GOD IT IS JUST SOME BASIC FIXES TO THE INDIVIDUAL INSURANCE MARKET: “Raising the bar on Republican opposition maneuvers in the Senate, Mr. Coburn on Thursday threatened to put future holds on any Democratic House members who switch their vote in favor of the health care bill, lose their election as a result next November, and then are rewarded with a high-ranking job in the Obama administration.” He’ll fuck your spouse and eat your babies, too! [NYT/The Caucus]
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{ 86 comments }
Wow he beat Bunning to the punch.
Hey, Oklahoma! Get better Senators!
Hey! Mr. Coburn, I’m sure 227 years of Senate Rules were created just so you could throw a hissie fit when you don’t get your way.
What would he have promised for vengeance if US America got Single Payer?
Sore loser.
And if they do get re-elected, they have to sit at the nerds’ table in the cafeteria at lunch. And he won’t invite them to that raging kegger he’s having this weekend while his parents are out of town.
Sheesh.
Gawd, they’re not voting on this shit until Sunday. By this time tomorrow these assholes will be threatening to line up all the Dems and shoot em’, execution style.
Could someone please re-code that quote for me? I don’t speak Visual Basic.
He’ll fuck your spouse and eat your babies, too!
Well, he would, if John Ensign and Steve King didn’t have dibs, respectively.
It’s 70 degrees, sunny, the windows are wide open, wildflowers are blooming, March Madness has started, I only have to teach one more class before spring break begins, and Tom Coburn is being beset by despair only eased with fits of impotent rage.
Today rules.
And if any vote-switchers win the lottery, he’ll introduce bills to confiscate their winnings. And if any of them meet pretty girls and want to get married, he’ll outlaw opposite marriage! He’d gay abort their babies, too, but he’s agin that.
Hope Dust Bowl Blues is here today to enjoy our mutual loathing of her state’s elected reps.
Send him some high-school age lesbians wrapped in plain brown paper and he should be distracted enough to keep him from bothering anybody. And if he wants to place a hold on something, he can start with my schwanz. Between his festering buttcrack. As you can see, I’m not particular.
The hysteria grows. I tells ya, it really sounds as though Pelosi has the votes and the Republicans know it. When does the actual foaming at the mouth stage begin?
Once again, once this thing passes (if it passes) the GOP will forget health care was ever an issue and move on to predicting apocalypse if cap and trade, labor law reform, tax reform, etc passes. Coburn is a spiteful and hateful enough son of a bitch that he probably will stick to his word on this however.
…and…so what?
Just because Coburn puts a hold on something doesn’t mean squat unless 40-some other Senators back him up. Holds, like filibusters, can be broken with a successful cloture.
The best way to shut down abuse of holds is to break a few of them.
Unless, of course, the Senate leadership just wants to look like wimps.
From his bio:
Dr. Coburn returned to Muskogee where he specializes in family medicine, obstetrics and the treatment of allergies. Dr. Coburn has personally delivered more than 4,000 babies.
Just make sure you have insurance when you see this guy. How many babies has he had to repossess?
What happens if Tom loses his reelection bid this year? How will he exact his not-so-swift and terrible revenge?
Is it a requirement that Oklahoma senators have to be the biggest assholes from that state?
Wingnuts furious! Hooray!
[re=533300]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Lets hope he would suicide bomb something in a remote area.
Say what you will about the guy, but Coburn is really, really trying here. The insurance lobby should consider their money damn well spent.
(Well, considering they spent it on an Okie.)
Yes -because nothing says “democracy” like threatening to punish people for the way they vote.
This man is not at all happy with his Flowbee.
[re=533312]qwerty42[/re]: We’re past denial, phasing between anger and bargaining. The thing is, with wingnuts, right before they get to acceptance, they loop all the way back to denial. And the circle of life continues…
I,m pretty sure I’m not going to be very happy with the final bill, if its anything short of the British socialist National Health Service. But watching Tom Coburn’s head explode will almost make up for my disappointment.
