Hillarywatch: Republicans Criminalize Jesus!

God do we love this woman. Let’s just skip the whole “election” thing and make her president right now. Here is Hillary’s latest pronouncement:

Surrounded by a multicultural coalition of New York immigration advocates, Clinton blasted the House bill [on immigration] as “mean-spirited” and said it flew in the face of Republicans’ stated support for faith and values.

“It is certainly not in keeping with my understanding of the Scriptures,” Clinton said, “because this bill would literally criminalize the Good Samaritan and probably even Jesus himself.”

Passing through Samaria without a visa — that’s a big no-no!

Clinton Vows to Block Bill Criminalizing Illegal Immigrants [AP]

READ MORE: Republicans, bible, hillary clinton, hillary rodham clinton, inappropriate biblical references, jesus, pandering, pandering to someone else’s base, top

Katherine Harris To Sell Vast Push-Up Bra Collection to Fund Senate Bid

And they are quite considerable, as we all know.

Last week, Rep. Katherine Harris said she would fund her Senate campaign with $10 million of her personal fortune. Last night, on Nightline, she went one step further, declaring her intention to sell all of her personal possessions to fund her Senate race: “My husband has real estate, but I will not own anything.” (Presumably she’s willing to sell her pink spandex bodysuits, which could probably fetch a tidy sum on eBay — especially if they haven’t been laundered.)

Harris also told Nightline’s John Donovan: “I am willing to take this widow’s mite, this pearl of great price, and put everything on the line. No matter how much you have, are you willing to take what you have and sell it all for a great price?”

Our Floridian tipster observes:

“A ‘widow’s mite’ is the small amount of money that a widow put in the alms tray, which Jesus said was worth more than a great amount given by a rich man. Ten million isn’t a widow’s mite by any stretch, especially considering that Kate’s husband is worth twice that and she won’t be suffering in any conceiveable way. The ‘pearl of great price’ phrase is put to even worse use — it has nothing to do whatsoever with wealth or money but refers to the kingdom of heaven.

So it is worth noting that not only is she an idiot but also that she is attempting to pander to the religious right. Scary.”

Earlier: BEST NEWS EVER
Here is a Picture of Katherine Harris Wearing Pink Spandex and Riding a Horse. You May Thank Us At Your Leisure.

READ MORE: 2006, bible, breasts, campaigns, elections, inappropriate biblical references, katherine harris, pandering, pandering to the base, senate

Senator Brownback Engages in Fruit-ful Dialogue

Last week, controversy erupted after Sen. Sam Brownback (R-Kan.), in an interview with Jeff Sharlet of Rolling Stone, made the following remarks:

“You look at the social impact of the countries that have engaged in homosexual marriage.” He shakes his head in sorrow, thinking of Sweden, which Christian conservatives believe has been made by “social engineering” into an outer ring of hell. “You’ll know ‘em by their fruits,” Brownback says. He pauses, and an awkward silence fills the room. He was citing scripture — Matthew 7:16 — but he just called gay Swedes “fruits.”

The Human Rights Campaign promptly fired off a letter to Senator Brownback, requesting an explanation and apology. Today the Senator issued the following clarification:

“When quoting Matthew 7:16, ‘Ye shall know them by their fruits,’ I was in no way referring to sexual orientation. While this biblical passage was pertinent to our overall conversation about faith and deeds, it apparently led the writer to believe I was making a joke; I was not and would never do so with such a personal and sensitive issue.”

In other words: Sometimes a banana is just a banana.

God’s Senator [Rolling Stone]

Gospel According to Brownback [Washington Post]

Earlier: Gossip Roundup: Brownback Talks Fruit

READ MORE: bible, fruit, gay, human rights campaign, inappropriate biblical references, rolling stone, sam brownback, sweden