nevada
America’s first black Senate Majority Leader, Harry Reid, was written off for dead by the so-called experts because of the mighty, mighty Republican/Teabagger opponents running against him in Nevada. Gosh, the Tea Party even drove many of their sedans and creaking RVs to Reid’s tiny mining-post hometown of Searchlight, where Alaskan anger bear Sarah Palin [...]
As illustrated by this frightening photograph that has nothing to do with this particular news story — except for the Krazy Chicken Furry harassing some sort of political staffers — a Chicken Furry is a very terrifying thing, especially for political people. What will the chicken do? Will it hold you down and make “chicken [...]
Does anyone outside of Nevada remember America’s Worst Governor, drunken idiot slimeball waitress-assaulting Jim Gibbons, a red-faced beady-eyed turd so stupid and crooked that even Nevada’s Republicans have spent the past three rotten years mocking and attacking his incompetent, missing-in-action term as governor?
Oh well, here she is, Miss Also America, proving once again why nobody would give her a job as a local-teevee-news announcer because GAH nails on chalkboard, etc. Your editor almost drove out to the southern Nevada mining town of Searchlight to witness this public-speaking abortion. But, honestly, being in the same town as Sarah [...]
Look at these ten losers — just absolute losers, these people, the Tea Party celebrities — with their cartoon video about going to Harry Reid’s empty bumfuck hometown to make catcalls about his critically injured family or whatever, and maybe have a few brews. And when stunts like this manage to knock the tepid, center-right, [...]
Oh look it’s some gross news about the gross governor of Nevada, one Jim Gibbons, who once disgusted his state of hookers and gambling addicts by assaulting a waitress! According to a legal deposition, Jim Gibbons has not gotten laid by a lady since nineteen hundred and ninety-five.
GIBBONS MARRIAGE OFFICIALLY OVER: Philandering Nevada governor and alcoholic sex crook Jim Gibbons is a single man as of two days ago. His campaign manager congratulated the governor on taking the “high-road position” in the divorce proceedings and said “the governor has been very respectful of Dawn.” (The governor’s attorney once compared her to an [...]
ENSIGN’S PARENTS GIVING MONEY TO MISTRESSES AGAIN: Looks like Nevada’s two biggest money people, John Ensign’s mommy and daddy, are yet again dipping into their retirements for their son’s protection: “Mike and Sharon Ensign, who made waves in July after admitting to giving $96,000 to Ensign’s mistress and her family, each gave the maximum $4,800 [...]
The only thing Nevada hates more than its loathed Senator Harry Reid is the possibility of a “Reid Political Dynasty,” wherein Reids of all variations of rounded, wire-frame glasses manage to become elected to public office throughout the state. So why then does Harry Reid’s son, alliterative nuisance Rory Reid, insist on running for governor [...]
A group of important politicians, including Senators Harry Reid and John Ensign and also the beloved waitress-assaulting alcoholic buffoon Governor Jim Gibbons, gathered ’round uncomfortably to dedicate a new 2900-acre shooting park in Clark County, Nevada yesterday. Ensign reportedly “gazed into his lap, fiddling with his wedding band, turning it this way and that, slipping [...]
Here is what we know about John Ensign: he was schtupping his buddy’s wife for six months or so until they got caught, at which point Ensign begged his old parents to give his buddy $96,000 in hush money (that worked out in the end!), which they did, spread across eight $12,000 checks to various [...]
We are just not getting a lot of resignation bang for our philandering buck this summer. Argentine romancer Mark Sanford looks like he’ll stay in the South Carolina governorship, basically because his wife said he could. And now it appears that John Ensign — barring, ha ha, some devastating investigation by CREW or the Justice [...]
Nevada’s flagrant heterosexual senator, John Ensign, told his Republican pals today at lunch that he was very sorry he had sex with some lady he should not have had sex with. He was “very contrite, very sincere,” said one of his colleagues, and as penance Ensign immediately retired to the nearest public bathroom for gay [...]
Gee, usually when married people publicly confess to having a hot dirty sex affair with some person they’re not married to, folks stand up and cheer! But for poor Senator John Ensign, it has only made him less popular. How exactly are he and fellow Republican adulterer Governor Jim Gibbons supposed to defeat the Mormon [...]
Sorry, folks! This is what passes for SEXY SEX SCANDAL NEWS this June, while “important news” such as the incipient Iranian revolution and doomed healthcare reform dominate our boring news channels. Doug Hampton, the husband of that lady John Ensign had sex with, wrote to Megyn Kelly at Fox News five days before Ensign confessed [...]
