• February 13, 2012

lizards

ALSO A KENYAN

British Lizard Queen Celebrates 60 Earth Years of Oppression

by Wonkette Jr.

1:21 pm February 6, 2012

Is everyone super excited about the “Diamond Jubilee” of America’s queen of hearts, Elizabeth II? They should be, after her exciting performance at yesterday’s American football spectacular “half time.” Here is the well-known story we all recite to ourselves each night before flogging our own flesh with a thorny wooden portrait of Our Queen: Sixty [...]

COLD BLOODS

Donald Rumsfeld Refuses To Answer Whether Or Not He’s a Lizard Person

by Jack Stuef

10:48 am February 25, 2011

ARE DONALD RUMSEFELD AND DICK CHENEY LIZARD PEOPLE FROM OUTER SPACE WHO EAT HUMAN FLESH? For years, this is the one question the world has wanted to ask, as it is the only rational explanation for two beings that look human but in no way acted like it when they were in office. Yesterday, the [...]

THE WAR ON LIZARD PEOPLE

Only Lizards Could Devise Things So Evil As Reconciliation And ‘Pass And Deem’

by Jim Newell

7:05 pm March 16, 2010

RIP OFF YOUR MASKS, COLD-BLOODS!

METHUSELAH

by Ken Layne

1:27 pm August 6, 2008

IS CINDY (OR A LOBBYIST) PREGNANT? “111-Year-Old Reptile To Be Father For First Time In Decades.” [AP/FOX]