economy
Which Starbucks-drinking human who likes to drink Starbucks coffee during work breaks is trying to defend the ObamUlus TelLyPoopter WhaleFail package today? Just the CBO, a national corrupt community organizing commune for Gaynesian economists: “The massive stimulus package passed last year to blunt the impact of the worst U.S. recession in 70 years created up [...]
For the record, Obama is totally into jobs now, not health care. [New York Times] Obama also called for a repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, which means all those Facebook petitions worked!! [Los Angeles Times] Meet this latest thing you will own! It is called the iPad, and has literally no function other than [...]
Yay here is your Friday News Roundup of somebody else’s News Roundup regarding Tim Geithner and Larry Summers getting beaten up by greybeards Joe Biden and Paul Volcker! Biden and Volcker are, combined, 150 years old and 150 feet tall; also they are liberal hippies.
America’s economy has expanded for the first time in four quarters, presumably by exchanging the four quarters in for a dollar. [AP] An online anthology of song lyrics that do not quite merit away message status—”Twitter”—is America’s only successful business. [Reuters] Here is a linguistic Venn Diagram about the differences, similarities, and overlapping too-small-to-write-in sliver [...]
AMERICA TO BECOME SUPER RICH AGAIN WITH THIS THING: Today we are all Caulkers: “The president also recommended that Congress enact a new ‘cash for caulkers’ program, which would offer financial incentives for homeowners to weatherize their homes. Senior administration officials said the program, based on the successful ‘cash for clunkers’ automobile rebate program, would [...]
Look kids, this is what 10% unemployment looks like — one Men’s Room sign out of ten is filled with warm piss! The very important New York Times graphic adds, “That’s 15.7 million people. If the unemployed lived in one state, it would be the country’s fifth largest.” Great! Move ‘em all to one state, [...]
Now that the New American Economy’s only path to profitability hinges on major corporations slashing as many salaries as possible, it would be nice of the government to extend unemployment benefits a little longer for starving permanently unemployed people who will probably die soon. (7,000 new ones a day!) A few Dems introduced a simple [...]
YOU ARE ALL RICH SO STOP COMPLAINING: The economy grew at a 3.5% pace last quarter, with cash-for-clunkers helping boost durable good spending 22.3% and a federal tax credit for homebuyers increasing housing spending 23.4%. Now that members of the upper-middle class all have new cars and homes, the dough should be trickling down to [...]
IT’S LIKE A RECOVERY, BUT WITH NO EQUITY, SAVINGS, CONSUMER SPENDING, JOBS, RETIREMENT ACCOUNTS, INNOVATION, STRONG CURRENCY, AFFORDABLE HEALTH CARE, BASIC SHELTER, OR LONG-TERM PROSPECTS FOR A COMPETITIVE MODERN ECONOMY: “The housing market continues to threaten signs of an economic recovery, with new data released on Thursday showing an all-time high of Americans falling behind [...]
Here, would you like to see Sean Hannity having an awkward chat with Sarah Palin somewhere outdoors in New York City? No? Fine. Just, if you want to, here it is, and fuck you very much, Fox, for not having an embed function on your WEB EXCLUSIVE VIDEOS. [Fox News]
The New York Times has a SCOOP, about Larry Summers! He is still a dick to everybody, and the rest of the White House economics team pretty much hates him — except for the President, who endures his terrible behavior because he is so BRILLIANT.
