john edwards
Sleazy but “better than John Edwards” person Andrew Young, who illegally sucked John Edwards off every night before bedtime until realizing “hey I can write a tell-all and make big bucks,” is in super big-time trouble. A judge is threatening to send him and his wife Cheri — that’s his real wife; his fake wife [...]
YOU & THAH BASTARD CAN LIVE IN MAH MILL: “John Edwards has proposed to his mistress Rielle Hunter, and is buying a luxury $3.5 million beachfront home where they can live happily ever after with their love child, The ENQUIRER has learned exclusively.” Right but how awesome is this graphic? [Enquirer]
Hey, here’s a hilarious way to get someone to find your secret, life/career/marriage-ruining sex tape that you filmed with a minor Jay McInerney character: lazily and shadily unwind some of the tape and label it “SPECIAL.” Because no one will want to quickly put it back together and watch it!
Whoa hey Elizabeth Edwards has left her Johnny finally, according to the People magazine. Hmm. Was there… a problem? As usual, this is poor baby Quinn’s fault: “After meeting the love child that rocked her 32-year marriage to one-time presidential candidate John Edwards, Elizabeth Edwards has had enough… Last December, Elizabeth met the 23-month-old Frances [...]
Have you read the Wall Street Journal‘s review of Andrew Young’s book THE POLITICIAN about John Edwards yet?? It’s not really a review so much as a “check out all of these fucked up things John Edwards did while running for president” laundry list. +1, Wall Street Journal.
WHAT IS THE JOHN EDWARDS SEX TAPE LIKE? Fancy reporting, Gawker, about John Edwards and his boning on camera. We’ve already seen it. There’s a still, to your left, with the three main participants. [Gawker]
Well well well! Well. Well. Well. HMM. John Edwards has arrived in Haiti to do relief work. He is perhaps the only person on Earth right now who can volunteer to bring doctors, food, and supplies to dying Haitians and become more of a monstrous asshole by doing so.
Well! John Edwards, he of corrupt temperament and “Scott Brown good looks,” announced this morning apropos of nothing that he is the father of his baby, John Edwards’ Baby. This admission follows a two-year bad-faith charade in which Edwards denied impregnating inconsequential Jay McInerney character Rielle Hunter. Turns out there’s a trashy-sounding Edwards campaign tell-all [...]
Look what’s up for pre-sale, everybody: the memoir from John Edwards’ famous ex-slave, Andrew Young, about how he would blow and grundle-pump ol’ Haircut every morning for years, only to be rewarded with an order to claim the fatherhood of John Edwards’ bastard child. Hey, publisher’s website? We think you have the wrong Andrew Young [...]
JOHN EDWARDS WANTED HIS WIFE TO DIE CONSTANTLY: The New York Times obliterated John Edwards this weekend, with its report about how he’s preparing to FINALLY be like, “yeah that’s mah baby.” Most terrifying part: “In the [book] proposal, which The New York Times examined, [former aide Andrew] Young says that he assisted the affair [...]
Hey look it’s an Edwards story that is *not* about how a self-regarding butthole managed to continually embarrass himself and his family of mill workers with his bathroom-dwelling, mistress-impregnating antics. It’s a nice story about Mrs. Elizabeth Edwards, and her new furniture store in Chapel Hill!
From his teevee-anchor dyed & blow-dried hair to his repulsive stucco fortress on a million acres of North Carolina scraped dirt, everything about the ambulance-chasing personal injury attorney has always cried FRAUD, but the most disgusting part about Edwards was his phony public displays of fucky love for his poor (yet fantastically rich) old wife, [...]
Ooh hot tawdry news regarding the dippy videographer who had sex with John Edwards and then, some months later, had a baby, which is maybe just coincidence! This woman, Rielle Hunter, was spotted entering a courthouse in Raleigh earlier this morning.
WHAT’S GROSSER THAN GROSS? “While he was unpacking, Young discovered a videocassette, according to the book pitch. Hunter had been hired by the Edwards campaign to videotape the candidate’s movements, but this one is said to have shown him taking positions that weren’t on his official platform.” [New York Daily News]
by Ken Layne
COMMENT OF THE DAY: Regarding John Edwards’ long-delayed admission that he knocked up that new-age video gal and made her hide his baby all this time, commenter Vewol Mevemont says, “That child is the grandson of a mill worker.” And that, friends, is made of WIN.