bailout
Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson announced a major shift today in the Troubled Asset Release Program (TARP!) — or, as the kids call it, “n00bama bailout $ocialism” — and we do not necessarily know to what the shift is. We know from what Hanky is shifting away, though, and that is the plan to buy toxic [...]
AND EVERYONE’S HAPPY: “President George W. Bush signed the biggest government intervention in the financial markets since the Great Depression after U.S. House of Representatives lawmakers wary of growing signs of the nation’s economic distress voted Friday in favor of a $700 billion Wall Street rescue package. Mr. Bush welcomed the passage of a rescue [...]
Whoa what is going on here, the wacky bailout bill has somehow passed in the House of Representatives by two million votes, 263-171. Take that, uh, China!…?? Many House Republicans switched from “no” to “yes” because they thought they were voting on a measure legalizing gay sex with pages. Now the bill will be driven [...]
Hey, you half-million people seeking unemployment checks last month: Did you not hear that Congress and Hank Paulson are going to Save the Economy? And what about you Wall Street analysts finally admitting, today, that the United States is in a terrible recession? Did you forget that John McCain believes the fundamentals are strong?
God this just makes no sense. McCain says about the bailout he voted for just last night, “This bill is putting us on the brink of economic disaster.” Well that’s as good a reason as any to support it, no? Then he says he voted against Medicare and porks at other times in his life [...]
The House will probably approve this new bailout plan, which is exactly what was said last time. [New York Times] The Senate had a busy day yesterday, as it also voted to re-open nuclear trade with India. Looks like your President Bush is no longer without a single foreign policy success, hooray! [Washington Post] Apple [...]
The White House has been trying to rename the GREEDY WALL STREET MONEY GIFT a “rescue” plan today as a more palatable replacement for the common nomenclature, “bailout.” Now “bailout” is not a very marketable word, sure, so let’s test how “rescue” plays out: “The government wants to rescue Wall Street with billions of dollars [...]
LEDE OF THE DAY: “Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) and his top aides took credit for building a winning bailout coalition – hours before the vote failed and stocks tanked.” [Politico]
NUMBERS ARE FOR LOSERS: Oh well this is nice: after the Dow plummeted 600 points early this afternoon, it recovered most of those losses. And by that we mean CONTINUED TO PLUMMET HORRIBLY GAHHH. It’s down 770 777 points, which sounds eerily like a “record.” The S&P and Nasdaq are faring even worse, percentage-wise. Here’s [...]
Dearest Wonkette readers. Now would be an appropriate time to grab a drink and reassess the value of, you know, representative democracy as an effective form of government at all. If you’ve been watching CNN for the last couple of hours… well, we’re right there with you. Oh god CNN is now looking at Internet [...]
OH GOD, SUCH LOSERS: They just banged the gavel for the bailout vote, and some Republican (who voted against it) asked about a motion to reconsider. So is he just going to vote for it if they raise it a second time — which they probably will, in some form — so as to say [...]
Ahh, looks like that Bailout Compromise is going to pass in the House eas… ACK, it’s not going to pass. Well! The economy was fun while it lasted. You can watch exciting live footage of the vote at CNN.com. Now it’s 228 nay, 205 YAY. The Dow has dropped more than 600 points in the [...]
