georgia
With handsome devil Carte Goodwin scheduled to be sworn in as Robert Byrd’s seat-warming replacement sometime today, Democrats (plus the reliable communist ladies from Maine) should be able to break the Republican filibuster and get that lucrative government money flowing to the unemployed again, huzzah! Plus they plan to spend the whole midterm campaigning telling [...]
Meet your new GOP friend/hero, Herman Cain. He’s “an African-American Republican, a former chief executive of Godfather’s Pizza, a cancer survivor — and the host of a popular radio show in Georgia.” A brand-new movement called Draft Cain 2012 is using Facebook technology to make Cain our next president. But is America ready for “the [...]
POLITICAL MOVEMENT BASED ON DEDICATION TO IDEOLOGICAL PURITY BREAKS INTO MUTUALLY HOSTILE FACTIONS, SHOCKING EVERYBODY: Georgia has a claim on the being the birthplace of the Tea Party movement, so naturally the “movement” there is now represented by three different organizations — the Georgia Tea Party Patriots, the State of Georgia Tea Party, LLC, and [...]
Angry voters in a state dominated by conservative white people have turned on their long-running Congressman! Alan Mollohan has represented the good people of his slice of West Virginia for 28 years now, but his support for that tax-demon Obama’s various West Virginia-destroying schemes, like cap-and-trade and the health care plan that will pay for [...]
LIBERAL FASCIST COPS BREAK UP GOOD CLEAN FUN: A quintet of Georgians were arrested for building a bunch of pipe bombs, but they claim that they just wanted to “play” with the deadly explosives, blowin’ up shit in their backyard for fun! The group says that they “stole materials from a residential property with trailers [...]
WHY DID OBAMA PERSONALLY PUT A MICROCHIP IN THIS LADY’S ANUS? Here is a lady testifying before the Georgia legislature about banning microchip implantation in humans, which she claimed the Defense Department did to her: “I’m also one of the people in Georgia who has a microchip… Microchips are like little beepers. Just imagine, if [...]
Just keep watching, the payoff is worth it. Will Guam “tip over and capsize” if 8,000 Marines and their families move there? Hmmm, let’s see, just give us a moment to consider the question …. ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE? This is U.S. Representative Hank Johnson, D-Georgia. And there’s a sad reason for his confusion, which [...]
The best part about passing this health care bill, AND THERE ARE SO MANY GOOD PARTS, is all the assassinations and torrential violence we’ll have across the country, from confused people! FOR IT HAS HAPPENED HERE BEFORE: you know of what we speak. The “War of Yankee Aggression,” as Georgia Rep. Paul Broun calls it [...]
Atlanta’s public transportation system “MARTA” is in so much trouble today for being racist against Asians. See, the MARTA people, the Martians, renamed the train line that goes where all the Asian people live the “yellow line.” And “yellow,” everyone knows, is the worst Coldplay song ever invented. Everyone just hates it, including Asians.
Georgia slaveowner Sen. Saxby Chambliss recently participated in this thing from National Geographic, which “invited all 100 U.S. Senators to draw a map of their home state from memory and to label at least three important places.” Most of the participating Senators sketched their states admirably. Chambliss, meanwhile, drew Mississippi, but with more saw teeth [...]
Poor Georgia Congressman and gubernatorial candidate Nathan Deal. He was trying in Congress this one time to make sure that all illegals either show their birth certificates or die, but then the “ghetto grandmothers” complained that they did not have their birth certificates handy. Oh, those old ladies in the ghetto! Deal has apologized, but [...]
JOE BIDEN WILL THROW DOWN ANYWHERE, ANYTIME: So Barack Obama wanted to get rid of Joe Biden for the day and settled on sending him to Georgia, to say “hi” to the flood victims down there. Immediately after arriving, Joe Biden addressed the local disaster relief officials and proclaimed, “They’re all doing one heck of [...]
