JOE BIDEN IS A GENIUS: “For this debate, for part of this next debate, do what I did for part of the last two debates. Literally, turn the sound off. I’m not being… I’m not joking now. Literally, turn the sound off.” No but seriously. Literally. [CBS News]
You may recall the second question from Tuesday night’s town hall debate from a young black fellow named Oliver Clark. Clark asked the candidates what the bailout package does for the Average American. McCain responded by attacking Obama for not regulating Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac — it was his ONE JOB AND HE BLEW [...]
Here it is again, my friends. It is also here. And here’s the fun entire debate, via C-SPAN, after the jump.
That debate was more boring than, uh… more boring than a Nordic opera singer being interviewed on Charlie Rose! More boring than the short-lived Pat Sajak Sunday night talk show on Fox News! MORE BORING THAN DAVID BROOKS SPARRING WITH ELEANOR CLIFT ON PUBLIC TELEVISION. Meaning, Obama didn’t say anything nutty, and Walnuts just made [...]
This is the first time your editor has really paid attention to those squiggly lines on the CNN independent voter torture graph. Wow! The uncommitted voters of Ohio do not like this John McCain character. The only time we’ve seen a real happy response to McCain was when he was talking very generally (and quite [...]
To your left is the shack where her editor spent her “vacation,” getting harassed by banana slugs and watching the VP debate in a bar full of scratch-off Lotto ticket addicts who muttered angry things about “Barack HUSSEIN Obama” on their way out. (Kidding! That is another one of John McCain’s eleventy billion subprime properties, [...]
AND NOW WE ARE ALL DUMBER: The early Nielsen ratings are in for last night’s debate, and they’re a full freaking 42% higher than the ratings from last Friday’s presidential debate, making it the most watched debate since Bush/Clinton/Perot in 1992. Jesus, we are a bizarre country. [The Live Feed]
PBS anchor Gwen Ifill, who will host Thursday’s debate between Joe Biden and Sarah Palin, purportedly broke her ankle “after tripping and falling down stairs at her home last night.” Oh well what a timely “accident,” and what a likely “story,” which sounds nothing like “intimidation.” CAN SOMEONE then, maybe, explain the letter found next [...]
Your associate editor was prepared to go to this funny-sounding debate party last Friday at the D.C. headquarters of libertarian masturbation pamphlet Reason, one for which Bob Barr was invited to yell at Obama and McCain on the teevee, live. Ineffectiveness and vanity on this level is, of course, the very essence of libertarianism. So [...]
Uhh, that’s your terrible & presiding president, “George,” with the sparkles. What’s his importance tonight. No one knows. No one knows why George Bush isn’t LOCKING THIS CRAP UP for Barry Obama. Who won this debate? Let’s see what the teevee pundits say, on CNN. Once it ends which will be never.
Jim Lehrer, you garish little Skittle whore! What kind of jacket is THAT? Slut slut slut Jim Lehrer is a slut. Oh god this debate is boring, we realized during our last moment of clarity. Time to open the Schlitz! Huh? Who are you people anyway. (Pre-blog & Part 1).
That’s WALNUTS! after downing his fifteen nightly Ambien. What a nut. But, he showed up for tonight’s debate, and that’s more than he was planning on yesterday! So give him credit HE WAS IN THE WAR FOR CHRIST’S SAKE JESUS. Anyway: tonight’s debate is about race. No. Foreign policy… of race? we have four 40s [...]
Here is a brilliant switcheroo! John McCain proposes delaying his debate if he has not singlehandedly resolved America’s financial crisis by tomorrow, so that way he and Barack Obama can debate next Thursday — the night when Sarah Palin and Joe Biden were set to debate. And then once they’ve rescheduled the Palin/Biden debate, John [...]
Hoorah the first debate is Friday, in Confederate Mississippi! Will the plantation owners even let Barack Obama onto the debate stage, or will he have to shout his answers from the balcony? That would be sure to spark a national conversation about race, between no one. But! We’ll see. This week, however, each campaign has [...]
Someone just sent us this comical article from an October, 2006 edition of the Anchorage Daily News — a reputable journal if ever there were! — about how Sarah Palin had a “scheduling conflict” during a gubernatorial debate with her two challengers and — instead of canceling her dumb conflict, because who cares — she [...]
