Wonkette

• OH DON’T MIND US, LADIES: Hey Matt Jaffe and Rick Klein of ABC “News,” did we st-st-stutter when we wrote this story like a million years ago with “Must Credit Wonkette And Its Tipster, ‘John’” in the headline? No, and now “John” is sobbing, probably. JAKE TAPPER would’ve credited us because HE’S THE MAN and ADORABLE. [ABC "Lose"]

ABC News Senior National Correspondent Jake Tapper was on to Barack Obama’s resurgent smoking habit months ago, but the Obama campaign covered for the ever-more-desperate candidate as he wove a web of deception that eventually ensnared the nation in cancer and betrayal. Way back in August Obama was wandering around the Capitol reeking of smoke, and what did Obama’s people say when Concerned Jake asked about it? MORE »

Congratulations to ABC’s square-jawed Jake Tapper, who, despite his on-going hostage crisis, has snared himself a wife, and an item in the prestigious New York Times “Vows” section. Tapper married Jen Brown of Planned Parenthood, thus justifying any and all claims of liberal bias in ABC’s reporting. Jen’s “father owns and operates US 1 Dollar, an independent general merchandise store in Lenexa, Kan.,” a sentence we are pretty sure has never appeared in the Vows section before this weekend. Good luck, you crazy kids! And send us some wedding pictures, we couldn’t make it out to Kansas City. MORE »

First they put the White House press corps in a trailer.

And now the toilet is clogged.

What do the reporters who work closest to President Bush on a daily basis have in common with refugees from Hurricane Katrina?

-Mark Silva, Chicago Tribune White House correspondent. MORE »

A visibly tired President Bush, back from his surprise visit to Iraq, just concluded an hour-long press conference. It took place in the Rose Garden, and most of the questions focused on Iraq. MORE »

You need keen eyes to spot celebrities in this town — unless, of course, they herald their own presence, as did Bill Cosby and Thomas Friedman this week. It’s also hard to keep a low profile if you’re sporting a shock of silver hair, like Anderson Cooper, or have a nuclear-family-sized security squad, like Anthony Williams.

George Stephanopoulos must have a fetish for being Wonk’d, because he can’t seem to stay hidden. But even discretion doesn’t work all the time, as Condi Rice found out. It’s also totally impossible to be inconspicuous if you’re 7′2″ — and Dikembe Mutombo doesn’t even try.

We all know they’re dying to be seen, so just help feed their celebrit-ego by sending us all your sightings, by email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with of the name of the spotted celeb). On behalf of all the dying-for-attention famous people out there, we thank you.

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Their blogging can be just as random as ADD-afflicted as anyone else’s, dammit! MORE »

• Lack of bias for thee but not for me: Washington Times reporter (and Christian) Bill Sammon believes “Most stories…have a moral dimension, and ignoring that dimension misrepresents the news.” [Christian Examiner via Romenesko]
• CNN lost viewers under Jon Klein. You know what this means: MORE COOPER. [TVNewser]
• ABC-purchased Grand Theft Auto changes Jake Tapper’s life, providing street cred and razor sharp instincts to hide when the scent of pigs is in the air. [Down and Dirty via FishbowlDC]
• NBC names new news division prez… and they’re going to look into this whole “news on the web” thing. Also CBS Evening News gets a producer. Is that still on? [NYT, AP]
• Bizarre disappearing John Huey mugs. [Gawker]