Uh oh! Somebody found the playbook, and it’s full of secret, evil GOP strategies that have been obvious to any human being who’s watched any half-second of any news coverage at any point in the last 30 to 200 million years. Although the Scooby Doo imagery is new, hadn’t considered that yet.
The Republican National Committee plans to raise money this election cycle through an aggressive campaign capitalizing on ‘fear’ of President Barack Obama and a promise to ‘save the country from trending toward socialism.’
The strategy was detailed in a confidential party fundraising presentation, obtained by POLITICO, which also outlines how ‘ego-driven’ wealthy donors can be tapped with offers of access and ‘tchochkes.’”
Whoa whoa whoa, let’s slow down. That’s not exactly true, Ben Smith. It actually says “Tchochkes!!!!!!!!!!” That is ten exclamation points. The precise number on the slideshow could be anywhere from 7 to 13. It’s hard to count exclamation points when they’re all in a row like that.
The presentation explains the Republican fundraising in simple terms.
“What can you sell when you do not have the White House, the House, or the Senate…?” it asks.
The answer: “Save the country from trending toward Socialism!”
SOCIALISM? GRRRR! ME FIND CHECKBOOK.
RNC Document Mocks Donors, Plays on ‘Fear’ [Ben Smith]
{ 98 comments }
tchochkes? sounds communist…
Hmm…anyone else find it strange that the RNC would misspell “De Vil”?
I have to say their graphics dept. must consist of one guy with a degree in communications from Liberty U, a 6 year old Dell and dialup. Also, I really don’t get the Scooby Doo reference at all–either how he is supposed to resemble Harry Reid (?) or what that has to do with socialism. Are Scooby Snacks a sort of bolshevik currency that go to each according to their needs?
[re=524090]Red Zeppelin[/re]: Yeah, somewhere along the line they missed the part about Scooby Doo being a good guy who caught criminals.
Heh! I remember my first powerpoint presentation.
I don’t get the American Gothic thing? Congressional leaders as hardworking honest simple agrarian icon : bad? yeah they don’t look like much fun but worthy of ridicule? seems a tad un-American.
tchokes? maybe they should just appeal to the normal republican urges? A cd of kiddie porn and some spray tan scented like a public urinal
[re=524090]Red Zeppelin[/re]: The Republicans see incompetence as a selling point to their base. Makes them look just like reg’lar folks.
You know – like using your palm as a “poor man’s teleprompter”.
I remember Paul Tchochkes. Got his butt kicked in the primaries by Clinton, didn’t he? Whatever happened to that guy?
A major Republican donor described the state of the RNC’s relationship with major donors as “disastrous,” with veteran givers beginning to abandon the committee, which is becoming increasingly reliant on small donors.
Oh, it would be such a shame if they spent all their money on Scott Brown and then couldn’t afford the national elections that are coming up in November. Who knew that your donor base would abandon you after you did nothing for them and then called them rubes? It’s like they don’t love America anymore.
[re=524086]carlgt1[/re]: Sounds communist — looks like crappy spelling.
Wow, that Politico sure gets the scoops. I wonder if they know whether or not Hopey is planning to run again in 2012; or if hes ALREADY planning it! ohhh boy. I will keep checking every Morning and Afternoon. I will let you all know what they uncover next!
Glad to see the article mentioned Michael Steele, even if Smith had to use the “comes-at-a-time-when” device to get his name associated with this debacle, which one again proves this axiom:
Major gaffe = telling the truth
Does that mean Chuck Schumer is Shaggy? Perhaps Velma?
Sssssshhhhhh! No one tell the GOP that presenting San Francisco Gay Commie Nancy and Sin City Harry as iconic (though quietly subversive) Middle Americans has literally gotten their main critique of liberals exactly backwards! I need lower healthcare costs.
[re=524102]V572625694[/re]: Meant to say, “wuntz again”
ZZOOIINNKKSS‽‽‽‽‽‽‽‽‽‽
It’s comical how their bungholes pucker up when they’re caught in the act of being their normal selves.
[re=524092]Jim Newell[/re]: I was going to give major props to Politico for doing actual reporting and printing something that hurts the RNC — until I ran across this:
The RNC reacted with alarm to a question about it Thursday, emailing major donors to warn them of a reporter’s question, and distancing Steele from its contents.
They’ve been sitting on this damn story for almost a week?! What the hell? Next we’ll find out they only ran with the story because their source got sick of waiting and was floating the .ppt to other outlets.
