Wonkette - prepostrous claims

Category: prepostrous claims

NOV

2005

Also: Did Not Greenlight Gigli

It appears that the Department of Homeland Security is going a bit crazy with this whole giving-of-thanks thing. From Al Kamen's "In the Loop" column in today's WaPo:

DHS Today will highlight FY05 Accomplishments in this column over the next several weeks. This week's focus is on the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA). The top FY05 FEMA accomplishments included:
Hurricane Katrina: The response to Hurricane Katrina was FEMA's largest response in its history . . .

Other FEMA accomplishments to be celebrated in coming weeks:

-FEMA managed not to impale any puppies on crossbows, the largest non-puppy-slaying mobilization in the agency's history.

-FEMA played no role whatsoever in ghostwriting Nicole Richie's novel, the most impressive act of literary nonparticipation it has ever performed.

-FEMA, so far as it is known, has no plans to bomb Al Jazeera.

-FEMA: Not Bob Woodward's source for the Plame leak.

-Uhm, we mentioned that whole puppy thing, right?

Alas, one disaster FEMA can still claim indirect credit for is also reported in Kamen's column. Disgraced shirt-model-cum-horse-inspector Michael Brown has hied over to Joe Allbaugh's lobbying office. Allbaugh is Brown's predecessor at the head of the agency and by merest coincidence a former college crony of the smug pleated fuckwad. -- HOLLY MARTINS

In the Loop [WaPo; second and third items]

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