Category: jeanine pirro

The Week In Wonkette

• President Bush sends out holiday greetings, reveals deeply-felt prejudices.

• Future Holidays of America announced: Stickmas comes every July, Abramoffukkah could come a LOT sooner.

• The Pentagon may or may not feel threatened by gay kiss-ins (Kisses-in? Is it like Attornies General?). We prefer to think that they ARE worried about them, because it makes things a lot more hilarious.

• Jeanine Pirro sets her sights a little lower; probably needs to set them lower still.

• Tom Delay spends a small fortune to bring GOP's message into the Republican-hostile environments of the filthy rich.

• Maureen Dowd: translated, tabularly.

• Darfur, Mr. President?

• Governor Bill Richardson's Presidential aspirations: doomed by his Uncle Bad Touch tendencies?— DCEIVER

READ MORE: Pentagon , abramoffukkah , bill richardson , gay , george bush , jeanine pirro , kanye west , maureen dowd , stickmas , tom delay , war on christmas , wonkette

Daily Briefing: Scott McClellan Saves Animals

• Senate votes to extend the Patriot Act for six months. [WP, NYT]
• Senate approves $40b in budget cuts with Cheney casting tie-breaking vote; two Republicans and 42 Democrats block plan for drilling in ANWR with filibuster. Sen. John Kerry: "I'm confident we will see another debate on ANWR." [WP, WP, WP, WP, NYT, LAT, USAT]
• FISA judges request briefing on eavesdropping program. [WP]
• Jack Abramoff inches closer to a plea deal. [NYT, LAT]
• Bush reaches out to black critics, suggesting "that the White House has not abandoned its political goal of trying to draw black voters from Democratic ranks"; Donna Brazile speaks highly of the president's efforts. [NYT]
• Eavesdropping program is unlikely to be challenged in court because of its secrecy. [USAT]

• Department of Homeland Security was a mess from its inception. [WP]
• Scott McClellan has lost hair from the stress, some colleagues say; "When briefings get tense, McClellan's voice can become robotic, as if he's a hostage reading a statement. His body language can betray unease: He starts blinking rapidly and he clenches his shoulders as an interrogator unfurls a question." [WP]
• Congress has not found a way to ween off foreign oil. [WP]
• National Security Agency's image has been "muddied considerably" by eavesdropping program. [NYT]
• Jeanine Pirro drops bid to oust Sen. Hillary Clinton; will run for attorney general of New York instead. [WP, NYT, LAT]

READ MORE: Democrats , Republicans , White House , anwr , congress , dhs , dick cheney , donna brazile , fisa , george w. bush , hillary clinton , jack abramoff , jeanine pirro , john f. kerry , nsa , patriot act , scott mcclellan , senate

New York GOP Announces a Pending Pirrouette

Despite the fact that working in the United States Senate offers a person like Jeanine Pirro to do what she does best, namely, staring stupidly into space for extended periods of time, Republican Party officials are saying today that she will drop her bid to unseat New York Senator Hillary Clinton. A replacement candidate has not yet been named.

For her part, Clinton remains committed to "running as fast and hard as [she] can" for re-election. Of course, many snipers of barrel-bound fish imagine that at some point, Clinton becomes a factor in the 2008 Presidential election. That prospect has only been enhanced by the authority President Bush conferred on the office allowing him to wiretap the phones of American citizens. No more crying yourself to sleep with a glass of warm milk and a stack of FBI files, eh, Hill? — DCEIVER

Officials: Sen. Clinton's GOP challenger to quit race [CNN]

READ MORE: domestic espionage scandal , hillary clinton , jeanine pirro , top

Gossip Roundup: 'Anti-Bush Behavior'

• Reliable Source: Scooter Libby met with lawyers at a cafe near Union Station, openly discussed the leak case, drank diet Dr Pepper, and purchased cookies. . . Bushes have lunch with Rep. John Dingell to celebrate his 50 years in Congress. [WP]
• Inside the Beltway: Bono changed Sen. Jesse Helms' views on AIDS. . . Terry McAuliffe's book is titled "Bring it On!" [WT]
• Page Six: Maureen Dowd: "If there had been no Monica Lewinsky, there would have been no Sen. [Hillary] Clinton. She had to run as a victim because she was seen as so controlling". . . Bill McCuddy of Fox News: "One of our makeup artists got Kofi Annan ready for a TV appearance at the U.N. the other day. Kind of embarrassing, when she told him the makeup was oil-based, out of habit he gave her food.". . . Karl Rove, dining at 21 with Ken Mehlman, devours beef tenderloin. . . Hillary Clinton's deputy state director, Tyson Pratcher, will run for Harold Ford's congressional seat [NYP, NYP]
• Cindy Adams: Jeanine Pirro expected to run for attorney general instead of the senate. [NYP]
• The Scoop: Viggo Mortensen: "I’m not anti-Bush, I’m anti-Bush behavior. In other words, I’m against cheating, greed, cruelty, racism, imperialism, religious fundamentalism, treason, and the seemingly limitless capacity for hypocrisy shown by Bush and his administration." [MSNBC]

