Tonight we have the 750th and 751st primaries in the 2008 Democratic nominating contest, in Kentucky and Oregon. This means we'll probably be watching MSNBC for a good portion of the night because (a) Chris Matthews is such a
stitch and (b) Chuck Todd, he so dreamy! Hillary will likely be declared the winner of Kentucky as soon as polls close, we'll get an earful of mindless chatter about Obama's continuing problems courting Bitters, Chuck Todd and Rachel Maddow and Eugene Robinson will note that Obama's likely victory in Oregon will neutralize Hillary's Kentucky delegate pickups, Tim Russert will declare that we have just reached some historical turning point in Math, Matthews will pull down his pants, Nora O'Donnell will be shown from the front only because she is pregnant, Dan Abrams will appear at 1 a.m. with no tie on, the end. Most importantly, Pat Buchanan will spasm uncontrollably all night long — he's been doing it
more and more recently — over Obama's fatal flaws. Why, exactly, has Pat been even more of a nut recently on the teevee? It's simple enough: Barack Obama is threatening to undo his life's work.
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Wonkette
Doctors have determined that Ted Kennedy, who was hospitalized after a seizure over the weekend, has a malignant brain tumor. They're going to do some more tests to determine a course of action, but average survival appears to be anywhere between less than a year to five years. Too sad. Get well soon, Teddy! We will honor you by linking to your massive, awe-inspiring legislative accomplishments section on Wikipedia, as you watch the Red Sox in the hospital. [AP/MSNBC]
OH GOD: "Republican John McCain's campaign has begun holding regular conference calls with leftwing bloggers and blogs that focus on single issues such as healthcare and the environment." Hey, do we get a call, or have all the references to Cindy McCain being a pill-popper and John McCain being the Antichrist kind of nixed that? Give us a call, WALLLLLLNUTS! [
