social media
Homeland Security Is In Your Tweets, Waiting For Your Revolution
by Liz Colville
The US government is watching our every tweet, but don’t worry, it’s just to get a “situational awareness” of the world. Since 2010, the Department of Homeland Security has been monitoring “publicly available” information such as forums, Twitter accounts, and websites like WikiLeaks, Facebook and Hulu (what? – “Hey boss, I’m just monitoring these SNL [...]
Michelle Obama Takes Break From Bicep Curls to Learn Twitter (VIDEO)
by Blair Burke
Your regular installment of the FLOTUS Files was postponed this week, as your FLOTUS correspondent was kidnapped and is currently being held hostage in socialist/communist/generally terrible France, which is somehow Michelle Obama’s favorite and least favorite place of all time, favorite because of all the fanciness, and least favorite because of the time everyone ate [...]
White House Will Now Pretend To Listen To Everyone’s Crazy Ideas
by Blair Burke
Hey, America! Do you have ideas? Do you think that maybe everyone should be able to smoke lots of weed, or drive in cars without seat belts, or that we should all be ruled by robots, instead of Barack Obama or, Allah-forbid, Rick Perry? Well, terrific, because now the White House will humor you with [...]
Americans are pretty much just sitting around eating Cheetos, waiting for the government to be raptured or whatever, and trying to get the disgusting image of Boehner’s leaky blue eyes out of their recent memories. But hey, Obama wants you to know that you should not lose hope (ha ha HOPE, remember that thing?) because [...]
New Twitter User Barack Obama Not A Huge Fan Of His Job
Barry Obama from the Block finally got around to installing the Twitter application on his Blackberry this weekend, probably after John Boehner mocked him at their Golf Summit for running around without it. The president’s account to date has been filled with dry robot White House staffer tweets that made Chuck Grassley’s Twitter feed look like [...]
Rick Sanchez To Personally Overthrow Egypt Regime, Via Twitter
by Jack Stuef
Did you know Rick Sanchez is currently saving the people of Egypt from dictatorship, with the journalism and the social media? He is! If you are aware of any Egyptians who are in trouble, let Rick know, ok? He will send it out to his wider audience: his kids and his dog. And he has [...]
Genius Programmer Rick Sanchez Invents Exciting News Techonology
by Jack Stuef
BREAKING WONKETTE EXCLUSIVE: Rick Sanchez has gotten up from the couch, brushed off the Cheeto dust, and duct-taped his laptop to his teevee. This changes everything. [Twitter]
George Allen Going To Bring His Football Back To the Senate, Macacas
by Jack Stuef
Virginia’s George Allen may be the most brilliant legislator to ever play with a football on the Senate floor, but unfortunately, he also likes to use old-timey racial slurs of which nobody has ever heard, so he was defeated in 2006 for saying “macaca” on YouTube. It was an important moment in American history, according [...]
Your editor showed up at the Austin Convention Center well in advance of her panel and spent many fruitless minutes finding the registration booth, getting checked in, and assuring the registration people that she was not some impostor “Sarah Smith” from some non-Wonkette entity. Fortunately, this process went on long enough that she got to [...]
Oh, it will be a jolly time as we talk about all the terrible ways the evil corporates and inept political parties tried to use Web Techmologies to get people to do things last year! They were all so cynical and dumb, when they weren’t being naive and dumb. If none of these generalities make [...]
Remember how you voted so faithfully and got an editor of this-here politics blog onto a panel about failed social media campaigns? Well, that panel will be next Saturday, March 14 at 5PM at South by Southwest Interactive in Austin, Texas. It will be a HOOT. Rahm Emanuel will be there in his knickers! Tell [...]
