collapse
Despite the complete recovery of the American Economy — what, did you miss it? — a record 14% of households with mortgages are currently delinquent. That’s more than 7 million households. Another survey says 10% of all mortgages are in default, the highest percentage on record. Don’t worry, it gets worse.
The global economy appears to be in freefall, with Asian markets dropping more than 2% and the Euro dropping to four-year lows against everything. Meanwhile, the U.S. economy seems to be on the mend, finally, but also nobody really believes this, in their hearts, and unemployment is still officially at 9.9% — the real rate [...]
Those lousy Greeks/Europeans, how can they spend so much money propping up their failed economy and jobless cretins and mountains of bad debt? Don’t they have capitalist scruples or whatever? Oh yeah, and America’s government-run mortgage hander-outer, Fannie Mae, needs another $8.4 billion to get through next week maybe, things have been sort of tough, [...]
The Czech government collapsed, which means current prime minister — and current president of the European Union, whoops! — Mirek Topolanek is now powerless and will soon be jobless, but that doesn’t mean he can’t deliver an apocalyptically Slavic-ly gloomy sermon against the United States and its terrible bailout plan, which is just like the [...]
Thursday, early evening. She turns the key to her Dungeon of Medicines, an isolated pod floating atop the highest vistas of Park Avenue. It is constructed of the finest Metals and can only be reached by rickshaw. Even after all these years, the scent of myrrh lingers. A glass of scotch is poured and she [...]
Brooklyn fraud king Isaac Robert Toussie got the gift of Innocence from George W. Bush on Tuesday. But just a day later, on Christmas Eve, mean old Grinch W. Bush’s heart shrunk three times. Even thought Toussie’s dad sent the GOP a $28,500 “reminder” that his convicted felon son really needed a presidential pardon for [...]
Sometimes the stock market is more “faith based” than a mall-church full of unemployed white trash. The Dow did a triple-digit plunge this morning, because the world is actually ending, especially the “making money” part, but it suddenly did a 200-point turnaround on month-old data suggesting a whole 4,000 heavily marked-down new homes sold in [...]
HELP US, GEORGE W., YOU ARE OUR ONLY HOPE? Oh dear lord, George W. Bush will be rolled out in a moment to speak about the Depression, again. Liveblogging will occur. [Associated Press]
Hmm so yes, this is what it’s come to: our national financial crisis was predicted by a comic book movie about a villain with a lumpy white sliced-up face. This mashup of George Bush’s sad address from last night and Heath Ledger’s bravura performance as an insane person with drymouth is dreadfully offensive to the [...]
It’s time for an old-fashioned “fireside chat,” minus the fire, and minus the comforting voice of paternal buddy Franklin “FDR” Roosevelt. Instead, that one guy will be rolled out this evening, Bush Junior. He will awkwardly read from a teleprompter about the dire economic situation and how those lousy Dems better back Paulson’s $700 billion [...]
McCAIN’S KLEPTOCRACY: Freddie Mac insiders tell invisible pretend newspaper that McCain campaign manager Rick Davis was actually taking $15,000 a month from the ruined mortgage giant until last month. [New York Times]
Here’s some hilarious video from outside a McCain campaign stop in Ohio, where some older people chant “Keating Five,” which was the great group of corrupt senators (including John McCain) who caused the last collapse of American finance, in the late ’80s. This teevee reporter has no idea what they’re talking about, of course. [Blogger [...]