READ MORE: Personalities , bill mccuddy , bono , george w. bush , harold ford , hillary clinton , jeanine pirro , jesse helms , john dingell , karl rove , ken mehlman , maureen dowd , monica lewinsky , scooter libby , terry mcauliffe , tyson pratcher , viggo mortensen

Gossip Roundup: Laura's Pottery Barn Rule is 5 Min

• Reliable Source: Laura Bush makes quick trip to Georgetown Pottery Barn. . . Oprah spotted at D.C. L.A. D.C. gym. [uhm...yeah.] [stupid gym name.]. . Readers try to decipher Richard Clarke's fictional characters. [WP]
• Cindy Adams: Barbara Streisand reportedly turned down Kennedy Center Honor in anti-Bush move. . . Jeanine Pirro thought to leave Senate race on December 12th. [NYP]
• Rush & Molloy: Jeb Bush is "flattered" by Fidel Castro's fat joke. [NYDN]
• Lloyd Grove's Lowdown: Howard Stern on Iraq: "We give Saddam Hussein a nice shave, hand him back his old uniform, and put him back in office. . . This guy was unbelievable." [NYDN]

READ MORE: Oprah Winfrey , Personalities , Personalities , barbara streisand , fidel castro , george w. bush , howard stern , jeanine pirro , jeb bush , laura bush , richard clarke , saddam hussein

Gossip Roundup: Miller's Screams

• Reliable Source: "Blond beauty queen-businesswoman" Marsha Ralls and D.C. Council member Jack Evans say they are just close friends, despite rumors of something more. . . Dennis Kucinich lunches with Sean Penn. . . Bono lunches with Nancy Pelosi and other top Democrats. [WP]
• Inside Politics: Media Research Center study finds network news was "overwhelmingly negative in their portrayal of the Iraq war." [WT]
• Rush & Molloy: Judith Miller reportedly screamed at Bill Keller to soften the Times' Sunday critique of her work. . . Sandy Berger, Ron Klain join ABC's "Commander in Chief" as advisors. [NYDN]
• Page Six: Reporters in Albany joke that the Pirro campaign is "really a pilot for a Fox sitcom." [NYP]

READ MORE: 2006 , Personalities , bill keller , bono , dennis kucinich , jack evans , jeanine pirro , judith miller , leak investigation , marsha ralls , nancy pelosi , network news , ron klain , sandy berger , sean penn , the new york times

Gossip Roundup: I Wish I Were On Vacation

The Daily Briefing is on vacation.

• Names and Faces: Rescued Iraq POW Jessica Lynch starts at West Virginia University, "doesn't want any special attention". . . . Hillary Clinton and Jeanine Pirro both have husbands whose misdeeds could overshadow their campaigns, but "The difference between Jeanine Pirro and Hillary Clinton is Jeanine Pirro's husband served time and Hillary's didn't." [WP]
• Lloyd Grove's Lowdown: Walter Kirn and Hil ghoster Maryanne Vollers in tiff over Kirn's post on AndrewSullivan.com describing Voller as having "discovered that there was no Hillary, really, just a creature concocted by her people" . . . . Guiliani pops curb, loses headlight cover. [NYDN]
• Page Six: Michael Moore at lifestyle re-education camp, a.k.a. "fat farm for the rich." [NYP]
• Cindy Adams: Judy Miller's "preference for prison work was the laundry. She was told no, she's not strong enough;" after she dies, Adams plans to ask Ben Franklin "is this what our Founding Fathers had in mind?" . . . . Robert F. Kennedy Jr. spoke and raised $460,000 at a food allergy event. [NYP]

READ MORE: andrew sullivan , ben franklin , hillary clinton , jeanine pirro , jessica lynch , judith miller , maryanne vollers , michael moore , robert f. kennedy, jr. , rudy guiliani , walter kirn

Gossip Roundup: A F-ing Big Story

Daily Briefing is on vacation. Relax, it's good for you.

