chicago
Two brave Illinois GOP state legislators are so sick of Chicago’s gays and liberals and their gay liberal mayor and its gay $532 billion economy and its gay St. Patrick’s Day Parade that they have finally just proposed the obvious: wall the damn place off, and let everyone else in Illinois form their own state. [...]
Our FLOTUS had her fun last week, when she went for a casual walk through a Target store even though she wasn’t fooling anyone. Now she is back to her normal business, which means she is hanging out with her BFF Rahm Emanuel, shouting curse words at the fat children of Chicago’s food deserts. But [...]
Chicago teabagger organizer-goon king Steve Stevlic mysteriously went AWOL at his own TEACON lunatic festival that he put together this weekend after Gawker reported that he was arrested in 2010 for being a hooker-sex fiend who also, like all such “family values people,” compensated by screaming profusely at a Democrat sex cheater on Twitter. Neat [...]
The polite term that CNN uses for Rahm Emanuel’s latest outburst is “feisty,” which is the sort of word your grandmother uses to describe the family’s screamer alcoholic uncle who goes off about how his disability check isn’t even enough to cover the cost of a new toilet seat when you ask him about the [...]
Because we are a dumb political joke blog, we spent all day writing about Sarah Palin’s “Lou Sarah” account on Facebook and other shoddy, paltry bits of American Public Life instead of the actual political news of the day. What is wrong with us? Oh, right, we are trapped in a dipshit business of chasing [...]
Rahm Emanuel, the former chief of staff to President Barack Obama, won the Chicago mayoral election Tuesday, topping the 50% threshold to avoid a run-off vote, CNN projects. Bye fucker. [CNN]
WHAT ARE STATE LINES OTHER THAN AN ARBITRARY CONTRIVANCE OF AN IMPERFECT HUMANITY? Rahm Emanuel’s bid to become mayor of this city may proceed, the Illinois Supreme Court ruled on Thursday. Well, there you have it. Perhaps this is the last Rahm post we’ll ever have to do until he becomes a boring mayor and [...]
And so, even as printing of the city’s ballots was set to begin immediately at the Chicago Board of Elections (early voting is to start next Monday), all eyes were turning to the Illinois Supreme Court. The court – made up of four Democrats and three Republicans – may consider Mr. Emanuel’s request for an [...]
Though he is currently leading landslidingly in the polls, Rahm Emanuel is no longer eligible to run for mayor of Chicago, because an appellate court ruled 2-1 that he did not meet residency requirements because he did not, you know, reside there. This will be appealed to the Illinois Supreme Court, of course, which hopefully [...]
Supporters of Roland W. Burris, who is packing up his United States Senate office this week to come home to Chicago, have filed the necessary paperwork so that he may seek the city’s top job. [...] Mr. Burris, who was appointed to finish the senate term of Barack Obama, was approached this fall, his aides [...]
That parcel-terror plot apparently involved explosives being mailed to a couple of Chicago synagogues. You know, because Chicago synagogues are very much responsible for the Iraq and Afghanistan wars and whatever else (everything) now included in the War Upon the Terror. President Obama says he’s “very concerned” and will “keep using robot death drones to [...]
Some old people in the Chicago suburb of Wilmette went bonkers on each other because of political candidate signs on somebody’s lawn. While the brutal old-on-old violence occurred back on October 4, it is just now reaching the news media because, honestly, elderly people seem to always be going on about something and who has [...]
