• February 15, 2012

debate

And now we fight into the third and final round of this hellish battle between the Black Knight and the jabbering old goon. Not very exciting, is it? Is the idea to keep Barry from offending anyone? Well, mission accomplished. Let’s get some bloodshed! Red meat! Eh, no, it’s a debate. Always boring, terrible, and [...]

MCCAIN TRAVELING PRESS POOL REPORT, PRE-FLIGHT: “McCain now boarding plane at DCA with Cindy, Salter, Rudy Giuliani, wife Judith, and other aides plus pool. Heading to Memphis, 1:50 minute flight, then motorcade to site. General atmosphere is utter confusion.” [The Page]

The National Review hears something HMM: “One side effect of McCain’s debate gambit is, I’m told, that everyone at Ole Miss now hates him. It will make for a very hostile audience tonight among those students and faculty attending. He might have to apologize for creating the uncertainty or make some explanation up front, which [...]

Whew, that was close. Goofy old national joke John “Walnuts!” McCain had threatened to skip tonight’s debate unless he, uh, solved the Financial Crisis. Luckily for us, the 500-year-old clown can’t “keep his word” for more than a few minutes, so of course he’ll be at the debate tonight, unless he changes his mind again, [...]

“The McCain campaign is resuming all activities and the senator will travel to the debate this afternoon. Following the debate, he will return to Washington to ensure that all voices and interests are represented in the final agreement, especially those of taxpayers and homeowners.” WHAT’S THE DEAL, WALNUTS!? [Politico]

Here, on this Wall Street Journal web page featuring this op-ed by Henry Paulson’s wife “John Paulson,” a curious advertisement appeared. It was this one, captured by Wonkette Operative “Evan W.,” so now you know! McCain Wins Debate! He wins by … uh, refusing to even say if he’ll show up! Maverick! And look how [...]

Now that the legislative and executive branches of our government have negotiated a bailout compromise without John McCain flying in to spit and throw chairs and poop at people for 20 minutes, uh, what’s a Walnut to do hmm? He’ll probably fly down to Oxford town for the debate and look like a temperamental anger [...]

Two days ago John McCain admitted he hadn’t read Hank Paulson’s bailout plan yet. Paulson’s plan was written in words, after all, and these desperate times call for ACTION, not elitist do-nothing words. John McCain will mime his own bailout solution before Congress on Friday during the presidential debate. [YouTube via TPM]

Obama has a podium set up, and he’s going to make a statement! Let’s liveblog the biotch. Among the important questions: will Obama be wearing pants? Should Clay Aiken go to Washington to solve this crisis in his place, now that he’s a gay? GO GO GO…

DEBATEGATE, LULZ, HA: “Organizers said Wednesday they were going ahead as planned with the first 2008 US presidential debate, despite Republican John McCain’s call to postpone the event in the face of the Wall Street crisis. ‘We have been notified by the Commission on Presidential Debates that we are proceeding as scheduled,’ said the University [...]

Let us be clear, America: John McCain is a senile old coward, and his campaign is run by crazed dingbats who seem to honestly believe that hijacking a half-hour of the midday news cycle with another weird stunt is a good way to turn those polls around. It’s not. It’s just … embarrassing, for Earth. [...]

OH HO HO: “The debate is on,” a senior Obama campaign official tells ABC News. Jeebus! This is getting so sexy so quickly. Obama will somehow end up debating Michael Steele for eight hours tomorrow. [ABC News]

Here’s your Associated Press bulletin: AP NewsAlert Sep 24 02:51 PM US/Eastern NEW YORK (AP) – John McCain wants to delay debate with Obama to focus on economic crisis. Has there ever been another presidential campaign that consisted solely of dumb muppet stunts? [The Trail]