• Salt historian knows very old jokes; told Bush is reading his tome, "Salt: A World History," Mark Kurlansky told Newsday "My first reaction was, 'Oh, he reads books?'". . . . Washingtonians not funny . . . . Universal to make film of 9/11's "Flight 93." [WP]
• Hollywood crowd applauds Reagan's on-screen death, cheers his being "threatened at gunpoint and pushed out of a speeding car," boos the words "Also Starring Ronald Reagan." [WT]
• Michael Wolff tells offends delicate sensibilities of Michael's crowd, says CIA leak investigation a "fucking big deal;" WP's Cohen points out that VF wankathons not the same as reporting: "You guess, and then you write!" [NYDN]
• More Pirro bloopers: Campaign website misspells names, forgets to note some pictured are dead. "It's another example of the screw-ups that have now come to define the Pirro campaign," a disgusted GOP activist says . . . . Producers of "The Great American Trailer Park Musical" dedicating production to Bill Clinton. . . . Overflow crowd for funeral of slain war journalist Steven Vincent. [Page Six, Page Six, Page Six]
• Robert Redford producing sequel to "The Candidate". . . . BREAKING: Dems not enthused about second Kerry nom. [Cindy Adams]
• Possible tell-all by Peter Jennings's ex dividing chattering class. [Liz Smith]

READ MORE: bill clinton , george w. bush , jeanine pirro , mark kurlansky , michael wolff , peter jennings , plame investigation , richard cohen , robert redford , ronald reagan , vanity fair

Gossip Roundup: Pirro's Panties

• Bush to ride with Lance Armstrong in Crawford, though without traditional cycling attire: "There are certain things that age brings with it, and not wearing the form-fitting Lycra shorts is one of them, if you know what I mean." Somehow we think things would have been different under Kerry. . . . McCain takes son and pal out to congratulatory dinner Arlington. . . 41 percent in TIME survey have no idea what to think of "Influential Hispanic" Alberto Gonzales. [WP]
• At George Soros' 75th birthday party in Southampton, he "pitched giant air-conditioned tents" (heh) and invited Indian and African performers to entertain guests, moguls found planes grounded, however, and had to take car services to city. [Rush and Malloy]
• That's one way to distinguish yourself from Hillary: Jeanine Pirro likes silky underthings and margaritas. [Page Six]
• Novelistic take on the War on Terror has Bush asking, "Can we somehow throw a kind of electric blanket around New York?" [Cindy Adams]
• Walter Isaacson keeps Washington's eyes " turned west looking to Aspen" with thrill-a-minute dialogues starring the likes of Joe Lieberman. [Liz Smith]

READ MORE: alberto gonzales , crawford , george soros , george w. bush , gossip roundup , jeanine pirro , joe lieberman , john kerry , john mccain , lance armstrong , walter isaacson

Wonkette Instant Opinions You Should Have Now: Walken, Women, Wolfeboro

Need an opinion? We have several. Take one, please.

Christopher Walken running for president: Finally, an inaugural ball first dance worth watching. Also: More cow bell!

Jeanine Pirro's mob connections: When was she considered a challenger again?

WH hires female chef: We don't see this as a triumph for women so much as a triumph for reporters who have nothing to write about.

Bush takes reporters mountain biking, institutes "may not pass the President" rule: It's how he gets through cabinet meetings, too.

"Wolfeboro just might be the next Summer White House": See, here's the horse, then comes the cart.

C-SPAN does podcasts: Our workouts will never be the same.

Delta's DC-NYC-Boston shuttle institutes first class seating: So much for ever talking to Walter Isaacson again.

READ MORE: White House , c-span , christopher walken , george w. bush , instant opinions , jeanine pirro

Pirro's Pause

It was amateur night at the Astoria yesterday, what with Jeanine Pirro fumbling at the mic for 32 seconds before finally calling for an aide to give her "page 10." Clearly, like others before her, Pirro has fallen victim to the Clinton Podium Curse. Bill takes pills for that.

UPDATE: Wow, that was fast: NY Dems put out an ad with a very short script. [C&L]

Westchester DA Jeanine Pirro Officially Announces Run For Senate [NY1]

READ MORE: gaffes , hillary clinton , jeanine pirro , senate

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