[re=524094]cheeto_jeebus[/re]: Seriously, this is totally perplexing to me, too.
“Hey middle america! Would you rather vote for us, or a bunch of ignorant farmers?”
[re=524097]Inadequate Blackmail[/re]: Heh, I remember in grade school deciding that Paul Tsongas was my primary pick. I can’t really imagine what my 11-year-old’s reason was, or why I cared about the Democratic Primary… I think I was fascinated with the silent T. One thing’s for sure–I was fucking weird.
[re=524111]Oldskool[/re]: They would’ve gotten away with it, if it weren’t for you meddling kids!
Communications director Doug Heye said “Fundraising documents are often controversial.” Uh, no, Doug, they’re not.
[re=524092]Jim Newell[/re]: Not only that. The Scooby gang specialized in unmasking aging greed heads who were trying to scare people into getting rid of their property. Maybe the Democrats should embrace this.
I may have run across the reason for Scooby being there. From the comments at CNN:
“Is it just me, or is anyone else having trouble saying the guy’s name without sounding like Scooby-Doo, or the Jetson’s dog Astro?”
(pause)
(facepalm)
[re=524089]Lorax[/re]: Yeah, it totally tanks any possibility of clever “Coup De Vil” jokes.
On the other hand, “101 Demnations” is still in play.
Slide 32 of 72 is particularly revealing.
http://www.politico.com/static/PPM136_100303_rnc_finance_leadership.html
[re=524112]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Good catch.
Ruh roh!
Maybe they should offer wealthy GOP donors butt plugs, adult diapers and Truck-Nutz instead.
WOW! The RNC really is out of touch if they think that Scooby Doo and American farmers are the bad guys.
it’s revolting these are basically 5th graders and quite frequently they have the power to start wars, kill people, impoverish people etc.
Speaking of funny name, slide 33: “Ambassador Turpeluk”. Ambassador to where, Vulcan?
Oh, wait, google says “Luxembourg”. Way to bring it home with the hard-hitting foreign policy connections, RNC! Coalition of the willing!
hahahaha check out page 10 of the powerpoint:
“In 2009 the RNC raised a total of $81,225,000 million”
Too bad the dittohead dopes hate math & science so much!
Who the fuck could disrespect Scooby-Doo? C’mon, all the lame kids shows out there…Barney, Teletubbies, Mozart for Retards. You could burn the lot, really, but Scooby rocks. It goes to show how reptilean these RNC clowns are…
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=skycycle+it%27s+terror+time+again&search_type=&aq=0&oq=skycycle
They call their base of regular (not the rich) donors reactionary and afraid. I love it.
http://www.politico.com/static/PPM136_100303_rnc_finance_leadership.html
page 10 of 72 is hilarious: “raised a total of $81,255,000 million”
gee, those elitists raised $81.255 trillion and they’re whining about Obama spending a measily $1 trillion?
“Fundraising documents are often controversial.”
Especially things like sexy pictures with notes attached asking for monies.
Did they include that super funny picture of watermelons growing on the White House lawn?? That will bring in the big bucks.
Worse yet, are the comments. Well, worse thing since that OTP drivel from yesterday.
[re=524137]carlgt1[/re]: Page 17: “23% of Self-Indentified [sic] Voters are Republican”
Proofreading FAIL.
Reagan did the best Scooby Doo. Ruh Roh Raggy! Riran Contra! To which VP Shaggy would reply Zoinks!
Lotsa socialism in Scooby Doo’s Adventures on the Green Acres of Kenya.
“What can you sell when you do not have the White House, the House, or the Senate…?”
Assholism.
I guess Scooby Doo is bad because he hangs around with that hippy Shaggy?
[re=524143]President Beeblebrox[/re]: Is self-indentifying something to do with buttplugs?
Slide #28 seems to imply their “support staff” is a bunch of hookers.
FEAR AND KNOW noTHINGism ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL ’010
If I’d been going for a Grant Wood painting, I probably would’ve picked “Death on the Ridge Road” to illustrate the prospects for this magnificent campaign.
We would have gotten away with a capital gains tax and bombing Iran if it weren’t for you meddling kids.
Needs more fake George Washington.
[re=524122]gurukalehuru[/re]: I noticed that too, and just assumed that they were reporting from the FUTURE.
