governors
Welfare Queen and prominent asshole Gov. Mark Sanford of South Carolina, who continues to simultaneously call Barack Obama a sack of shit and ask Barack Obama to pay off his state debt, said today that Obama’s spending policies will lead to Zimbabwe-style hyperinflation, the only real-world situation in which the term “11 million percent” can [...]
Look everybody, it’s your new failed Commerce Secretary nominee, Gary Locke. At least that’s what the reporters are saying! He is what the AP terms a “Chinese-American,” which could mean anything. He was the first “Chinese-American” governor of Washington, the state, from 1997 to 2005. So why will he have to withdraw? Eh, who knows, [...]
Here’s a preview of former Illinois Gov. “Rod” Blagojevich on tonight’s episode of the David Letterman show. This may have been a step too far for Blago — in case you forgot, he has a real trial coming up, for “criminal” charges — because Letterman at 89 years old is still rather deft at asking [...]
Hey look it’s wacky Terry McAuliffe’s first ad for governor of Virginia, the first of the 2009 season! It aired during the Super Bowl in select Virginia markets (“Hell”). Basically he tells Virginia that if he wins, then Hillary Clinton will stage a big primary comeback in Puerto Rico and we’ll all get wasted. [Terry [...]
Well this is surreal! What a waste of time and taxpayer money this Illinois Senate impeachment trial is, just rehashing comical two-month old quotes from the teevee news. Apparently they played the actual recordings of Blago’s famously profane Senate seat auction, though, and you can listen to them here. He has the voice of an [...]
RACISTS IMPEACH BLAGO: “SPRINGFIELD—In a historic vote, the Illinois House has impeached Gov. Rod Blagojevich, directing the Senate to put the state’s 40th chief executive on trial with the goal of removing him from office. The vote by the House was 114-1 and marks the first time in the state’s 190-year history that a governor [...]
Can Virginia’s favorite horse-torture fetishist and wacky hair goblin, Gov. Tim Kaine, heal America’s Democrats after the long Clinton-Obama primary battle? No, no one can. That is known. But he can do other stuff, like expand the Democrats’ electoral map (FAP FAP FAP) as the new head of the DNC, which he now is. Hooray [...]
Blago, he’s good today. He set up this press conference to announce his surprise Senate pick, and here he is, dressed to the nines, punctual, grinning, even rattling off a few well-turned sentences in Mexican. He knows he’s politically outmaneuvered Harry Reid, which is perhaps the easiest achievement known to man, but still: “Blagojevich’s news [...]
It seems DADDY over there in the Senate wants to give “the people” the right to fill Obama’s Senate seat, which would be a vulgar trashing of the Constitution, taking the choice away from the potty-mouth arrested governor who is on tape trying to sell it, for money, and what not.
Ha, we all had a general idea about the atmospherics of “Chicago politics” — various scenarios involving sludge and trades and wires and smoke and $$$ come to mind, all smelling like dry air and farts — but when it invades Real America’s national news, all we want to do is cry! It’s like they [...]
Loveable Pennsylvania Gov. Ed Rendell has opened his fat trap yet again, this time on a hot mic, to celebrate the selection of Arizona Gov. Janet Napolitano as Secretary of Homeland Security. He tells a friend that she’ll do well because she’s a fucking unmarried childless loser: “Janet’s perfect for that job. Because for that [...]
Barack Obama and his nutball friend Joe Biden attended a meeting of the National Governors Association today, which is very similar to the recent Republican Governors Association meeting except for the part in which every speaker calls the Democrats a bunch of fags multiple times. Joe Biden delivered some prepared remarks, and included in these [...]
