Wonkette

Wonkette videographer Liz Glover is rapidly becoming the most famous person in Washington, D.C., and if you need proof, here she is partying with our city’s racist football team, the Redskins. She scored an invite to the 28th birthday party for Santana Moss, a very talented footballer! She meets a number of other All Stars there too — including Moss’ brother, “Sinorice” — and asks them about all the tragic hazing they play on the rookies, many of whom will be scarred permanently and later settle for dead-end jobs as Hill staffers. [Examiner]

This Saturday is the annual White House Correspondents Association dinner in Washington D.C., a.k.a. former Wonkette editor Alex Pareene’s favorite night of the year! And as in previous years, your Wonkette will not be going to the stupid dinner but will be attending after parties thrown by various Main Stream Media publications and networks. One of the most select is the Bloomberg party, the organizers of which HAVE NOT RETURNED OUR E-MAIL YET but did let this random DUDE in who obviously plans on cheating on his boyfriend, with a Wingboy. [Craigslist]

Last night was a very special night in Austin. A lady and a gentleman named Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, respectively, got up on a stage in “the LBJ Library,” which was actually the gymnasium a ten-minute walk from the LBJ Library, and they discussed how they would rule the nation when they are presidents. Your crack Wonkette Deputy Operative “Dan” was there to record this magical event in photos. Many more and a Flickr gallery, after the jump. MORE »

Do you remember the swinging social scene of early-1960s Washington? So many parties with those fun-loving and oft-assassinated Kennedy boys! And then George W. Bush ruined it all when he was appointed president four decades later. That’s the gist of this six-hundred-page Vanity Fair recollection about the glamorous good old days of yesteryear, and it prompted one Washingtonian to pen the following recollection of the glamorous Clinton years.

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Every now and then, we come across legitimate excuses to get trashed on a Monday - proof of God’s everlasting love for the working man (and woman, I guess). If you’re still in the District and have yet plan out your New Year’s festivities, you’ve got quite a few options for how to spend your final evening of 2007 (some more expensive than others). It’s been one hell of a year, and we’re going to try to make it one hell of a night. MORE »

This morning, the entire gay community of Washington sent us a link to Metro Weekly’s photo gallery of local teh coalition of teh geyz, Axis of Fun, at its (in)famous Janky Christmas Sweater Festival of Lights festivus last weekend. Adorable. But eff that gallery, we made our own, culled from submissions from the last few days. Holy McHaney, these guys have a lot of enemies! I thought gay people were all nice to each other and shit. Not.

Libertarian super-chic magazine Reason held its “Secular Christmas” party in DC last night, and Team Wonkette was all over that shit. Among the many (one) super celebrity guests was Christopher Hitchens, whose alcohol tummy shone in full force as he led a sing along to a secular version of the already-secular “Deck the Halls” carol. Then he left before we could say hi, totally lame, screw that guy. But editor Nick Gillespie — who I think I’ve called a Paultard a few times — was kindly, and we thank him for the several bottles of Yellow Tail shiraz that we chugged. Anyway, masterful chronicler of the Human Condition Liz Gorman was on the scene to take some photos, so check them out if you want to live.

Oh, we certainly did not forget. Local coalition of gays Axis of Fun, which provided us with lots of material not long ago, held its 2nd Annual Janky Christmas Sweater Festival of Lights(!) on Saturday. We heard Wonkette’s meddling in AOF’s affairs were causing quite the stir in DC’s gay scene, and we’d like to continue this (for no apparent reason other than our penchant for stirring). So please, AOF lovers and haters — and we know you’re out there — send us as many party pix as possible! A Janky McHaney X-mas to you all.