FOR THE RECORD: Richard Wolffe was not getting shot down by Austrian chicks while clubbing in Vienna. He was totally scoring at Smith Point, bitches. It’s the accent — guh-rowl!

(Kidding, Richard! Kidding!)

Earlier: Richard Wolffe Hates the Continent Right Back

Demonstrating conclusively that they don’t actually read anything not written by Dan Balz, Jim VandeHei, Adam Nagourney, Adam Liptak, or themselves, the Note today offers this tantalizing question:

A Note Notebook to the first person who can tell us why Karl Rove was at O’Hare last Friday afternoon around 6pm ET. Karl Rove and members of his staff are not eligible.

So, free “Note Notebook” to anyone who, well, reads Chicago newspapers. Or does a damn Google News search. Here’s a must-read from this obscure little rag called the Sun-Times:

Bush, Rove coming here

The White House is expected to announce today that President Bush, with the lowest approval ratings of his presidency, will travel to Chicago on Monday to deliver an address to try to bolster support for the Iraqi war.
[…]
Meanwhile, Karl Rove, Bush’s chief political adviser, is the keynoter at a fund-raiser tonight to benefit Lake County Republicans in north suburban Lincolnshire.

Major paper in one of the largest cities in the country? Sure. But this “Lynn Sweet” character was decidedly not at that amazing party the Saudi Ambassador threw last week.

The Note
Senate OKs Letting Poles Visit US Without Visas [Sun-Times, 2nd item]

Do you want to write a must-read? Sure, we all do! Guess what? It’s not as hard as you think! Here are some tips from your buddies at Wonkette:

• Write for either the Times or the Post.
• Be friends with or write about friends of The Note.

It’s that simple! Let’s take a look at two people who did it right this weekend:

Adam Nagourney’s Sunday piece on THE INTERNET (you know, “Wireless Telegraphy Injects Sweeping Change Into U.S. Politics”) was an insightfully boffo paradigm-shifting look at how THE INTERNET makes things DIFFERENT in NEW and EXCITING ways! Bam! Note link.

And in the snake-eating-its-own-tail-while-participating-in-the-biggest-circle-jerk-ever department, Campbell Brown maid-of-honor Anne Kornblut’s piece, “I Only Have Twenty Minutes to Write the Most Obvious Column Ever, Quick, Lemme Quote Everyone Else at the Palm,” was, according to some observers, crafted in a sterile, state-of-the-art laboratory staffed by scientists working day and night to perfect the Note must-read formula. It features:

• OED Citation
• Merriam-Webster expert quotation
• Safire with the political/historical context (and a “nattering nabobs” ref!)
• Halperin with the color
• Gang of 500! Gang of 500! Gang of 500!
• Further evidence that quoting Kos = the new quoting Carville

But sometimes, even platonically ideal obviousness isn’t enough — both of these pieces got their deserved links today, but the Note decided to go “quirky” and lead with a list of Bush’s first pitches. Like, baseball-wise. Ok, this Daylight Savings Time thing has thrown us off our A-Game too, guys, but seriously? And “NC2A”? THAT ACRONYM IS NOT ANY SHORTER THAN THE UNIVERSALLY ACCEPTED ONE, GUYS. YOU’RE JUST DOING IT TO BUG US NOW, AREN’T YOU.

Politics Faces Sweeping Change via the Web [NYT]
The Peculiar Power of the Chattering Class [NYT]
The Note

• Reliable Source: Mark McKinnon compiles the Gang of 500’s favorite music… CBS considers a drama about Washington lawyers. [WP]
• Inside the Beltway: Sen. Robert Byrd welcomes spring: “Lovely, lovely spring. It takes a cold heart indeed not to love the springtime.” [WT]