[re=524118]slavojzizek[/re]: This. This is why “Scooby Doo” is such a slur. There’s nothing that wanna-be-a-plutocrat old white hillbilly fucktards fear more than the sight of that Great Dane, and his faithful, constantly-baked companion.
“Yes, I tried to fleece the American People. And I woulda gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for you meddling libs, and your stupid Senate Majority Leader!”
Harry Reid sure looks a lot like the guy in the actual painting. Not sure anyone would notice the difference.
Haha oh wow. The comments on the Politico story are fantastically well thought out, extensively researched, and intelligently argued. One such comment literally reads as follows: “Obama is a socialist. Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!”
I have no idea why this commenter orgasmed before he could finish writing his post. I’m roughly 60% certain that I don’t want to find out.
This EXACT APPEAL won over Lady Lynn Forester de Rothschild
This is what leadership looks like, beeotches.
[re=524098]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Given how expensive guns are, I suspect half the right wing donateable money went there and the rest for unpaid leave to wait in line to get close enough to Sarah Starbursts to piss their pants.
[re=524098]SayItWithWookies[/re]: The major donors and ex-repubs who still like balanced budgets need to form a new party. Let the religious fanatics and the know-nothings and the racists tear each other to bits. No one will miss the Republican Party, any more than they miss the Whigs or Federalists.
[re=524125]MarSF[/re]: Has anyone come up with a Michael Steele butt-plug yet? I assume that Rush and Palin butt-plugs are already in play.
“What can you sell when you do not have the White House, the House, or the Senate…?”
I’ll give you a clue. It takes place in the men’s bathroom at the airport and rhymes with “No Job.”
So, I got from the enemy page…The Joker, bad, Farmers/Grant Wood, bad, but where do they stand on talking, crime-thwarting dogs? Dalmations good, scooby bad????
I STILL don’t get the Hopey joker poster. Are they trying to say that Hopey is a methed-out abused kid running around taking out the mob and the government (judges, DAs, police, etc) because they won’t smile?
[re=524177]Redhead[/re]: It’s because in the extended DVD version of the “Black Knight”, it’s revealed that the Joker read one of Bill Ayer’s books and was so inspired he went to Cuba to be trained by Fidel Castro and Jeremiah Wright on how to rig bombs into things like the belly of fellow jail mates, hospitals, and ferry boats. Also because wingnuts are retarded
That PPT’s “Empire of Evil” slide makes no sense. Cruella de Ville is part of their base.
Plus, she has a cool car.
Meh, wake me when Politico wins the morning with, “RNC plans to run fact-based, policy-driven fundraising campaign.”
I haz confusion. I’ve had a really bad day, so I could be missing something, but on slide 17, “2010 GOP Seats in Play,” it shows:
41 Senators
178 Republicans [sic] House Members
36 State Legislative Chambers
23% of Self-Identified Voters Are Republicans
There are a total of 41 GOP Senators. In each state, only one senator is up for re-election in a given year. Some states have 2 GOP senators (AZ, KY, KS for example).
Is it me?
It has begun.
The Conservative Caucus has put up a poll/fundraiser, Help Us Stop Obama’s Socialist Agenda.
Typical loaded question: Do you think President Obama will ultimately succeed in transforming America into his Socialist vision? Or do you think he will ultimately fail to achieve his goals?
No, I don’t think he will succeed in transforming America.
Yes, I think he will largely succeed.
It all depends on how much heat Congress feels from millions of pro-freedom voters and the results of the 2010 Congressional elections.
Undecided
Uh, no bullet points.
/HTML fail./
Since CNN is hiring Fox News’s cast offs, I guess it makes sense that the RNC is hiring Onion wannabes.
[re=524187]Katydid[/re]: luv you been saying this for months WTF?
Lieberman clearly represents Scrappy-Doo.
[re=524114]doxastic[/re]: Grade school… how depressing. I was already out of college by then. Anyway, Paul Tsongas died some years ago.
[re=524197]ladymacbeth[/re]: Now I am completely confused. My brain is fried, and I don’t understand you now!
Am I having an episode I never had before?
[re=524198]Decker[/re]: That’s not fair to Scrappy Doo
“Tchochkes!!!!!!!!!!” are for Czars!!!!!!!!!! We don’t need no stinking socialist Czars in the US and A.
[re=524191]Beanball[/re]: Thx 4 the link! I had fun with it, despite there not being a space for submitting Commie-luvvin’ comments.