The sixth seal truly was unleashed by the outlandishly coiffed Palin, as reported by the Onion; there are doings a-transpiring and havoc strapping on and preparing to be wreaked, this much is clear. RedState’s campaign of fear-creatin’, only-slightly-illegal-violence (hey, wadda you say we try this thing I like to call “night riding?” Or there is always old number 47, we ride into town, whoopin’ and a hollerin’, and smack every uppity liberal in the face with a newspaper to within an inch of their life) combined with the biggest mass GOP hissy-fit in congress since the Clinton Impeachment, we have only seen the harbingers of the coming days, mark my words; I am betting that next week, as each of the Southern State Legislatures passes their respective unconstitutional law declaring the federal law void in their State, and as each Right Wing Loon Froth-Tank and every GOP State Attorney General files suit seeking to have the law declared unconstitutional and non-cromulent, well, its going get wacky, and its going to go on for months, till the election, for sure. And I mean this with all sincerity, some shitstain of a State is going to secede, probably Texas or South Carolina, they’re the most revolting States so I am sure they will be leading the revolt, and boy howdy, holy shit, wowee wow wow wow, this is going to be complete hilarity.
Tom Coburn is a pre-existing condition.
How about this childish tantrum tactic, Coburn; refuse to speak until the Democrats agree not to pass health reform. That one will certainly get to them. Or better yet, hold your breath until you get your way.
[re=533312]qwerty42[/re]: Read the post on the Redstate article below, and remember the teabaggers; the foaming at the mouth stage has already begun.
[re=533333]Sweet Baby Cheeses[/re]: Perhaps if he stopped using the Flowbee® Vajazzler™ attachment on his head, he’d be more pleased with the results.
[re=533321]Oblios Cap[/re]: Coburn won’t lose as long as he runs. Here, you can be a mentally challenged tapeworm and win a senate bid as long as there is an (R) next to your name. As evidence for this, I present to you our two senators.
Why can’t the Democrats act in a more bipartisan manner?
[re=533312]qwerty42[/re]: Oh, the foaming has begun, trust me. The media is just late in reporting on what I am sure is already going on in the Confederacy. Their legislatures are all batshit insane, and they will be passing writs of attainder against the offspring of anyone who votes for HCR, unto perpetuity, and laws retroactively reinstating their declarations of secession, just you watch, gosh darn it. And crazy southern judges will be enjoining the law, ands impeaching Obama, and declaring Christianity the State Religion, and declaring anathema against the democrats, and posses and militias will spring up and take positions at the borders, to keep the evil socialist death panels from coming into their state and taking their retards and olds off to the secret FEMA camps.
[re=533340]Prommie[/re]:
Mel Brookes and Richard Pryor are prophetic geniuzes.
“What did you expect? “Welcome, sonny”? “Make yourself at home”? “Marry my daughter”? You’ve got to remember that these are just simpletons. These are people of the land. The common clay of the South. You know… morons.”
This is the same guy that Obama called a Republican friend during the campaign. I think he needs some advice in that area, cause with friends like these…
I thought Hopey and Dr. Tom were supposed to be friends. If Hopey really is as “Chicago” as his critics say, then maybe it’s time old Tom’s wife hears about that “bible study” at the C Street house Tom confessed to during that lonely dark night back during their freshman year in the Senate.
This is the guy who cried in the committee room because the Democrats were being so mean and unbipartisan in their questions at Samual Alito’s confirmation hearing and why couldn’t we all just get along?
Is this guy a fucking 12 year old girl, or what?
[re=533307]doxastic[/re]: Enjoy the day and the time away.
[re=533316]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: Yup. Rage of the Day.
As another commenter said on this site once: “All the smart Okies left for California.”
[re=533304]freakishlystrong[/re]: Sunday could be a truly epic day. Like the Super Bowl when the Pats lost the Giants or whenever the Yankees lose in the playoffs, those moments when a bunch of cocky assholes yapping their heads off for months get horribly defeated and allow the rest of us to revel in their loss and, in the case of the Republicans, enjoy the sounds of their collective heads exploding. It’ll be beautiful.
Unless I just jinxed it.
[re=533340]Prommie[/re]: Trust me, if it looks like Texas might declare secession, South Carolina will do it first, even if they were otherwise content with the state of the Union. They have a reputation to uphold, after all. Me, I just hope they wait to do it until we have a different president in office. I’m worried Hopey will go all Lincoln and say “nuh-uh, not acceptable”, even if it’s only a worthless shithole like SC.
I want a top dog who will say, “Fuck you, get the fuck out, and the horse you rode in on. And don’t come asking me for any trade agreements, or any (looking at you, Texas) and I mean A DROP of fucking water. I’d tell to come on home when you’re hungry, but honestly I couldn’t give a flying fuck.” And then he diverts the Rio Grande south through Mexico, out of spite. That’s the guy I want in charge in the event of a National Break-up, and as much as I love Obama, he ain’t that guy.
