religion
A small-town bank in Oklahoma is under siege by governmental secularizing forces this holiday season, as the Federal Reserve is very jealous of their impressive Jesus-themed bank and wants to ruin it for everyone. According to a local teevee news station website, the Fed comes ’round every four years with a list of regulations to [...]
Texas Teabaggers have launched a campaign to oust Republican Speaker of the House Joe Straus, a guy who is a Jew, because it is time that state finally had a “true Christian leader” instead of all these Jews and Scientologists who have run the place ever since white people gypped it from the Mexicans. It [...]
Chuck Norris has a personal pastor for all of his various organization, because, well, karate needs pastors, of course. But when that pastor visited Independence Hall in Philadelphia to learn about the religion of our nation’s founding fathers, he instead was led on a tour by a guide who, rudely, only talked about the Constitution [...]
Here is something for your church to purchase! “Leading Christian experts” will teach you to “resist the Green Dragon.” Our political leaders are using scare tactics to force poor people to drink bleach, remove fetuses from every woman’s womb and turn them into terrorists, and, certainly, destroy your local well-funded, VHS-purchasing evangelical church, and some [...]
Conservatives are constantly telling us we are not allowed to wish people “Happy Holidays,” even if we don’t know their religion, and even if we are talking to freedom-loving Israeli settlers, because everyone everywhere should celebrate Jesus’ birfday. But apparently the Republican Party hates the baby messiah and his righteous Black Friday Taiwanese Blu-Ray players, [...]
As you learned in civics class, Jesus is the most important branch of the U.S. federal government. And so your afternoon editor wrote a couple of posts about That Dude yesterday and thought nothing of it. But according to a sternly written e-mail from Christ’s publicist, who writes in a tongue that is not correct [...]
We all know that Orrin Hatch loves Judaism and singing about his favorite holiday, Hanukkah. But apparently he loves all other religions too. And thus he supports the rights of Muslims to build a community center in Manhattan, if they want to, he said in an interview with a Utah Fox affiliate. No biggie. “And [...]
Wonkette operative “Evan B.” writes: “The debate over the planned mosque at Ground Zero seems a bit retarded to me; I work directly between the planned mosque and a mosque that has existed before 9/11 and continues to operate to this day. The existing mosque and the proposed mosque are probably 800 feet apart; one [...]
Actual overt anti-Semitic racist (and lesbian) Pat Buchanan, a featured pundit on a major news network, has written an awesome column today offering, among other things, his old-timey prejudiced take on that strange, recurring question that those of us who don’t believe in any of the major 1,000-3,000(?)-year-old desert ghost-man mythologies will never understand: what’s [...]
The Supreme Court and the Obama Administration and the Troops/Veterans and Jesus all got together to try to keep an illegal goddamned religious statue in Mojave National Preserve, but guess what? The Devil is stronger, because He Is Legion, and the dumb/hideous Mojave Cross Made of Plumbing Pipe was cut down by Heroes and now [...]
Today we revisit the Catholic Church, which is undergoing something of a scandal, whereby adult priests rail young children with their peens for centuries, and then no one goes to jail, and then the Church blames it on other people, and then people still choose to be involved with this institution. This is an Oligarchy, [...]
