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Searching for the final nail in the coffin of Rick Santorum’s political career, there appears to be a solid contender in a CNN interview Piers Morgan conducted with the Republican candidate ahead of the South Carolina primary. The liberal network OBVS wanted to get at Santorum’s extremely conservative views, but the response Santorum gave on [...]
Hey, COOL! Some crazy wingnut lady is sharing her abortion porn-based decorating tips with America’s college kids! Rep. Vicky Hartzler of Missouri recommends covering the dorm bulletin board with high-quality prints of aborted fetuses (which, in the video sounds more like “aborted feces”, no?). If graphic late-term abortion footage won’t exactly fly with your feminazi [...]
The rather thorough thumping Mitt Romney got in the South Carolina primary Saturday finally convinced our ever petulant office seeker to release his latest tax returns for the consumption of a barbarous public. After getting his spot blown up by Newt Gingrich, of all insufferable monsters, Mitt appears to have realized that stammering with indignation [...]
What are the Christian wingnut conservative Republicans doing about 2012 now? Uniting behind Santorum, of course! Because when you’re stuck with a slate of candidates including a liberal billionaire foreigner who loves the wrong Jesus and a repulsive kidney-shaped punching bag who is so venal and amoral he makes Bill Clinton look like a family [...]
Sinking political tabloid Newsweek has got a HOT SCOOP on a story that, as usual, broke several years ago, which in this case stars the twentysomething sexytimes of one Karen Santorum née Garver before she met hubby Rick Santorum, all the way back when she was just a wily young nursing student who appeared at [...]
NEW YORK—Well there was an awards ceremony last night! And we spotted former Connecticut senator and Motion Picture Association of America chairman Chris Dodd in the audience, who was looking in especially high spirits—at least considering that his beloved SOPA is dead, or sort of dead, or temporarily “put on a shelf” or whatever it [...]
Uh-oh, that thing that no one thought would happen but secretly knew was going to happen has finally HAPPENED, folks: Mitt Romney is leading in a new poll out of Iowa. Great. Iowa has lost its sense of humor just in time for the caucuses. “Political wisdom,” which is an oxymoron, has it that Romney [...]
We hear this is the “last” GOP debate of the year, but then again we also once believed Santa Claus was for real, so… who knows? What is for FACT is that we will be crawling into a closet to sob when this thing is over, because that is how we usually “come down” from [...]
What a charming holiday story: the nutsack owners of a Christian bookstore mega-chain are discontinuing sales of a particular Bible that donates one dollar of every sale to a breast cancer research charity, because of… what this time, charity being anti-free market or something? (Oops, we shouldn’t give them more ideas.) NO, it’s because the [...]
Serial-divorcing creep Newt Gingrich just can’t stop taking advantage of the women who work for him — it’s the only way a toad like Newt can get any tail! — but this is apparently a problem with the conservative Family Values crowd. What to do? Well, this time, during his third marriage and after two [...]
Because Apple designs computing devices that aren’t as hideous and abysmal as other computing devices on the market, people who possess aesthetic values (liberals) have long loved the company and its products. But Apple is still a multinational corporation, one of the world’s biggest, and it is certainly evil in terms of its slave-labor work [...]
Nobody is sadder about amoral serial-divorcer Newt Gingrich’s momentary rise in the GOP primary polls than invisible wingnut Rick Santorum. Why do the Iowans sort of half-pretend to be interested in Gingrich for a few weeks when a real Catholic anti-abortion zealot has been running for the nomination all along? For Christ sakes, Gingrich only [...]
Herman Cain, currently in an eight-way tie for senior superlative Least Likely to Be President, would like to reiterate that he really, really does not care for these bothersome Muslims. He doesn’t want them in his cabinet, he doesn’t want them in his judiciary, and he definitely doesn’t want them trying to cure him of [...]
Sad news for American blastocysts, guys. Accidental zygotes are still not as sacred as you and I, now that the normals in Mississippi — whose existence was considered apocryphal until Tuesday’s election — have decided they’ve had just about enough of the pushy nuts behind up-and-coming fetus cargo cult Personhood USA. Final tally: a 59%-41% [...]