The survey leads with a photo showing my very serious President at prayer. So not even the haters think he’s a *Godless* commie — or they do, but they’re too stupid to illustrate their own web page with a picture that matches their message.
Scoob should be running scared. Republicans are known to shoot (Huckabee’s shit dumpster sons), terrorize and torture (Mitten’s travel cage of death), and/or fuck (Santorums) dogs. The DNC should get right on this and retaliate.
[re=524206]gradgrind[/re]: no, thats just to remind people of Rev. Wright, Obamas godless commie preacher.
News with flashing lights, explosions, shout-yness and sirens tomorrow:
Obama trades judgeship for health care vote.
Ruh roh. Is Rahm Emmanuel Scrappy Doo?
Win their love with tchochkes and peeah presshah.. Oy vay!
Also, I like the 9/10 ‘Young Eagles Texas Bird Hunt’– where patriotic aviation-type children are given the chance to scout high and low for a glimpse of the tiny Republican penii that come out in public park bathrooms..
[re=524089]Lorax[/re]: They’re trying to avoid copyright infringement suits from Disney. You don’t want to mess with Disney!
OMG, I thought Jim was kidding about the exclamation points after tchotchkes! Well, talk about putting the FUN back in FUNdraising!!!!!!
[re=524198]Decker[/re]: Nah…he’s Droopy the Dog…
Scooby DON’T
[re=524191]Beanball[/re]: I lost it at “millions of pro-freedom voters.” Do these shitfuckers actually believe they’re on the pro- side of the freedom debate?
Also, you can say you won’t donate to them with your survey…but adding in a donation is required to complete your survey. I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren’t for you meddling required fields!
I heard on Diane Rehm that these asshats also sent out a fundraising letter that looks like a census form. How the fuck can they get away with shit like that?
Why does Nancy Pelosi want to make a coat out of Harry Reid’s fur?
[re=524145]Servo[/re]: “What can you sell when you do not have the White House, the House, or the Senate…?” it asks.
Apparently you stop selling and start begging.
[re=524090]Red Zeppelin[/re]: The Scooby reference is clearly because of the importance he is given in the Book of the Revelation of John, particularly the following references:
“These things saith he that holdeth the seven stars in his right hand, he that walketh in the midst of the seven golden candlesticks”
“and do the first works; or else I come to thee, and will move thy candlestick out of its place”
please note how these lines are also coded allusions to La Palin and sexual encounters in public restrooms – thus bringing it all together in one beautiful whole.
Wait! They do know why they don’t have the WH, Senate and House, don’t they?
Wait, Cruella DeVille wanted a coat made from the skins of Dalmation puppies. But Pelosi’s brain is hard-wired to the red hotline phone at PETA. I’m getting a headache from the cognitive dissonance. It is true, however, that the hero at the end of the movie sings of starting a Dalmation Plantation, so it’s true that liberals are going to make it hard for half-black/half-white creatures to achieve reparations.
I don’t get it.
Does anyone else find it significant that the “Leadership Meeting” was held in Boca Grande (which, if my school-girl Spanish does not fail me, means “Big Mouth”?)
from page 15 “…online fundraising can catch fire…”
Hmmm, too bad the Democrats didn’t use that fundraising method in the last presidential election…oh, wait.
So does this mean that they are no longer using the Obama as a witch doctor photo anymore?
I’m upset that this was leaked, because they’ll have to go back to the drawing board to get different cartoon characters. And it couldn’t POSSIBLY be worse than this.
I’m sorry, now I can’t get this horrifying image out of my head. I keep picturing Scooby Doo and Cruella De Vil teaming up, and it just never ends well. Ruh Roh!
Zoinks, Scoob…looks like it’s over…
I am confuzed. The wingtards rant about Obama’s “socialist agenda.” I’ve looked everywhere – under the couch cushion, in the garage, the attic, the floorboards of the car, called SPCA and the dog pound – and I can’t find a goddamned “socialist agenda” anywhere. It must have run off January 2009 and nobody noticed except those on the left, who have also left the house. If only there WAS a “socialist agenda” that we could get behind to defend, now, that would be a whole nuther story and we wouldn’t be laughing at Republitard’s hysterics over Obama’s moderate Republican agenda. Must be a cartoon character that would embody this? And pleeeze, Harry Reid is no Scooby. He’s more like Elmer Fudd.
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