press releases
Here’s a disgusting little “BREAKING” press release we just got: “Hey guys – Wanted to make sure you saw these first pictures of Gabrielle Giffords since the tragic shooting. Please link back to story and video below if you use.” We sure will, ABC News! Wow, you really tricked that congresswoman who got shot through [...]
According to a press release, Glenn Beck is officially going to “transition off” his show later this year and will no longer be seen by the few remaining holdouts holed up in official Glenn Beck-brand bomb shelters across the nation. Fox and Beck’s production company, Mercury Radio Arts (which is, yes, probably so named just [...]
Today in the “comical e-mail press releases that make for easy posts” file we have this, the latest terrible Twitter thing about nothing. Apparently Bob McDonnell is an asexual robot while Creigh Deeds is a suicidal pederast, on Twitter: “Front-runner McDonnell is much more ‘plugged in’ and less ‘depressed’ than Deeds; but Deeds is noticeably [...]
For those of you who like terrible Keith Olbermann, because he was the “only television host to make you happy during the Bush Administration,” tomorrow’s your lucky night, according to this frightening press release: “NEW YORK – Oct. 6, 2009 – Tomorrow night on MSNBC’s ‘Countdown,’ Keith Olbermann will present a Special Comment for the [...]
Now here’s a wacky thing! The Transition team issued a release today announcing a bunch of new mid-level White House staffers (Deputy assistant director of truck nutz, etc.), and there’s a strange inconsistency with the style of the staffer bios. Each is referred to by his or her first and last names upon first mention [...]
Few e-mails — especially press releases! — have ever been so deserving of a Gmail Star. Oh, GAHH, this was for “Immediate Release” and we’re 11 hours late! Sorry! Onward.
“With a large mainstream budget and dazzling special effects, ‘Pirates II: Stagnetti’s Revenge’ is both an epic blockbuster for the ages, and a sexy, erotic adult film that consumers and distributors are fervent to get a hold of. ‘Pirates II: Stagnetti’s Revenge’ is the most pre-ordered film in adult history and Digital Playground is easily [...]
Oh look, it’s past one o’clock on any day, which means John Kerry has just e-mailed all of Washington his 64th press release of the early afternoon. And what is it about? Murder. MURRRRRDER.
Michele Bachmann Apparently First Republican To Hate Mexicans
by Wonkette Jr.
We get so many ridiculous press releases every day, we’re going to start featuring them in this new unintentional comedy section, “Press Releases Without Comment.” TO: tips@wonkette.com DATE: Wed, Aug 17, 2011 at 5:15 AM Press Release: Michele Bachmann First To Make Illegal Immigration Top Issue for 2012 August 17, 2011 (MMD Newswire) – – [...]