illegal immigrants
Immigrants in this country are facing a whole list of problems these days, one of those problems being, of course, the insane people and laws that seek to force them out of their homes. Luckily, the timing on this is perfect, because just as much as immigrants need new, non-threatening places to live, America’s Worst [...]
Alabama is just the latest backwards state to legally codify its crusader witch hunt against the illegal immigrant wizards working their back-breaking field labor black magick on Alabama’s giant agriculture industry, but the state’s recently-enacted set of draconian worst-ever anti-immigrant laws are working a little too fast: zillions of Alabama tomatoes are rotting away in [...]
What do we always know about America’s myriad unsolved problems? They are the fault of the illegalz. Recently, the illegalz have been trying to burn down all of Arizona with their chronic pyromaniac ruthlessness, according to senior desert wildfire detective Sen. John McCain. Asked by reporters at a press conference, “what’s the deal and how [...]
HOUSTON—Coming up tonight on 11 News at 10: Morning Anchor Christine Haas reveals some illegal immigrants are receiving sex change hormones while behind bars, and tax payers are footing the bill. Here it is! The Perfect Storm! Is there any way this tiny statistic could converge with atheism and abortions as well? YOU HAVE TO [...]
The House passed the DREAM Act last night for some reason, even though it will certainly be filibustered in the Senate. But that’s not a knock on it. The House should feel free to pass stuff they think the Senate will filibuster. It seems like they may finally no longer be afraid of that giant [...]
Ah yes, in the epic battle of Fearful Podunk Nevada White v. Scary Mexicans On Security Tape In Gang Clothing, Harry Reid has joined up with the latter. And yet, Harry Reid looks like a normal white person? And yet he has not defunded these important green security cameras that are keeping our borders safe? [...]
Some of you sheeple are probably voting for the candidates with the best “ideas” in November, which is embarrassing and ignorant. Real Americans vote for the political hack with the most money to spend on slanderous teevee ads and racist billboards. This is how proper Democracy works, so please stop with the sniveling. But if [...]
It was bad enough when the Messicans came across the border to steal our economy and manufacturing (migrant farming) jobs. But now they have turned into Horrifying PIRATES who ride around on JET SKIS killing Americans for no reason at all. This is according to Fox News, who had some dead guy’s wife on Fox [...]
By the Comics CurmudgeonIt is hard to move Lindsey Graham to anger, but once moved, his rage is implacable, and only a constitutional amendment can satisfy him. Lindsey is mad at babies, of course — babies who have the misfortune of being pushed through a birth canal that is lousy with Foreignness, but then land [...]
Republican Florida state house candidate Marg Baker has won the Internet celebrity sweepstakes for suggesting that Florida send illegal immigrants “out to the middle of the country and put up high walls and leave them there.” You know, get ‘em off the streets, make ‘em disappear. Like the “e” in her name! Seriously, where did [...]
Lindsey Graham needs to show his “true-blue conservative values,” somehow, what with his well-known gayness and love for Elena Kagan. What better way to do this than to dream up a new way to kick more brown people out of the country? There’s nothing that says “conservative” like changing laws that have been in place [...]
Iowa Rep. Steve King, the #1 asshole in Congress, is exhibiting the more compassionate side of his asshole today (gross) in response to the Haitian crisis. Like many wingnuts, Steve King does not support granting temporary protected status (TPS) to undocumented Haitians living within the United States — a.k.a. he don’t support none dem Mexicans [...]
GRRR, BARACK OBAMA MAKEY SO ANGRY! Now let’s compare this Fox headline to a grown-up’s headline: “Obama halts deportations of undocumented Haitian immigrants, urged to grant ‘protected status.’” So what Obama is doing, at the urging of most rational, humane people, is halting Haitian deportations during a humanitarian crisis back in Haiti. It’s a fairly [...]
