andrew breitbart
Andrew Breitbart Longing To Shoot The Next Person Who Insults Him
Screw Barack Obama and the pussy liberals with their “class warfare.” Conservative anger bear furry and professional Twitter troll Andrew Breitbart wants “warfare warfare,” because he is just murderously sick and tired of being called a homo by everyone, on Twitter. HOW DARE THESE PEOPLE. Andrew Breitbart is the world’s biggest victim, Andrew Breitbart in [...]
Hooray, Congressman Anthony Weiner isn’t going to do the usual liberal/Democrat thing of just sitting there and taking whatever criminal bullshit the fringe-right dishes up, and he has hired an attorney to pursue the hacker who hacked into Weiner’s Twitter/yfrog account and posted a pornographic image. Have fun in Gitmo with the Sharia law, Breitbart! [...]
While we innocently pre-pre-gamed for Memorial Day barbecues, furious conspiracy nut Andrew Breitbart was saving the world, AGAIN. “Someone” broke into Rep. Anthony Weiner’s Twitter account and posted a picture of a wiener (get it??) and then Breitbart’s AARP version of 4chan “grabbed hold” of the dong picture before it was deleted, to prove once [...]
Hmm: Andrew Breitbart Gets Really Defensive About His Alcohol Use
by Jack Stuef
Score one for random chance: for the first time in the long history of C-SPAN, something interesting actually happened on air! Democracy’s best friend Andrew Breitbart (he’s also best friends with truth and journalistic ethics; pick one, Andy!) was on to talk about his book when he was asked to describe his “current relationship with [...]
America’s surly unemployed white mouse-clickers need a little direction here. What website needs to be boycotted next? It appears it is Andrew Sullivan’s “Daily Dish,” because he has committed the Crime of repeatedly writing in a Disrespectful Way about Saint Sarah Palin and her baby. Do these people realize Andrew’s site isn’t just a couple [...]
Democracy’s Troll Breitbart Says a Lot of Dumb Stuff To Victoria Jackson
by Jack Stuef
Human poop-leech Andrew Breitbart is probably best known for choosing carefully edited videos of black women who have done nothing wrong, but are actually pretty remarkable citizens, and trying to ruin their lives and the reputation of what is perhaps the most important civil rights group in American history. Unfortunately, the first time he did [...]
Andrew Breitbart Says Glenn Beck Helped Him With Shirley Sherrod Vid
by Jack Stuef
When Andrew Breitbart got his hands on a video of a speech on race by a woman named Shirley Sherrod, he knew he could edit it so as to make the NAACP seem racist. It was pretty obvious what was going on, but after wimpy fertilizer king Tom Vilsack got scared and fired her, and [...]
James O’Keefe Dances and Sings In Flamboyant YouTube Musical
For reasons which are sort of obvious, James O’Keefe donned his favorite Village People construction worker costume — the one with the assless chaps — and then sang a song about Mary Landrieu. What? “Dancing” and auto-tuned vomit starts at around 3:00. (Also, check out this video’s YouTube channel. We assume the “Favorite Videos” are [...]
Sarah Palin Receives Massive Disrespect From Wisconsin Bolshies
Mama Sasquatch made a rare appearance in Soviet-occupied Wisconsin, where she won over the audience (mostly greedy schoolteachers and truck drivers) with lines like “Hey, folks! [Walker's] trying to save your jobs and your pensions! Your governor did the right thing and you won! And people still have their jobs!” She had to yell these [...]
Breitbart Will Save Scott Walker From Ordinary Working Americans!
WHO WILL RESCUE SCOTT WALKER FROM ALL THOSE PEOPLE STANDING AROUND PEACEFULLY? asks Ban Ki-moon, in a Facebook status update that doesn’t actually exist. (Haha, we imagine that Scott Walker is probably just relaxing quietly at home, maybe even masturbating to his favorite Brooks Brothers catalog, the one with the dolphin tessellation neckties and fancy [...]
Look what’s buried at the bottom of the New York Times CPAC straw-poll story: Andrew Breitbart, the owner of several conservative Web sites, was served at the conference on Saturday with a lawsuit filed by Shirley Sherrod, the former Agriculture Department employee who lost her job last year over a video that Mr. Brietbart posted [...]
Sexytime Reunion With Andrew Breitbart, and Other Sad CPAC Stories
Our secret boyfriend Andrew Breitbart was already blackout drunk and partially undressed when we found him stumbling around the bedbug infested lobby of the Washington Marriott. What other terrible things transpired at this terrible conference?
Michael Steele Shows Up To Gay Party, Discusses Having Sex With Sarah Palin
by Jack Stuef
GOProud/Andrew Breitbart’s “Big Party” last night was the happening CPAC place to be, because it had an open bar, and because the people there were capable of not shouting about abortion to random strangers every five seconds. Also, your Wonkette caught up with its dawg, Michael Steele, who has opinions about Sarah Palin’s sexy body, [...]
ABC Won’t Have Andrew Breitbart’s Expert Poop-Leech Analysis Tonight
by Jack Stuef
ABC News released an e-mail they sent to human poop-leech Andrew Breitbart this afternoon telling him he now cannot take part in their election coverage tonight even though America will miss his expertise in accusing minorities of racism. They definitely wanted Breitbart to participate in their online coverage, they say, but they were sick of [...]
Andrew Breitbart Still Suffers From Serious Boy-Touching Denial
We remember it like it was yesterday, but actually it was 9/12: Your part-time morning editor was walking dejectedly through a Tea Bagger field, and then Andrew Breitbart appeared from the mist in a gorgeous Victorian gown and drunkenly groped us for what seemed like “too long.” It was such a special, Charlotte Bronte moment. [...]