[re=533349]Prommie[/re]: well, since a lot of the old CSA is having huge budget problems, it might be difficult to go completely insane (but, hey, you never know). Still, a huge lawsuit by the state AG’s office will be expensive … Maybe the Chamber of Commerce can cough up the bucks? Naw, probably up the sales tax so the po’folks can be saved from this evil socialist, nazi plan.
[re=533356]steverino247[/re]: Its rare to discover a new oxymorono, but there, right in your comment, I saw “smart okies.”
[re=533360]Zadig[/re]: And you, I love you, for this vision of a just world, one in which the leader says “buh-bye,” and the roads are blocked, and the electrical transmission lines severed, and those lovely monthly checks the olds get, the commie Social Security, as those checks are immediately cut off, oh yes, it would be grand.
So, he is basically going to abort their nominations?
How long until they will drop all pretense and just stand on Capitol steps, shouting “OBAMA AND HIS CHICAGO THUGS ARE COMING FOR YOUR GUNS AND WOMEN!! THEY WILL INSEMINATE YOUR PURE DAUGHTERS AND THEN ABORT THE FETUSES WITH A SICKLE AND SODOMIZE THEM WITH A HAMMER! AND THEY WILL SLAP YOUR GRAMMA UPSIDE THE HEAD WITH THEIR HUGE DONGS TO DEATH, AND ACORN WILL MAKE YOU PAY FOR IT ALL! OOOGABOOOOGABOOOGA! AND LIBERTY AND CAPITALISM WILL DIE, ALSO! ARHHGHGHG!!!” *froth at the mouth* *fall over*
Wait, nevermind, that’s just a transcript from yesterday’s Glenn Beck.
Question: Is there a sufficiently discourtious abuse of the Senate Special Courtesy Unofficial Hold Rule that Senators are willing to, I dunno, drop the damn thing, because people are dicks?
So Obama will just recess appoint them. Whatev!
[re=533355]Cape Clod[/re]: That’s an insult to 12 year old girls everywhere.
[re=533351]ManchuCandidate[/re]: That was Cleavon Little – who died of Colon Cancer before there were as many warnings and diagnostic procedures as there are now. Also, he didn’t have decent health insurance.
[re=533319]Schmegeg[/re]: Yes, next time my vagina is all swollen and and full of allergic pustules I shall know who to call.
[re=533355]Cape Clod[/re]: Wasn’t he also the Mr. Professional Dr. Guy who diagnosed poor Terry Shiavo via a 10-minute video? Because he could magically diagnose her by just looking at her for a few minutes? Why doesn’t this piece of crap just go away and die?
[re=533376]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: That was Bill Frist – former Republican Senate Majority Leader. Frist was a great humanitarian. He performs heat surgery on gorillas for free – but blocked SCHIP for two years.
[re=533376]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: That was the equally badly coiffed and hideous Dr Bill Frist.
[re=533344]Extemporanus[/re]: Yeah, he might have grabbed that one by accident. He thought he was reaching for the Okla-homo™. Honest mistake.
[re=533373]One Toke Over The Line[/re]:
Yes, but Richard Pryor was one of the writers.
[re=533376]BlueStateLiberal[/re]: As others said above, it was Bill Frist. I can’t blame you for screwing these guys up, though. I mean, come on. Has there been ONE combination OB/GYN-Congressperson that also managed to be a decent human being, in our nation’s history?
[re=533349]Prommie[/re]: In other words, old time Southern Jihad.
[re=533362]Prommie[/re]: We fixed that by calling them Californians as soon as they crossed the border. And started working in the fields (oil and agricultural), of course.
[re=533340]Prommie[/re]: [re=533361]qwerty42[/re]: Since there are 37 (at last count) states threatening lawsuits is HCR passes, and since it’s more broke-down, backwards ones and they can’t afford their own lawyers (no lawyer I know would be dumb enough to take this on 30% contingency) they’ll decide to save time and money by joining in a class action suit against the Federal Govt and get their day in court.
Well, maybe 1/2 day in court. Shouldn’t much longer that that to dismiss. They’ll be out in time for lunch.
