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Democrats are not known for their hardball, but when it comes to, uh, Internet domain names, they apparently do not fuck around -– just ask disgraced former lobbyist and Zionist pizza shill Jack Abramoff, who is asking nicely, pretty please, for the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee to relinquish its death grip as the current owners [...]
Hey kids, do you want to grow up to be a journalist? Here’s what journalists do: Spread official lies in the “mainstream media,” and also ignore whatever is actually happening around them, and always show the proper decorum when dealing with the Rich & Powerful. What else? Oh yeah, a good journalist also spends his [...]
Were you lucky enough to have a real, live astronaut visit your elementary school back when public schools still existed? Bet the kids were so so super excited!!! We definitely were, because, of course, even a low- to middle-tier astronaut is several orders of magnitude cooler than anyone who hasn’t been weightless in Outer Space. [...]
Remember when people were freaking out over the Patriot Act and Homeland Security and all this other conveniently ready-to-go post-9/11 police state stuff, because it would obviously be just a matter of time before the whole apparatus was turned against non-Muslim Americans when they started getting complain-y about the social injustice and economic injustice and [...]
Irredeemable doofus James O’Keefe still thinks of himself as some kind of right-wing Sacha Baron Cohen-type genius prankster, but he’s *struggling* a little bit these days with subject matter. His latest SCOOP involves pouting about a dismissive email that a Columbia Journalism professor sent him with some swears in it, leading O’Keefe to try to [...]
We usually click “delete all” on the marketing press releases that flood the Wonkette Tips Line each day, but this Veterans Day Charity Auction thing to help veterans mauled and disfigured by Donald Rumsfeld’s murderous oil-company wars sounded kind of special: “Former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld is auctioning the opportunity for a winning bidder [...]
OH JOY let us all gather round our dusty ‘puter screens with our booze supplies, since the Homeland Security Department decided to half-assedly nuke America’s television sets (not that we even own one these days), so that we may together witness the Xmas miracle of a bunch of screaming devil millionaire slobs argue over how [...]
The generally obese, illiterate citizens of Mississippi are for some reason voting today on an insane initiative widely billed as a litmus test on “how fucking backasswards can Mississippi possibly be?” that will determine whether the state adds a constitutional amendment defining fertilized egg blobs to be “persons.” The rest of you humans, fuck off! [...]
Dull little rich boy Mitt Romney can’t get Republicans to love him, because he loves the Wrong Jesus and also was the creator of Obamacare in Taxachusetts. The news media, meanwhile, will only write about where Herman Cain would’ve liked to stick his dong, and the money he paid to silence the ladies about his [...]
It says a lot about the Internet that the first thing we saw about the November 5 Anti-Bank Action Day was a snide remark. Something along the lines of “Good job dumb hippies, banks are closed on Saturday.” First of all, not true at all! Bank headquarters are closed on Saturday, but most bank branches [...]
Here is the cell phone video of some vicious asshole driving self-importantly in his Mercedes through the protester crowd in Oakland last night until one male protester stops in front of the car and then pounds on the hood a few times. HEY HEY. Do not molest the rich man’s expensive penis car!!! So, insanely, [...]
So what sorts of hobbies are America’s agitated olds taking up these days when they are not busy surfing the apocalypse survival kit and Bible sale ads on Newsmax? Plotting mass murder, it turns out. Yeesh. When did soothing naps go out of style? The FBI arrested four seniors in Georgia Tuesday for allegedly using [...]
Texas Governor Rick Perry had not been drinking in public or smoking marijuana in front of people or gobbling “back pills,” according to the leader of the conservative group that hosted Perry’s rambling, drunken speech over the weekend. “I can tell you unequivocally he wasn’t drinking at the event and he hadn’t been drinking prior [...]
As this photo from our #OWS correspondent KenLayIsAlive makes clear, the guys with the Guy Fawkes masks are well represented at Occupy Wall Street and many other Protest Occupations around the country. The cultural trajectory of this mask is sometimes hard to follow, but here’s our attempt to explain it, and also explain why it [...]
The serious proposals for fixing “the housing crisis” in this country have so far amounted to a) Alan Greenspan suggesting the federal government burn down the millions of vacant foreclosures across America and b) an actual government program that allowed Goldman Sachs to buy foreclosures in bulk for pennies on the dollar and then rent [...]
