meth
Meth-hungry gay hooker aficionado and Jesus salesman Ted “Swear I’m Not A Homo” Haggard is back in the news for agreeing to sell his wife to Gary Busey on national television in exchange for money that they will each be paid for doing this, as “popular entertainment.” We sincerely hope that the tapes of this [...]
Former leading Bush evangelical megachurch pastor/guy who did crystal meth with gay prostitutes Ted Haggard is featured in the February issue of Gentlemen’s Quarterly, so that gentlemen can remove their top hats and waistcoats, sit down at the chair with some light reading, and laugh at him. “I cried when the Chilean miners got rescued. [...]
Tom DeLay is back in court today for the “sentencing phase” of his trial. Although DeLay “faces up to life in prison on the money laundering charge and up to 20 years on the conspiracy charge,” he is also “white” and “eligible for probation.” And apparently many Experts believe he will receive probation. Haha, oh [...]
From the noble Brownstones of Brooklyn to the hilltop villas of Malibu that fall onto incoming traffic whenever there’s a mudslide, America is full of architectural gems. So it’s rather worrisome that New Orleans officials are planning to rid their city of the last remaining FEMA trailers — national treasures which are widely recognized as [...]
The most important thing you can do for your country at this moment is buy a “WHERE’S THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE?” billboard, but you probably don’t know where to start. “How do I make a sign that big?” you’re asking yourself, “And how do I get the money? Small businesses are hurting everywhere, including my own [...]
NEWS SHOCKER: Meg Stapleton, holder of the World’s Worst Job as spokeswoman for an increasingly fragile and erratic unemployed publicity hound, had to once again explain at the very last minute how Sarah Palin would not be headlining an event that the event organizers thought she would be headlining. This happens every five days or [...]
Like Sarah Palin said last night, mayors have Actual Responsibilities, unlike community organizers who just help poor people stay alive after their steel plant jobs are outsourced. And Sarah Palin’s responsibilities included funding “the meth capitol of Alaska,” as Alaskan State Troopers call the Wasilla region: “When authorities surrounded a converted bus housing a meth [...]
