Purple Reign

Names and Faces reports on a cheesy Web promotional gimmick for Wedding Crashers that’s run afoul of the law—or at least a law in progress. The site’s “Crasher Kit” includes a print-your-own-Purple Heart feature, so that you can print out a phony medal and use it, like the Owen Wilson character in the film, to bag unsuspecting maids of honor. But Hershel Gobel, of the Military Order of the Purple Heart, got the film’s producers at New Line Cinema to take the feature down. Gobel is also campaigning for the ratification of Rep. John T. Salazar’s (D-Colo.) “Stolen Valor Act” making it illegal to display phony military awards. (In addition to buying, selling, making and wearing them, which is already illegal.) That all sounds very worthy and good, but we’re hoping we can build on this encouraging precedent. Let’s round up the douchetards at last year’s GOP convention who distributed the bandaids mocking John Kerry’s war wounds (surely tasteless medal parody falls under the law’s provisions). And while we’re at it, can we please get something done about those irksome Steve Zissou Adidases? —HOLLY MARTINS

Cheating Hearts [Washington Post; third item]

READ MORE: congress, military, pop culture, style section