england
Good Friday-time, colonies! England, Land of Kings, would like to participate in what shallst now be titled, Thine Gloubal Tea Party Ninny Knickers Movement. The British Tea Party component shallst launch its first Proutestation this Saturday, and shallst be led by Sir Telegraph Writer Human Daniel Hannan, a “British fiscal conservative.” Actual tea shallst be [...]
The country England, which used to own America, has a terrible system of health care where people pay a bit more in taxes so that when they get sick, they can walk into a doctor’s office or a hospital to receive treatment. This is how Empires fall! But supposedly English people “like” their National Death [...]
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA, ‘IMPLIED,’ HAHA: Remember this thing from yesterday? It’s been FIX’D: “Editor’s Note: This version corrects the original editorial which implied that physicist Stephen Hawking, a professor at the University of Cambridge, did not live in the UK.” Indeed, quite so, yes, tut tut, some readers may have inferred that that is what the original [...]
You know where Stephen Hawking has lived for 67 years? England. Again: England. England. And this is why an editorial from the “Investors Business Daily” about Obama trying to kill Trig Palin for having Down Syndrome, one that was cited favorably in a Human Events press release today, has become the stuff from which humor-jokes [...]
An actual 21st-century human whose purpose in life is to slum around masturbating in the Royal Forest every day until his mother dies and he becomes “King of England,” after which his purpose in life will be to slum around masturbating in the Royal Forest every day, may never reacheth this apex of Masturbator-King of [...]
The YouTubes are flooded with protest videos from G20 where, in quieter quarters, Obama is giving the Queen an iPod filled with libidinous American “noise.” This offers a good Aerial Shot, though, of the protesters — whose parents are probably inside the conference, deciding interest rate policy — taunting the Bobbies, who simply have to [...]
A fancy Tory named Professor John Beddington is worried about that the “growing world population will cause a ‘perfect storm’ of food, energy and water shortages by 2030.” He’s the “chief government scientist” of England, too, so he is basically Al Gore in knickers. Anyway, this will starve out mostly the poor countries, so we’re… [...]
COMICAL SUNDAY READING: The Independent landed a sit-down with former Hillary Clinton campaign chief strategist Mark “Bowser” Penn during one of his awful British speaking engagements and JESUS, the write-up reads as if Mark Penn had once sodomized and tortured and eaten every member of this reporter’s family! It’s titled “Mark Penn: The man who [...]
Crabby queen writer Gore Vidal, who is certainly older than you, appeared on the English telly after Obama’s clinch last night to discuss American politics with the Britons. Appropriately, he went insane for several minutes after asking and receiving permission to “talk the facts of life” with the BBC anchor. Whenever he is asked a [...]
