador of Saudi Arabia because his name, Akbar Zib, equates to ‘Biggest Dick’ in Arabic. Saudi officials, apparently overwhelmed by the idea of the name, put their foot down and gave the idea of his being posted there, the kibosh.” Wow, self-conscious much, Saudi Arabia? Any reason to be scared of a lil’ measuring contest? [Foreign Policy]
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Authors
Wonkette Jr. (623)
Kirsten Boyd Johnson (796)
Jim Newell (5418)
Kaia Mursi (43)
Garrett Quinn (13)
Liz Colville (94)
Ken Layne (6695)
Blair Burke (170)
Matt Langer (40)
Arielle Fleisher (385)
{ 52 comments }
The royal family was recently asked about this by Zib Araq. Get it? Araq being the arabic word for sweat? Don’t you guys know anything?
So, what’s Arabic for ‘Naughtius Maximus’?
Dick Swett weeps for you, Akbar. Oh wait — those aren’t tears.
And here, I would think that they rejected him for being named after a Star Wars character that’s been turned into an overused internet meme.
By the way, it’s good not to accept a guy named “biggest dick” – it’s a trap!
There’s “biggest dick,”
and there’s biggest “dick!!!”
Which is it here?
Selecting diplomats for dick size went out with the last administration.
Suicide bombers should adopt “Akbar zib!” in place of “Allahu Akbar!” when they set off their explosives. I mean, in a deeper sense, isn’t this what suicide bombing is all about?
Today, we are all Akbar Zib.
Dick Swett, co-chair of the Committee of the Unfortunately Monikered, could not be reached for comment.
And his parents were thinking…?
He has a wife, you know.
What happens to the ad to the left with the “before” and “after” mommy about “obeying the anicent (sic) rule”? The “before” mommy was much sexier. The “after” mommy would clearly be high-maintenance, which is not sexy.
The original article is a joy to read in translation.
Big, yes, but is it vermiform?
Biggus Dickus and Admiral Akbar do not approve.
I wondered why Harry Balz and Mike Hunt dropped out of the State Dept. I paged both at Love Field in Dallas the day I got out of the Army, but they were nowhere to be found. The Braniff operator had a bigger Texas accent than LBJ and kept after them for a couple hours, bless her heart.
Every Muslim I know has at least six different names. He couldn’t reach in to the ol’ moniker grab bag and pick a new one?
[re=508487]Judas Peckerwood[/re]:
Pakistan’s main language is Urdu, a different language than Arabic.
So Cheney’s secret Arab name is Akbar Zib?
How ironic given that many in the Saudi royal family were perfectly comfortable cozying up with Dick Cheney whose name in Arabic translates as Dick Cheney.
[re=508475]JMP[/re]: It’s a FAP!
[re=508497]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: what’s arabic for average? 6?
Even the ragheads have their own Long Dong Silver. Bless.
[re=508489]naveed[/re]: I was going to ask if he was available. Bah.
Wonder what Jeff means in Arabic.
It also didn’t help that he was filmed taking part in “Sexy Burka Bitches, Vol. 4.”
[re=508491]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: The guy’s credentials were “the biggest cock?” Well, no wonder.
[re=508499]Cape Clod[/re]:
اكبر الأحمق ديك صغي
Why are you all laughing? He is wewwy big in Wome!
Mr. Dick just launched an exploratory committee for the 2012 Republican nomination.
Wait till Biggus Dickus hears of this!
I predict that within 24 hours some Wonketteer will change their screen name to Akbar Zib. Maybe me.
Why does Saudia Arabia hate private investigators?
I heard they are replacing him with a guy named “Curley Pubes.”
[re=508504]Buzz Feedback[/re]: I was going to say, obviously this guy grew up on Zib street and his first pet was named “Akbar.”
“Saudi officials… put their foot down.” Weren’t they afraid of stepping on the head?
Also Mr. Newell, because I’m ‘that guy,’ what’s a ‘trie,’ as in our headline, above?
[re=508487]Judas Peckerwood[/re]: They definitely weren’t thinking he’d be a diplomat.
Oh Shit, that reminds me:
Don Maca Leroy from the Texas State Board of Education drops in on the Sarah Palin Show to share his thoughts on Teabaggin, also.
http://acksisofevil.org/audio/Sarah_Palin_Maca_Leroy.mp3 5 min
Staci Davis and Scooter on Inner Side Radio
I have a very gweat friend in Wome named Biggus Dickus.
Hey, arabian vocabulary quiz! If “allah akbar” means “God Is Greatest”, and “Akbar Zib” means “Biggest(Greatest) Dick”, then “Zib” means … ?
I’ve heard they’re thinking of replacing him with a woman, Akbar Titz.
His wife, Incontinentia Buttox, was terribly disappointed…
[re=508486]SmutBoffin[/re]: That’s C.ommittee for the U.nfortunately M.onikered heh heh
Seymour Butts. Also.
To be fair, my name ultimately means “offspring of cock”, and no one is preventing ME from holding a diplomatic position. If they knew what was good for them, they would prevent me, but the point is, they aren’t.
I am unable to comment without seeing the pictures first.
ZEB! His name is Akbar Zeb, not Zib!
Sheesh. Y’all are gonna get this wrong and you’ll regret it, like the next time you go into a Saudi hustler bar and yell “I wanna suck some zib!”, some camel jockey stuffs a prangskin in your mouth, and the next thing you know they’re burying you alive. Well you were warned.
[re=508475]JMP[/re]: “By the way, it’s good not to accept a guy named “biggest dick” – it’s a trap!”
I know, I found that out from manhunt too.
[re=508491]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: There are some gems there. This is one:
“the biggest cock ambassador requires dissemination”
“His Highness Sheikh who carried (the biggest cock) presents his compliments to the people of Pakistan” (at least they complimented him: maybe they were just saying they didn’t know how to accommodate such a giant cock, and would like Pakistan to send a more manageable dick).
But here’s the best one, and it doesn’t even have the word cock:
“The Pakistani officials have admitted there was tension with the new U.S. administration, but they attributed that to the tense atmosphere of what they described as American arrogance and provocations such as taking photographs in sensitive areas and lack of understanding of the size”
Long Dong Silver for Pres in 2012! John Holmes VP! Jesse Ventura Sec’y of State!
AKBAR ZIB: biggest dick….or greatest dick?
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