What’s In a Name?

Sometimes it pays to read an article all the way through. This gem was buried deep in a lengthy Times piece about fraudulent claims for Hurricane Katrina relief:

One Louisiana Department of Labor clerk, Wayne P. Lawless, has been charged with issuing about 80 fraudulent disaster unemployment benefit cards in exchange for bribes of up to $300 per application. Mr. Lawless, a state contract worker, announced to one man he helped apply for hurricane benefits that he wanted to “get something out of it,” the affidavit said.

For all you vocab junkies out there, this is kinda like an aptronym.

‘Breathtaking’ Waste and Fraud in Hurricane Aid [NYT]

READ MORE: crime, fraud, hurricane katrina, hurricane katrina relief, katrina

Zen and the Art of Federal Emergency Management

When FEMA was absorbed into the greater Homeland Security apparatus, the protocol for immediate disaster relief operations changed. An event labeled an “incident of national significance” — like Hurricane Katrina — meant an automatic realignment of bureaucratic hierarchy, and Michael Brown was technically demoted before he should have been fired. The Washington Post snagged some 80 e-mails which were furiously sent back and forth among now-high-profile incompetents, who also don’t talk so good:

“Demote the Under Sec to PFO [Principal Federal Officer]?” an outraged FEMA press secretary Sharon Worthy wrote Brown at 10:54 p.m., soon after Chertoff’s decision. “What about the precedent being set? What does this say about executive management and leadership in the Agency?”

“Exactly,” replied Brown, then-under secretary for preparedness and response…

I don’t think those were rhetorical questions, Mike. Unless your true genius lies in being mystically laconic. You know, signing off e-mails with sayings like, “You must learn to master your fear or else fear will become your master.”

Though it’s probably the old rule about making a copy of a copy — it always comes out with greater dither and less resolution — that governs any attempt to make a crony of a crony:

“Let them play their raindeer [sic] games as long as they are not turning around and tasking us with their stupid questions. None of them have [sic] a clue about emergency management,” [Brooks] Altshuler [Brown’s deputy chief of staff] told Brown and Brown’s chief of staff, Patrick Rhode.

Freudian slip on that “raindeer,” huh? —MICHAEL WEISS

Messages Depict Disarray in Federal Katrina Response [WaPo]

READ MORE: fema, hurricane katrina relief, hurricane katrina relief, michael brown, new orleans, washington post

Zen and the Art of Federal Emergency Management

When FEMA was absorbed into the greater Homeland Security apparatus, the protocol for immediate disaster relief operations changed. An event labeled an “incident of national significance” — like Hurricane Katrina — meant an automatic realignment of bureaucratic hierarchy, and Michael Brown was technically demoted before he should have been fired. The Washington Post snagged some 80 e-mails which were furiously sent back and forth among now-high-profile incompetents, who also don’t talk so good:

“Demote the Under Sec to PFO [Principal Federal Officer]?” an outraged FEMA press secretary Sharon Worthy wrote Brown at 10:54 p.m., soon after Chertoff’s decision. “What about the precedent being set? What does this say about executive management and leadership in the Agency?”

“Exactly,” replied Brown, then-under secretary for preparedness and response…

I don’t think those were rhetorical questions, Mike. Unless your true genius lies in being mystically laconic. You know, signing off e-mails with sayings like, “You must learn to master your fear or else fear will become your master.”

Though it’s probably the old rule about making a copy of a copy — it always comes out with greater dither and less resolution — that governs any attempt to make a crony of a crony:

“Let them play their raindeer [sic] games as long as they are not turning around and tasking us with their stupid questions. None of them have [sic] a clue about emergency management,” [Brooks] Altshuler [Brown’s deputy chief of staff] told Brown and Brown’s chief of staff, Patrick Rhode.

Freudian slip on that “raindeer,” huh? —MICHAEL WEISS

Messages Depict Disarray in Federal Katrina Response [WaPo]

READ MORE: fema, hurricane katrina relief, hurricane katrina relief, michael brown, new orleans, washington post

It’s What’s for Dinner — But Not Here, Please

Mad cow disease was the reason meat and poultry donated by the UK to help Katrina victims never wound up in American bellies. Instead, the food has idled, at a cost of $16,000 per month, in an Arkansas warehouse.

But ours is a government that can never let someone else’s good deed go without using it to punish a third party. The Washington Post:

State Department officials have considered sending the food to Guatemala, which was devastated by mudslides. But the impoverished country does not have vehicles to transport the enormous pallets. For cultural reasons, the meals would be inappropriate for Pakistani earthquake victims.

“Everyone wants a happy ending,” said a senior State Department official who requested anonymity, given the already bruised feelings in Britain. “No one wants them to go to waste. Everyone wants them to be put to good use.”

Hey, where do we keep the smallpox-infected blankets these days? Cold in Kyrgystan this time of year.

Katrina Food Aid Blocked by U.S. Rules [WaPo]

READ MORE: fema, hurricane katrina relief, new orleans, screaming chasm of cultural insensitivity

Suddenly Big Kanye Fans

Did you ever think Mike Meyers could be at a loss for words? During NBC’s benefit concert tonight, Meyers and ego-riffic Kanye West “rapped” in the emotive sense about Katrina, but then suddenly Kanye got all… racial and shit, talking about how he hates how his people are portrayed and what not. Then he admitted that he went shopping before donating, but that “my business manager is looking into” how much he can give. Then things got weird: “George Bush doesn’t care about black people,” he said. People are upset about this, but, by our lights, West could have put it more strongly and still been okay for primetime. Anyway… First, we love that Kanye apologized for going shopping before donating. We’re returning our Target placemats tomorrow, Kanye! Second, the look on Mike Meyers’s face… Clearly, Canadians have more respect for Bush than previously thought. Oh, behave, indeed.

Breaking News: Kanye West: George Bush doesn’t care about black people” [Yeah, right… “Breaking”…. Anyway: C&L]

UPDATE: MSNBC liveblogged and put the video as well. [MSNBC]
UPDATE: Ifilm has it, too, as well as the “news” that West’s remark’s were edited for the P.S.T. broadcasts. [iFilm]

READ MORE: george w. bush, hurricane katrina relief, kanye west, katrina, mike meyers, nbc, protests, top