nationals
The three-day fuckoff of BBQs and booze that marks the end of summer is unfortunately here. Real Americans are taking the dollar or two they have left in their bank accounts, loading their Winnebagos with beef jerky, and heading to the local landfill for the weekend. But if you’re doing Labor Day the Elite Way [...]
Thursday, August 26, and Friday, August 27: Women don’t like baseball and neither do kids with peanut allergies, but both breeds are being lured to Nationals Stadium this week by jewelry, handbags and EpiPens. On Thursday, the Nationals are hosting a Vegas themed pre-game party complete with massages and manicures for all womenfolk in DC. [...]
Greetings, sports fans. Here’s your update about sports teams in the great District of Columbia. Even though the Caps suffered a crushing defeat and everyone was sad, all is not lost on the DC sports front. The District still has two other mediocre sports teams you can watch all summer long: The Washington Nationals, our [...]
And now for your weekly update from the Wonkette Sunday Sports Desk: some people are losing some games, others are winning, whatever. But this weekend was a treat for the seven or eight Washington Nationals season-ticket holders, whose perforated booklets landed on the annual “Beat That Gal (Daughter? Wife? It Doesn’t Matter) Next To You” [...]
Thursday, August 20: Womenfolk don’t like baseball, so to lure them to a game, the Nats are hosting a women-friendly pre-game tomorrow night. Recognizing that ladies may be frightened by this unnatural habitat, the Nats are offering things only women love: massages and manicures. And because all women love to shop, jewelry, handbags, cosmetics and [...]
Well crap. Somehow it’s almost the end of July. This is when you start thinking, “what the hell have I been doing with my summer?” DON’T LET YOUR SUMMER GO TO WASTE. Our political leaders have traveled, had affairs, and resigned; stars have died; Iran blew up; Honduras went all crazy. You deserve to have [...]
While the economy continued to melt down over the weekend, Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke spent a few hours hiding from his life at a Washington Nationals baseball game! Alas, he could not escape his horrible, horrible sadness: “Like at every other professional sporting event, a couple minutes is devoted to throwing out free t-shirts [...]