[re=533388]Zadig[/re]: Frist and his daddy made their fortune turning non-profit hospitals into for profit ones and then competing against the non-profit ones (no wonder the nuns have sided with Obama) with the Hospital Corporation of America. This enterprise, not exactly free since heavily subsidized by the govt., contributed mightily to the cost horror we have today. After their private their death for hire empire was merged Columbia health care, it was discovered that Columbia HCA, headed by anti-health zealot, Rick Scott, had defrauded Medicare and Medicaid ( government run health insurance plans, gasp) of billions of dollars. The were fined $1.7 billion, the largest Medicare fraud fine in history.
Man, that’s one doc I’m not gonna see.
“Loose some weight and stop smoking or I’ll put a hold on your daughter’s marriage!”
Prick.
[re=533363]Lionel Hutz Esq.[/re]: Nope. Sterilized without prior consult.
“First do much harm”
The only problem with the South seceding from the United States is that they have all those Toyota auto plants down there that could be converted to build tanks for the insurrection. Of course, they will be prone to sudden acceleration and braking problems.
From a commenter on Balloon Juice:
“Resolution to bar deem and pass loses 222-203”
A number of blue dogs voted “aye”. Hysteria will be the standard all weekend.
[re=533319]Schmegeg[/re]: Only Father Gabriele Amorth knows for sure.
[re=533383]Sweet Baby Cheeses[/re]: Ah yes, the Okla-homo™: “Business in the front, purty in the back.”
[re=533426]Extemporanus[/re]: Thanks for asking “What’s the Nazi Pope and his Global Church of Child Fuckers up to these days, anyway?” Desides lying about health care reform?
[re=533388]Zadig[/re]: Yeah… two big red flags when judging someone’s character are (1) a man who wants to be an OB/GYN and (2) anyone who wants political power. Not that there aren’t fine people in both categories… but yes, red flags. And One Yield Regular, yes, His plan to punish people for voting, in a democracy, is the third and final flag, though the douchy hair would have been enough for me.
Anyway, I’m impressed with the Dems for getting this close. If they actually pass this thing, I’m going to start voting for them again regularly. I did vote for Barry, but that was mainly because Palin is so superstitious and poorly educated. I would have considered Walnuts/Mittens, or some far left Green, or blown it off altogether since I’m an expat and it’s a pain to vote. I’m one of those “ugh they are all the same” types.
But… wow. This really is epic. For all the complaining that Dems are spineless, they’ve held their ground like fucking champs. I know the bill isn’t perfect, but the fact that the party, specifically the people in that party, who wanted Palin in a position of power is *this* upset leads me to believe that it may actually be full of win. Their desperation is my multivitamin. Every time Matt Drudge posts a deliberately unflattering picture of Pelosi or Clinton, as if this will convince us they are less worthy of respect than a gracefully aging beauty queen like Palin, it hardens my resolve. They think they can sway us with Botox and plastic surgery, or with Glenn Beck’s circular reasoning, or the threats of Senator Coburn and the Tea Bag Revolutionaries, to destroy our democracy and punish those who believe in it. Fat chance, fuckers. It’s just giving cynical old farts like me a reason to believe again.
[re=533433]friendlyskies[/re]: Yes, this is looking good. Still cannot be sure, but certainly has been a hard slog. FWIW, MattY had an interesting article (including graph!) that shows how the Dems are always split and suggests why it is so difficult to get them to do things in any kind of organized way (the Republicans are not troubled by such a split).
[re=533411]Ducksworthy[/re]: Just another dirty little secret buried inside this mess. The hospitals and health administration corporations have had a free skate on this whole thing. HCA and its ilk are NOT insurance companies, they own the buildings and pay the nurses, but they get paid by the insurance companies and Medicare and their CEO’s rake it in — usually under the cover of not-for-profit. There are plenty of pigs at the trough, and a lot of them are anonymous. This bill entrenches all these butt secksers, but I can’t wait to see Lush Rimjob move to Costco Rico and all the rabid Fox.
Ha, I WAS looking forward to affordable health care but not now. Now I’m looking forward to a health care bill just to watch these wonderful public meltdowns. We really should send these jackasses a monthly stipend for their tireless jackassedness.
We need more foreign doctors and less Oklahomans.
[re=533411]Ducksworthy[/re]:
That $1.7B didn’t put them out of business. Sounds impressive, though.
“He’ll fuck your spouse”
Seeing as this guy is a Republican, that should read that he’ll f$%k your husband in a stall in the men’s room at Union Station or Minneapolis Airport, whichever is closer.
[re=533359]Hooray For Anything[/re]: Might have. Never celebrate until the buzzer sounds dude
[re=533316]Manos: Hands of Fate[/re]: Exactly right.I’ve saying that myself for eight months but nooooooooo,they had to wait til the horse heads, baby fingers and bribes all got mailed out.
