fatties
A Catholic church in Denver loves to bury the remains of aborted fetuses, no doubt to remind the priests of all the children they missed out on abusing. [Hyscience] That filthy obesity propagandist (and enormous fatty) Michelle Obama keeps perpetuating the myth that the gross-inflation of our national midriff is somehow bad for America. [DRScoundrels] [...]
Last week was probably not the best for our beloved FLOTUS. On Monday, famed underwear model Rush Limbaugh grumbled some crazy-speak about how our Michelle ate ribs one time, which made her too fat to be on the cover of Sports Illustrated, or something. To make matters worse, New Jersey Governor and Professional Fat Person [...]
Today, most of America’s children are happily sedated from an all-night candy binge conditioning exercise. They are taking their giant pillowcases of winnings to school and bragging about who scored more free Snickers bars, because that is the meaning of Freedom. But this is not the case for the children who were subjected to a [...]
A new study of the world’s rich countries says that America’s fatness levels will increase from the current 70% to more than 75% by the year 2020, but other nations are working hard to catch up — including our neighbors in Canada (6th fattest) and Mexico (2nd place). According to the Organization for Economic Cooperation [...]
American honor-restorer Glenn Beck is so mad about obesity right now, because it costs taxpayers billions of dollars and that is wrong. On his teevee show, he complained about “those fat people that sit on their couch” — you know, the ones whose skin actually “grows into their couch,” until the fire department has to [...]
Huzzah for the Can-Do spirit of Americans, who continue to just pile on the pounds despite the nation’s crushed economy. Turns out you don’t need much money to become obese! And without jobs, Americans have more time than ever to sit in front of teevee eating another bucket of corn-syrup taco-ball cheezey-poop pasta-bowl Grease Dipperz™. [...]
Mike Huckabee was just another fat wingnut Southern emperor until, however many years ago, he realized that he was going to die from the Fat Cancer. He freaked and lost an actual 4,500 pounds and wrote a book about how he became un-fat. It was a success because, for some reason, illiterate people will buy [...]
