mike huckabee
Excess skin collection bucket Mike Huckabee has been having a ball ever since he discovered how devastatingly cheaply Taiwanese animators are able to computer visualize his conservative evangelical sex fantasies. His library of cartoon videos is so far is mostly fantasia flavors of “Reagan + Jesus kill black muggers and Nazis,” which are all pretty [...]
Hey, kids! Do you like learning history but hate it that your teacher never tells you the story of the time Ronald Reagan and Jesus Christ teamed up to defeat the Nazis? Of course you do. America’s Original Fat Governor Mike Huckabee is here with a series of horribly animated cartoons featuring his team of [...]
Mike Huckabee is holding onto his job at Fox New just fine. Glenn Beck is losing his. Glenn Beck and his giggling band of parrot radio co-hosts call Mike Huckabee a “progressive” for supporting Michelle Obama in her anti-obesity initiatives. Mike Huckbaee takes him down in a statement, saying Beck spoke about the initiatives “either [...]
We are deep into the first year of the 2012 campaign — haha, only 18 more months to go! — and already the Republican Base is so depressed and disgusted by their awful slate of candidates that some experts believe the GOP won’t be able to get anyone to the polls, because of mass suicide [...]
At some point one of the two top-tier Republican frontrunners, Donald Trump and Mike Huckabee (haha, this is still funny), are going to have to leave their Fox deals and run, right? Is the Fox money really better than going down in the column in history books that lists the loser of each presidential election? [...]
PPP surveyed Mississippi Republican voters, and it turns out most of them aren’t shy about letting random people who call them up on the phone at dinner know how racist they are. Just 40% of them said interracial marriage should be legal, whereas 46% forcefully said it should be illegal. It’s a sign that Mississippi [...]
Mother Jones is apparently looking through the public records of the lame Republican presidential candidates these days (maybe THEY can figure out which of those Trump birth certificates/strands of hair are real), and they hit a snag when they requested Mike Huckabee’s from his time as governor of Arkansas. Apparently Mike Huckabee never was governor [...]
2012 DILDO NEWS: “The most recent vibrator is Mike Huckabee,” reports George Will. George Will will not allow Republicans who talk about Barack Obama’s Kenyan birth to be the next president of the United States. That is uncouth. So, like a sporting gentleman, he will refer to them as dildos until they go away.
Mike Huckabee said the word “starlet.” And then he said this: “Most single moms are very poor, uneducated, can’t get a job, and if it weren’t for government assistance, their kids would be starving to death and never have health care.” He was talking about Natalie Portman, who mentioned at the Academy Awards on Sunday [...]
Last week was probably not the best for our beloved FLOTUS. On Monday, famed underwear model Rush Limbaugh grumbled some crazy-speak about how our Michelle ate ribs one time, which made her too fat to be on the cover of Sports Illustrated, or something. To make matters worse, New Jersey Governor and Professional Fat Person [...]
According to Frank Bailey’s leaked tell-all book, Sarah Palin’s inner circle didn’t believe she had a chance at getting the vice-presidential nomination in 2008. That didn’t mean they didn’t think she was right for high executive office; in fact, they worked with and fed information to a college student who ran a Palin-for-president website, and [...]
How many days until Christmas? Just 358 days! Oh man, next Xmas is gonna punish, especially if we get Mike Huckabee’s dream gift, which is a box of 1,000 copies of his Xmas book, signed by Jesus and pooped out by reindeer over Iowa. Thanks to “Kevin H.” for the funny bookstore picture.