Jim Newell, can we get some pictures here of The Nuns beating the shit out of the Gay Archbishops with rulers and whips or do I have to go to off off off Broadway for that? I’m too hung over and tired of answering sad hysterical emails about Communism and a movement to remove Obama bumper stickers.
[re=533349]Prommie[/re]: Your posts are funny, but you know, I laugh to keep from crying. Two Novembers ago, I never suspected this.
Jim, how dare you put this in context with your clever blog title? I was rather enjoying all the grandma-killing, baby-aborting, Socialist Armageddon fireworks.
Isn’t it time senators and congressmen started having duels again? Shooting each when they get too annoying?
[re=533346]Capricatony[/re]: No chance he’ll get caught in flagrante with a 13 year old colored?
Ya know, Coburn might have run a company, been in the U.S. Congress and Senate, married Miss OK, survived cancer twice, is an ordained holier-than-thou, been a family practice/OB doctor (like Doogie Howser!) and delivered 4000 precious little gifts from the crater, but you know what impresses me? SEVENTY THOUSAND EXORCISMS. That priest, and he’s not even a bishop or cardinal or Vatican-keeper of the boys, should be the one piping in about HCR.
And I like to put a hold on any member of Congress who votes AGAINST healthcare reform and then gets free rent from those freaks at C Street.
[re=533388]Zadig[/re]: You know, most places in the world, OB-Gyne doctors are women. Why would anyone trust these guys with their most intimate bits?
[re=533433]friendlyskies[/re]: Well said. I’ll never understand the wingnut women’s obsession with Palin, groveling that “she’s so pretty.” Well so is that stripper your husband likes down at the “gentlemen’s club,” you wouldn’t want her to be VP, would you?
[re=533433]friendlyskies[/re]: “Their desperation is my multivitamin”, okay, I know it’s corny, but I feel like Bogie standing in the mist – this could be the start of a beautiful friendship…
[re=533364]AxmxZ[/re]: That was, dare I say it, awe-inspiring.
For some reason, this posting reminded me of the Henny Youngman joke, “Last time I saw my doctor, he told me to take off all my clothes and stand by the window. When I asked him why he wanted me to stand by the window, he said, ‘I hate my neighbor.’”
More evidence that Oklahoma exists only to make Texas look sane.
Doesn’t this guy have a major scandal on his hands as pimp du jour to Ensign? I say bring out the dirty pictures of Senator douchebag.
[re=533445]Radiotherapy[/re]: Working in one of these HCA hospitals is a nightmare. The patients are usually too unsophisticated, poor, and ignorant to know the difference. They skimp on basic supplies, they don’t provide support staff for the nurses, they push nurse-patient ratios to the unsafe levels, they let the physical facilities run into the ground, &c. Maintenance isn’t done, equipment is not maintained or is in short supply, and the place can be a real dump. The single housekeeper (there may only be one on day shift) can’t keep the entire facility clean, either. They depend on a lot of Asian – Philipino – or African RNs to work there, who don’t know the difference and are getting their visas that way.
(nurse, current midwife)
[re=533319]Schmegeg[/re]: I can just guess what kind of OB this douchebag was/is. One of those old white male MDs who never kept current with research or improvements in best practices. Probably was/is a patronizing bastard to women, who never told them about contraception or abortion, probably told them birth control and abortion are against god and their female nature, and are inherently evil, so he will not prescribe them or give referrals. He probably acted as if the husband is the main decision maker in her health care decisions as head of the house, not her. He probably told them, tough shit if you get severe preeclampsia or any of a number of complications that could endanger the mother’s life, that there is a special place in heaven for women who die in childbirth. I hope he actually referred complicated pregnancies to someone competent like a perinatologist (if he is a family practice MD doing OB, he HAS to do this). He probably induced every single woman, kept them tied to the bed with monitors and doped up on IV drugs or epidurals. I also will betcha he cuts episiotomies on every single goddamn patient. His patients are probably like his constituents: ignorant uneducated Jeebus freaks with IQs of 100 or less and they believe every word he says.
Sorry no snark here. I would like to personally deliver a large bag of poisoned rat dicks to every OB like him, tie him to the delivery table, and shove forceps up his arse after cutting a huge episiotomy (or sphincterectomy). Revenge fantasy of the leftist OB nurse, what can I say …
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