Happy Halloween! Did you take advantage of the one day on which you can worship Satan and pass out razor blade candy, without feeling the least bit guilty? Well that’s very comforting, because possibly thousands of small children attended a White House Halloween veggie potluck, and it was probably the worst night of their young [...]
Well hello there, you dirty little hamsters! What did you do this week? Jack off to shirtless photos of Carl Paladino advisor and known titty enthusiast Roger Stone? Stretch your intellectual muscles by taking in a Christine O’Donnell television special? Or, haha, maybe you burned down a house, for Christ! Whatever you did, it was [...]
C-SPAN has a video up of Rep. Ted Poe (R-TX) on the House floor giving a speech about the evils of domestic violence. That would be a pretty normal thing for them to do! But his grandson is sitting behind him the whole time, falling asleep and thus undermining Poe’s details about how scary domestic [...]
The Teabaggers are in a bit of a conundrum. There are only X many white people that can be wooed with promises of Made in China flag-waving picnics, and every day America is becoming less “white” and more “immigrant.” So what’s Plan B? Sell fun Teabagger coloring books to all the white children! Even Hitler [...]
Isn’t it amazing how quickly Al-Qaeda has been able to infiltrate the Texas public education system and impose its radical Islam stuff on America’s impressionable young people? Yes, it is! Just flip through one of these so-called history books and you will soon realize that only one or two chapters are about never forgetting about [...]
Pope Benedict’s trip to England started on a sort of racist, not-helpful note. But the Big XVI has recovered, and he even told the Limey newspaper men that you know, isn’t it a pity the Church was able to suppress allegations of child abuse for so long? Pope Benedict XVI, beginning a controversial state visit [...]
The USDA should be dissolved, because it makes zero sense to have a separate government death panel just for Agriculture. [Matt Yglesias] The U.S. can only send a few helicopters to rescue flood victims in Pakistan. Maybe if Wikileaks didn’t start the War in Afghanistan we could have helped out more? [Think Progress] Many ignorant [...]
The AP obtained a PAC questionnaire filled out by Sharron Angle, and surprisingly, it reveals that she has some interesting beliefs! The questionnaire had 36 questions and boxes to mark “yes” or “no,” so thankfully it was easy for Sharron Angle to fill out. The PAC “Government Is Not God” has endorsed her campaign. Government [...]
Defense Secretary Robert Gates addressed this week’s Boy Scout Jamboree, the most important event in our nation’s history, because SOMEBODY couldn’t bother to come. The Wall Street Journal described Gate’s speech as “cranky” — just because he attacked the character of innocent young (non Boy Scout) Americans, who are “increasingly physically unfit.”
Len Britton is a Republican from Vermont running for U.S. Senate this election season — and if there’s one thing he loves, it’s sitting idly by on picnic tables while a random adult male throws diseased salmonella pork water on children who then drown in a lake. Britton approves of this evil stunt in the [...]
Put up a Bible verse and cue space music! Wonkette operative “Gene” writes us from his Congressional e-mail account (HEY THAT IS FOR TAXPAYERS NOT YOUR WONKETTE) that he’s “not quite sure this guy isn’t Eric Wareheim.” Well we aren’t either, and certainly that man’s show and submarine sandwiches seem to be a theme for [...]
Former Michigan Speaker of the House Republican Craig DeRoche was arrested Sunday morning after friends and family called police because DeRoche was drunk and carrying around a gun, the Detroit Free Press reports. This happened because DeRoche’s wife was out of town, and when that happens, you have a license to get drunk and ride [...]
Sarah Palin has inspired a generation of stay-at-home-mommies to strip their “mama bear” suits (their “fursonas,” if you will) and run for political office. [Matt Yglesias] Ayn Rand is so popular now, someone even made a straight-to-YouTube movie about her and who knows what’s next, maybe a Hulu minseries? [Hit & Run] Dear Young Person: [...]
Trust us, Washington Post, we know all too well the horror of sitting in front of your computer and realizing that you have infinite Internet space to fill and nothing to fill it with. In our case, it’s because yet another morning is wearing on and the entire Republican leadership refuses to be caught blowing [...]
So now Barack Obama thinks he can just lose the White House press corps whenever he feels like it, because he “needs his space” or “wants some uninterrupted family time” or whatever. This guy is not a patriotic real American, with his hatred of our nation’s most cherished traditions and his unseemly love for the [...]
